绝望写手（2021）

没关系，无所谓 我搞砸了，很抱歉
Fine. Whatever. I f**ked up. I'm really sorry.
但拜托别抛弃我们所有的努力
But, please, don't throw away everything we worked so hard on
就因为你生我的气
just because you're mad at me.
这与你无关
This isn't about you.
我就是不想表演 我知道怎么做才能成功
I just don't want to do it. I know what works.
旧脚本很受欢迎 所以我要用旧的
The old stuff works, so that's what I'm doing.
The stuff we've worked on is good.
我们写的东西很棒
重要的是由你来表演
And it's important that you do it!
你没资格告诉我什么才重要
You don't get to tell me what's important!
你什么风险都不用冒 这只是昙花一现
You're risking nothing here. This is just a blip.
你大可明天就跳上飞机
You can get on a plane tomorrow.
将一切当成你某份工作的趣闻
This is just gonna be a funny story
about a job you once had.
这可是我的人生
This is my life!
我不需要做一场 沉迷于过去的表演
I don't need to do a whole show dwelling on the past!
我只往前进，始终如此 讨论完毕
I move forward. Always have. End of discussion.
这一切浪费了多少时间啊
What a giant waste of time this all was.
我同意
Oh, I agree.
And my time is a lot more valuable than yours.
而且我的时间比你的宝贵多了
真抱歉喔
Oh, I'm so sorry.
我害你错过了什么大好机会？
What great opportunity did I keep you from?
炸鸡连锁速食店 想请你当新的看板人物吗？
Does KFC want you to be the new Colonel Sanders?
Oh, and that just wouldn't be cool, would it?
那就一点也不酷了，对吧？
老天，我受够了 你自命不凡的鬼话
God, I'm so sick of your pretentious bullshit.
What have you even done?
你又做过些什么？
我做过的表演让外头高朋满座
What I've done has gotten all those people in those seats.
你做过的事只让你被赶出洛杉矶
What you've done has gotten you booted out of LA
and now you're getting booted from here.
现在你也要被赶出这里了
滚出我的更衣室
Get the hell out of my dressing room.
不对，你只是害怕困难
No. You're just scared to do the hard thing
所以一有能逃的机会，你就逃了
so you're jumping at the first possible chance to bail.
你要做那千篇一律的老掉牙表演
You're gonna do the same old tired shit you always do
因为见到你的那天 我的想法就是对的
because I was right the day I met you.
You are a f**king hack.
你就是个庸才
你好啊，我的超级巨星 准备好要搞笑了吗？
Hello, my superstars. Who's ready to be funny?
什么人会甩人巴掌啊？
Who slaps people?
我不干了，当然了
Well... I quit, obviously.
我们让你独处一下
Oh, we're gonna give you a minute.
Kayla, let's go.
凯拉，我们走
我用一颗抗焦虑药跟你换根烟
I'll trade you a Xanny for a cigarette.
没问题
You got it.
我是凯拉 在哔声后留言，宝贝
It's Kayla. Leave a message at the beep, babe.
Beep.
哔
开玩笑的
Kidding.
喂，凯拉
Hey, Kayla.
可以给我那些英国编剧的 电子邮件吗？
Can you send me the emails of those British writers?
我知道他们不会雇用我
I know they're not gonna hire me
但我有一些黛博拉的轶事 他们可能会想用
but I have some stories about Deborah they might want to use.
＂两千五百场表演＂
你真是个幸运男子，能有她伴随
You're a lucky man. You're a lucky man to have her.
不是的，她是我的助理
- Oh, no... - She's my assistant.
－你妹妹？ －我助理
- Your sister? - My assistant.
He wishes I was his sister.
他超希望我是他妹
Messy.
贵圈真乱呀
－好的，没问题，乐意之至 －能帮我拿杯酒吗？
- Okay. - Can you go get me a drink?
Absolutely. Love to.
打扰一下
Excuse me.
黛博拉，借一步说话好吗？
Deborah, can I talk to you for a second?
Sure, of course. Excuse us.
当然好，失陪了
Okay, thank you.
好，谢谢
我知道现在 不是这么做的最好时机
I know this isn't the best time to do this
但我担心如果现在不说 就永远说不出口
but I'm worried if I don't say it now, I'll never say it.
I realize that I've prioritized your business...
我意识到自己 总是将你的事业摆在第一位
And I have completely taken that for granted.
我也总是认为那是理所当然的
And I'm sorry. You were right.
对不起，你是对的
You've been right the whole time, Marcus.
你一直都是对的，马可斯
过去几周取消跟你开会 是我的错
I was wrong to cancel meetings with you the last few weeks.
It's just been stupid and...
实在太蠢了 我想让事业更上一层楼‥
I want to take my business to the next level
and I want to do it with you.
而且我想跟你一起努力
那也正是我想要的
That's... what I want too, exactly.
Good.
很好‥
And I want to make you CEO, effective immediately
我要将你升为执行长，立即生效
同时加薪一成
with a 10% raise.
好的‥
Okay.
- Great. Thank you. - No, please.
－太好了，谢谢你 －别这么说
拜托别谢我，这是你应得的
Please don't thank me. You deserve this.
决定好要穿哪双鞋了吗？
So did you decide on the shoes?
鞋子啊，马可斯，帮帮我吧
Oh, the shoes, yes. Marcus, help me here.
我应该穿低跟，方便走路‥
Do I wear the lower heel, which I know I can walk in
还是该选漂亮的细高跟鞋
or do I go with the fabulous stilettos?
－很美吧？ －美极了
- Aren't they gorgeous? - Beautiful.
但我觉得穿低跟比较好 那么痛不值得
I think the low heel. The pain's not worth it.
Okay, thanks.
好，谢了
- Hey. - Hey.
－你打扮得好帅 －你也是
- You look great. - You too.
我有一些好消息
So I have some good news.
黛博拉让我升官了
Deborah gave me a promotion, and I am now the CEO.
我现在是执行长
太棒了 但我以为你本来就是执行长
That's awesome.
But wait, I thought you were already CEO.
－我本来是营运长 －恭喜你成了不同的长
- I was COO. - Oh, well, congrats.
- I'm glad you got your E. - Thank you.
－谢谢 －根据我对资本主义的了解
And based on what I know about capitalism
你现在不用担心缴税问题了
I think now you don't have to worry about paying taxes.
我甚至没说那一大段话
And I actually didn't even have to go into my whole spiel.
她自己就帮我升职了
She just did it.
等等，所以你没有跟她谈？
Wait, so you didn't actually talk to her?
No, I didn't have to.
没有必要啊
如果你是担心锡安之旅 我们还是能去啊
If this is about Zion, we can still go.
－我们还是能去？ －对
- We can still go? - Yeah.
我们本来就要去 那是计划好的
We're going. The plan is to go.
Yes, of course.
对，当然，只是现在这个新职位
It's just, I have this new role
我至少得做一些工作
so I'm gonna have to do at least a little bit of work
才能在下两周掌握好最新情况
just to stay on top of things for the next couple weeks.
旅行的重点就是不要工作
The point of the trip is to not work.
你若想在我工作少一点时再去
If you want to go when I have less work
then we can go in the summer.
我们可以夏天再去
Look, I really like you, but...
听着，我很喜欢你，但‥
但是什么？
But what?
If you think I'm not ready for a relationship
你若担心我 还没准备好投入感情‥
- because I'm... - No. No, that's not it.
不是的‥
因为你已经投入一段感情了
'Cause you're already in a relationship.
－跟黛博拉 －不是的
- With Deborah. - No.
我们去外面再谈吧
Let's go outside and then talk.
- Whatever you want, I am in. - Hey.
无论你想要什么，我也都想要
黛博拉要敬酒致词了
Deborah's about to do her toast.
糟了，我得去后台了
Shit. Okay, I do have to go backstage.
But come with me, all right?
但跟我去，好吗？
我们可以喝点儿香槟，坐一会儿
We can have some champagne. We can sit.
不了，我要走了
No. I'm gonna go.
Wilson, I...
威尔森，我‥
非常感谢在场每位今晚莅临
Thank you, every single one of you, so, so much for coming tonight.
拜托各位在观众席时
And please, when you're out there, when in doubt, laugh.
不管怎样，笑就对了
也恳求各位 不要起立鼓掌超过五分钟
And I beg you
don't let the standing ovation go longer than five minutes.
但也别比四分钟短 因为那是席琳的纪录
But not less than four, 'cause that's Celine's record.
总之，请容我失陪，我要去祷告
Anyway, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go say my prayers
我们待会儿见
so I'll see you out there.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
干杯‥
－黛博拉？ －吉米？
- Deborah? - Jimmy?
我只想说，我父亲过世时
I just wanted to say
when my father passed
你不必陪在我身边 但你还是陪着我
you didn't need to stick with me, but you did.