杀手猴（2021）

我是说，没错，看一个人的脑袋被轰掉是件很酷的事
I mean, sure, watching a head explode is cool.
但真正的高手的目标都是脊柱
But the real pros aim for the spine.
那里是支撑一切的东西，你知道
That's what holds everything together, you know.
你把脊椎打断的话
You shoot out that cord,
就会像是切断了木偶的操纵线一样
it's like cutting the strings to a marionette.
人的身体就会瘫痪，变得软绵绵的
The body just goes whoomp, limp.
好了，我说，我们在这里做什么
Okay, come on. What are we doing here?
让你那毛茸茸的小脑袋停止胡思乱想
Let's get your furry little head out of the clouds
我们得去弄清楚谁雇用了加藤
and let's go figure out who hired Kato.
好吧，你不想再杀人了
Oh, you don't want to kill anymore?
很好，没问题
Okay, well, that's fine.
我们现在就把这整个 "复仇计划 "结束
We'll call it a day on this whole "revenge plot"
然后开一家比萨店，好吗
and open up a pizzeria, right?
嗯？逗你玩的
Huh? I'm joking. Hmm?
我们当然没办法停止杀人
Of course we're not going to stop killing people.
整个事情的重点是...
That's the whole point of this‐‐
嗯，好吧
Um, okay.
就是说，你不干了？好的，可以
So that's it, you're done? Alright, fine.
那么，先把我的墨镜还给我
Well, then give me back my sunglasses.
这是帅哥专用墨镜
Those are cool guy shades
你现在已经不酷了
and you are no longer a cool guy,
所以你不配再戴着它
so you don't get to wear 'em anymore.
嘿，上面那位请安静
Hey, keep it down up there.
很多人在这里祈祷
People are trying to pray.
这个小丑又是谁
Who's this clown?
欸，请走开，这位仁义道德先生
Eh, keep walking, Mr. Clean.
啊呀呀呀，我不是要请你道歉
Tch, tch, tch, tch. I do not ask that you apologize.
我只是希望你能尊敬一下寺庙
I ask that you respect the shrine.
另外没错，我很擅长阐述经♥文♥
It is true. I am fluent in the tongue of monkey.
我不会吃惊的
I wouldn't get too excited.
这个家伙睁着一双斗鸡眼，穿件睡衣在这闲逛
This guy's wandering around in pajamas with those weird cue ball eyes.
很明显是个疯子
Clearly he's deranged.
好吧，至少我不是死人
Well, at least I'm not dead.
嘿，混♥蛋♥，我们这里刚好有点不太方便
Hey, asshole, we're kind of in the middle of something here,
所以也许你应该去和你的朋友们
so maybe you should just go on and play dress up
继续玩角色扮演游戏和...
with your friends over there and‐‐
我勒个去！等等，你能听见我
Holy shit! Wait, can you hear me?
老兄！谢天谢地
Dude! What a relief.
我已经和这只蠢猴子叽叽喳喳的
I have been jibber‐jabbering with this dumb‐ass monkey
念叨了两个星期了
for two weeks now!
杀手猴
拥有无限智慧的命运
Fate in her infinite wisdom
把你们拴在一起是有原因的
has tethered you together for a reason.
没错，就是干掉那些
Yeah, to take out the pieces of shit
杀死我和猴子部落的王八蛋们
who killed me and his monkey crew.
我们应该是一起复仇的
We're supposed to be on this revenge‐quest together.
但我向上帝发誓，我觉得到目前为止
But I swear to God, I feel like I'm over here
都是我一个人在做事
doing all the killing by myself.
当我还年轻时...
When I was a young...
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
我看着你突突死至少20个坏蛋
I watched you mow down 20 badass commandos
就像在玩“魂斗罗”
like it was a game of Contra.
...正如我说的，经♥文♥提到...
...As I was saying, the sacred texts
你别叫了
You are cut out for this.
傻子才会多愁善感
Feelings are for suckers. Okay?
我是头脑，而你是肌肉
I'm the brain. You're the muscle.
你只需要听我的话放手去做好你的工作... -听着
You need to nut up and do your job... ‐ Listen!
你俩都给我安静点
Silence! Both of you.
你们连自己的心声都不愿意听
How can you listen to each other
又怎么能倾听对方的声音呢
when you won't even listen to yourselves?
你迷失了自己
You are lost.
但如果你允许的话
But if you allow it,
你的旅程将引导你找到答案
your journey will guide you to the truth.
你的道路可能是坎坷的，但随着时间的推移
Your path may be rocky, but in time,
你会逐渐形成坚硬的老茧
you will come to develop the calluses necessary
帮你不断前进
to keep moving forward
完成你的命运
and fulfill your destiny.
嗯哼，是是是，它会得到一堆水泡
Mm‐hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's gonna get some blisters.
那我呢，我会怎样
What about me? What do I get?
一片荒芜的土地
A barren field...
没有任何生物存活
where nothing can grow
直到你找到土壤中邪恶的种子
until you find the seed of evil
并把它清除之后
and rip it from the soil.
你才能得到升华
Only then shall you ascend.
你在开玩笑吗
Are you kidding me?
他的意思当然是我说了算
Of course he was saying I'm in charge!
我才是那个需要找到邪恶种子的人
I'm the one that needs to find the evil seed
然后我就能摆脱掉现在无聊的状态
so I can blow this pop stand.
不不不，既然我们被绑在一起了
No, no, no. How can we be on separate paths
我们怎么能分别走不同的路呢
when we're stuck together?
我们要在我的带领下去下一个地方
We're going the same place. And I'm leading the way.
伙计，我♥干♥杀人这行已经20多年了
Man, I've been killing people for over 20 years.
你干这个才多久，嗯？20分钟吗
You've been doing it, what? For 20 minutes?
所以，谁更适合做头儿
So who makes the most sense to be in charge, huh?
不对，又错了
Nope, wrong again.
这不在于有没有身体，而在于会不会用脑袋思考，比如我
Not the one with the body. The one with the brain. That's me.
那个在葬礼上明智的告诉你去拿加藤钱包的脑袋
The same brain that wisely told you to grab Kato's wallet at the funeral.
于是我们就可以通过里面的驾照
It's wise because we can use his driver's license
知道他的住址
to get his address.
赢了
Ta‐da
噢，嗯
Oh, uh‐‐
啊，就像是，你会用撒尿来标记你的领土是吧
Okay, well, you know how you piss on everything to mark your territory?
住址就是类似的意思
An address is like the human version of that.
有一场该死的暴风雨正向我袭来
There's a goddamn shit storm raining down on me.
这意味着同时它也向你们袭来
Which means it's now raining down on you.
我们现在有个老太太被锯成两半
We've got old ladies getting sawed in half,
政客死亡
dead politicians,
黑社会的帮派战争发生在大街上
and a Yakuza gang war spilling out onto the streets.
我们应该把猴子的事情说出来，伊藤
We should tell them about the monkey, Ito‐keiji.
没什么可说的
There's nothing to tell.
那毛发，监控录像
The fur. The surveillance video.
我们有证据 -嗯
We have evidence. ‐ Mmm.
我们是警探，我们的工作就是遵循证据
We're detectives, and our job is to follow the evidence
不管他把我们引到哪里，对吗
wherever it leads us, right?
唔
Mmm.
在老家，我办过一个案子
Back home, I worked a case
山口先生农场里的红薯总是不断失窃
where sweet potatoes kept disappearing from Mr. Yamaguchi's farm.
总之，动物也有能力犯罪
Anyway, animals are capable of committing crimes, too.
我不明白，为什么不能直接把我们的理论告诉他们呢
I don't understand. Why can't we just tell them our theory?
你指的是一只穿着西装的猴子在街上
You mean our theory that a monkey in a suit
上窜下跳的把黑帮成员都杀了吗
is running around town killing gangsters?
嘿，我知道你喝多了以后喜欢胡言乱语
Hey, I know you like to blabber when you're drunk,
但我们大家都在集中注意力听取指示
but the rest of us are trying to pay attention.
那就在我把你那条马尾辫塞进
Turn around before I grab that ponytail
你搭档的裤裆里之前，转回身去
and shove it up your partner's ass.
你知道吗，你就是个混球，伊藤
You know what? You're a dick, Ito.
现在，有没有人有任何我们可以跟进的实质性的线索
Now does anyone have any actual leads that we can follow up on?
别，绫濑，拜托，不要
Don't. Haruka, please. D‐don't!
好，绫濑
Yes, Haruka.
噢，上帝
Ah, Jesus.
谁说拥有一个小孩儿的身体就没有好处了
Who says having a little toddler bod doesn't have its advantages,
我说的对吗
am I right?
哇，看来将军在与债务的战争中失败了
Whoa. Looks like the General was losing his battle with debt.
你懂吗，因为这些账单
You know, because of the bills?
能看出他欠了不少钱
Because he owes money?
说实话，我觉得这跟你说这些都是浪费
Honestly, I feel like these are wasted on you.
不，猴子，不
No! Monkey, no!
嘿，我敢肯定，这孩子没有他会过得更好
Hey, I'm sure the kid's better off without him.
我从没见过我父亲，瞧我，一直都很顺利
I never knew my dad and look at me, I turned out great.
噢，不，这...
Oh no, it's no‐‐
噢，坏了，有人来了