燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S02E20

Part 2 May 4, 2020, 9:23 a.m.

A heart attack with no heroin involved is a career killer.
你可以说你是嗑药过量嘛
You can say you OD'd.
你可以随便瞎掰反正我们从来不查
It doesn't have to be true, we never check.
不行
No.
不行等我死后再让无良媒体泼脏水吧
No, let the media jackals feed on my carcass after I'm dead.
歌♥手莫里森和亨德里克斯都难逃一劫
They did it to Morrison, they did it to Hendrix,
我又怎么会例外呢
why should I be any different?
可你的确和他们不一样
But you are different.
他们都是英年早逝
Those guys all died when they were young.
你说得对
You're right.
看看我老得都没法英年早逝了
Look at me. I'm too old to die young.
强尼
Johnny.
我知道医生说
I know that the doctor said
心脏病发后容易情绪不稳
that mood swings were normal after a heart attack,
可是你哭的话眼线会花的
but if you cry, you'll smear your eye liner.
-眼线 -没错
- Eye liner? - Yes.
烟熏紫貂 "绝代芳华"新款
"Smoky Sable", new from Tres Jolie.
你刚才睡觉时我帮你整理了一下妆容
I gave you a little touch-up while you were napping.
如果你准我在电视上提我就能入账万元
And if you let me mention it on TV I get $10,000.
维多利亚这次心脏病发让我看开了
Victoria, this heart attack has opened my eyes.
是的这眼线正好显得你眼大了
Yes, and now the eye liner is bringing them out,
何不与全国观众分享这等美事呢
so why not share that with a national audience?
看看我们
Look at us.
我们穷尽一生追求名利
We spent our whole lives chasing after money and fame.
最后剩下的又是什么呢
And what's it really gotten us?
名与利
Money and fame.
护士装怎会性感到让人心脏病发作
How can a nurse's outfit be so sexy it gives a man a heart attack?
也许是被维多利亚扮作
Maybe it was just the shock of seeing
人道主义者的样子吓到了
Victoria dressed as a humanitarian.
"昨晚多谢了弗雷油"
"Thanks for last night, Fried."
弗雷油
Fried?
弗雷德的手♥机♥自动修正了
Fred's phone auto-corrected.
昨晚我教会他发短♥信♥
I taught him to text last night.
在我们打完扑克后
After we played cards.
真不敢相信
I cannot believe
你是我们之中唯一找到炮♥友♥的人
that you're the only one whose booty call got answered.
你们玩得如何啊
So how was the game?
弗雷德的手上功夫可棒了
Fred had very good hands.
我甚至不用虚张声势
I didn't have to bluff once.
-你好啊弗雷德 -早安乔依
- Hello, Fred. - Morning, Joy.
我找爱尔卡
I'm looking for Elka.
我本来想打电♥话♥
I was gonna call,
看看你收到我的短♥信♥没
to find out if you got my text.
可我又想打电♥话♥多老套啊
But then I thought, calling is so old-fashioned.
我还是登门拜访吧
I'll just drop by.
我很高兴你来了
I'm glad you did.
昨晚的
You know, last night's,
那场扑克是我打得最爽的一次
uh, card game was the best I ever had.
下次我教你如何双倍下注[双飞]Next time I'll show you how to double down.
虽然不懂是什么意思
I don't know what that means,
可我光想象就全身哆嗦
but I tremble at the thought.
乔依梅兰妮再见
Joy, Melanie, good day.
-再见弗雷德 -拜
- Bye, Fred. - Bye-bye.
希望我们能早日再来一局
I hope we'll play cards soon again.
我也是
Oh, me too.
真让人受不了
This is insufferable.
他的摇滚之心还在跳动
The heart of rock n' roll is still beating,
可身体其它部分只剩蠕动了
but the rest of him is a quivering mass of neediness.
可怜的强尼
Poor Johnny.
他没什么大碍
Oh, he'll be fine.
真正遭罪的是伺候他的人
No, it's really the caretakers who suffer.
我真怀念有人让我照顾的日子
I miss having someone to take care of.
就像弗雷德
Like Fred.
照顾他一定会很有趣
Taking care of him would be a pleasure.
你和弗雷德是来真的吗
Wow, is it serious with Fred?
虽然比不上和麦克斯那种白热化的激♥情♥
Well it's not the white hot passion it was with Max,
可我们相当合拍
but we're very compatible.
手上功夫不错
Good hands.
他有爱又有趣
He's sweet and funny,
和我一样爱动物胜过爱人类
and we both prefer animals over people.
听起来你们两个挺有发展前景的
Sounds like maybe you guys have a future.
我瞎想什么呢
Oh, who am I kidding?
我不是当萨曼莎的料
I'm not a Samantha,
我是纠结真爱的夏洛特
I'm a Charlotte.
我要向他求婚
I'm gonna propose.
什么
Wha--?
维多利亚
Victoria?
帮我倒点巧克力牛奶好吗
Can I have some chocolate milk?
还有弯吸管谢谢
With a bendy straw, please?
在决定将炮♥友♥关系进一步发展之后
Having decided to go above and beyond the call of booty,
爱尔卡征用我们帮着布置她的求婚现场
Elka enlisted our help in setting the scene for her proposal.
还有什么能营造气氛的吗
So what else do we need to set the mood?
我不知道你和弗雷德喜欢什么
I don't know what you and Fred are into.
皮项圈和网球
Rawhide and a tennis ball.
是给狗狗的
For the dog.
♪美丽的人儿布置下盛宴♪
♪A pretty lady lays a lunch♪
♪是为了与真爱共续佳缘♪
♪to ask her true love to marry her♪
♪这场早午餐仿佛奇异恩典♪
♪It truly is a magic brunch♪
♪让两颗心走到了终点♪
♪that brings two hearts together♪
强尼亲爱的记得我说过
Johnny sweetie, um, you know when I said
重新工作有助于你恢复健康吗
that getting back to work could maybe help you heal?
我的意思是写点和你以前风格一样的歌♥
What I meant was writing the kinds of songs that you used to write.
性啊毒品啊
You know, about sex and drugs
到处风流不在一棵树上吊死之类的
and never staying in one place for too long?
如今在我眼中
Now I see that
性和毒品只会让人孤身走上不归路
sex and drugs are just a lonely path to self-destruction.
没错可大家在这路上走得比较欢快
Yes but it's the path people like to dance to.
爱尔卡不需要什么情歌♥
I mean, Elka doesn't even need a song,
她没有疯狂地爱上弗雷德
she's not madly in love with Fred.
他们只是两位老友
They're just two dear old friends
彼此能逗逗乐上上♥床♥
who make each other happy and have fun in the sack,
所以就决定结婚了
so why not get married?
自从我的第一首单曲达到了白金销量
You know, ever since my first single went platinum,
我便开始玩弄女性始乱终弃
I've just used women and kicked them to the curb.
日子过得相当愉快
It's been a happy life.
但总是缺少了点什么
But something's missing.
这也是我一直回来找你的原因
And it's that something that keeps drawing me back to you.
我的天你又犯心脏病了吗
Oh, my god, is it your heart again?
你干什么啊
What are you doing?
我的命是你救的
You saved my life.
和你在一起我活着才有意义
And now I need you to make it worth living.
维多利亚·蔡斯嫁给我好吗
Victoria Chase, will you marry me?
这啤酒可真不少
That's a lot of beer.
我希望他会答应嘛
Well I want him to say yes.
相信我灌醉他可不是让他答应的好办法
Trust me, you don't want a drunken yes to a marriage proposal.
明天一早他就会后悔
They just take it back in the morning,
然后七日游轮行的剩余六天你都得痛苦煎熬
then you're stuck for six more days on a seven day cruise.
我悲惨的人生啊
Oh, god, my life.
各位强尼刚才向维多利亚求婚了
Whoa! You guys, Johnny just proposed to Victoria!
她怎么回答的
What did she say?
停止吸毒后产生精神病症状或幻觉
你最好是"闪回症"发作
This had better be an acid flashback,
因为我真是受够你了先生
because I've just about had it with you, mister!
不好要是弗雷德拒绝了我怎么办
Oh, no, what if Fred turns me down too.
我看还是取消了吧
Maybe I should call this off.
来不及了
Too late.
-女士们好 -你好
- Hi, ladies. - Hi.
好一番布置
Oh, wow, some spread.
要喝圣保利辣妹啤酒吗
Would you like a St. Pauli Girl?
我比较想吃克利夫兰小甜心
I'd prefer a Cleveland cupcake.
姐超厉害的
I'm good.
梅兰妮告诉我强尼向你求婚了