鬼屋欢乐送

一共有6个战术呢 你每次都选中我的
There's six plays. You pick mine every time.
你可能就是很容易被我猜中吧
I guess you're just really predictable.
那不可能啊
That's impossible.
没人能猜对那么多次啊
No one can guess right that many times.
的确不可能 这是怎么回事
That is impossible. What's going on?
搞什么 你们在作弊吗
What the hell? Are you cheating?
没有啊 我发誓
No. I swear.
我只是在挖鼻子
I was just picking my nose.
我觉得鬼鬼根本就没有鼻屎
I don't even think we have boogers.
不许再作弊了
This stops now.
作弊者们 祝你们作弊好运
Good luck cheating now, cheaters.
你要选战术了吗
You gonna pick a play?
是 我就是在 思考
Yes, I am. I'm just...thinking.
特雷弗 你立刻住手
Trevor, you stop this at once.
你没办法逼我
You can't make me.
但我可以
But I can.
厚头龙来了
Pachycephalosaurus chargel
他动了
He moved?
抱歉
Sorry.
现在只剩我了
It's just me now.
什么 -没事
What? - Nothing.
我们跳舞吧
Let's dance.
嘿 伙计
SASAPPIS Hey, buddy.
我们想告诉你一件事 也许你不太想听
We wanted to tell you something, and it may be hard to hear,
但你是我们的朋友
but you're our friend,
我们想确保你
and we wanted to make sure you weren't gonna make
在死后不会犯
the same mistake in your afterlife
和你生前一样的错误
as you did in your life- life.
所以我们进行了忠诚度考验
So we set up loyalty test,
想看看卡萝尔是否改变了
to see if Carol really changed,
但是很遗憾 她并没有变
but, unfortunately...she not changed.
我 我不明白
I- I don't understand.
你们想说什么啊
What are you guys trying to say?
索尔勾引了她
So Thor made a pass at her,
希望她能让他滚一边去
hoping that she would tell him to get lost,
但正相反 她居然扑倒了他
but instead, she threw herself at him.
对吧 索尔 -对
Right, Thor? - Yes.
卡萝尔非常迷索尔
Carol very into Thor.
抱歉
I'm sorry.
但是知道这事挺好的 对吧 皮特
But it's good to know this, right, Pete?
我是说 那证明不了什么啊
Well, I mean, that doesn't prove anything.
她可能只是为了表示礼貌
She was probably just being polite.
如果说真有什么的话 只是无害的调情嘛
If anything, it was just a little harmless flirting.
不是 可比调情厉害多了
No, it was much more than flirting.
索尔和卡萝尔上♥床♥了
Thor and Carol have sex.
等等 什么 -我天
Wait, what? Oh, Godl
你对我老婆干什么了
What did you do with my wife?
你想让索尔具体点说吗
You want Thor to be specific?
好吧 我们一开始
Okay, well, first, we start off
用的是倒转体♥位♥ 然后
with backwards ram, then
皮特 我不知道他跟她睡了
Pete, I did not know that he slept with her, okay?
他本来只要确认她是否会出轨就行了
He was just supposed to see if she would cheat.
我不就是那么做的吗
Which is exactly what I do.
为什么大家都这么生气啊
Why is everyone so angry?
因为你睡了我老婆
Because you slept with my wife!
我是为了你才睡的啊
I did this for you.
为了友谊
For friendship.
你以为索尔喜欢吗
You think it was fun for Thor?
好像是挺喜欢的
I guess it was,
但是享受任务也没错啊
but there's nothing wrong with enjoying your job.
这不是你该做的事 -你什么毛病啊
This is not what you're supposed to do...What is the matter with you?
还有你是什么毛病 是你把他
And what is wrong with you, too? You're the one
拖下水的
that roped him into this?
－为了你啊 -你们这是吵什么呢
For you! What's all the hubbub about?
你跟索尔上♥床♥了
You had sex with Thor?
你告诉他了
You told him?
就这样吧 卡萝尔 我们彻底完了
That's it, Carol. We are through.
从现在开始你特么自己揉脚吧
You can rub your own damn feet from now on.
还有你
And you!
你真是个糟糕的朋友
You're a terrible friend.
好了 冷静点 小兄弟
Okay. Calm down, little buddy.
我不是你的小兄弟
I'm not your little buddy!
你给我记住了
And don't you forget it.
耶 就是这样
Yeah! That's how you do it.
天了噜 这也太刺♥激♥了
Oh, my God, this is tense.
还有一分钟 杰领先两分
Jay is up two points with one minute to go.
这是否比看走路更刺♥激♥呢
Is this more exciting than watching walking?
有待商榷
It is debatable.
我得说 杰
You know, I got to say, you gave me
你可真是给我吓了一老跳
a pretty good scare there, Jay.
还没结束呢 -没有吗
It's not over. - Isn't it?
我所要做的就是站在射门位置
All I got to do is get in field goal position,
对我来说简直易如反掌
where I am automatic.
我老弟肯定会干掉你的
My little brother's about to wipe your butt.
没错 我坚持这个观点
That's right, I'm sticking with it.
无可辩驳
I'm making it a thing.
有那么一刻
You know, there was a minute there
我真以为自己要接管
where I thought I was actually gonna have
我爸的公♥司♥了
to take over my dad's company,
但现在我可以继续住在这里 -等等 你说什么
but now I can just- keep living here. - Wait, what?
萨曼 他在说什么
Sam, what's he talking about?
你不是说自己被解雇了吗 -对
I thought you said- you were fired? - Yeah.
因为我拒绝接管他的公♥司♥
For refusing to take over his company.
我觉得莱尼应该是想
I think Lenny was just trying to motivate me
对我用激将法吧 -我没明白啊
or something. I don't understand.
你为什么不肯接管他的公♥司♥呢
Why wouldn't you want to take over the company?
你不爱照明行业吗 -不
You don't love the lighting business? - Oh, no.
我超爱灯的
I freaking love lights.
当你找到了完美的组合
When you find that perfect grouping
当你找到了完美的组合
and fill a room with that magical glow,
这是一种神一般的感觉
it's a godlike feeling.
那还有什么问题呢
So, then what's the problem?
因为我爸那么做只是为了表示好意
Because my dad's just doing it to be nice.
我天生就不是干这事的料
I'm not cut out to run anything.
特雷弗才是有商业头脑的那个
Trevor was the one with the head for business.
我肯定会搞砸的
I'd probably just screw it up.
不 你不会 你是个聪明的孩子
No, you wouldn't. You're a smart kid.
你一周就学会了旧约书里的哈夫塔拉
You learned your haftarah in, like, a week.
那是外墙啊
That was an exterior wall.
我从两层楼上跌了下来
I fell two stories.
我知道我们不会受伤
I mean, I know we can't get hurt,
但为什么没人出去找我呢
but why didn't anyone come looking for me?
我错过什么了
What'd I miss?
好了 还剩10秒
AlI right, ten seconds to go.
是时候射球入门结束比赛了
Time to kick this field goal and end it.
不
No.
你该长大了 老弟
It's time for you to grow up, little brother.
不
No!
我赢了 -万岁
I won! - Huzzah!
万岁
Huzzah!
刚发生什么了
What the hell just happened?
你老哥刚刚把你推出了巢
Your big brother just shoved you out of the nest.
特钱钱
T- Money.
干得漂亮 特雷弗
Nice work, Trevor.
如果杰的名字是特雷弗我就会这么说
Is what I would say if Jay's name were Trevor,
这个名字我们这周末提了很多次
which is a name that we've discussed a lot this weekend,
所以才会搞混了
hence the mix- up.
别再说了
Stop talking.
等等 皮特打了索尔吗 -没错
Hold up, Pete punched Thor? - That's right.
这背后的故事可复杂了－皮特
And there's a lot more where that came from- - Peter.