鬼屋欢乐送

要不了多久了
It won't be long now.
她承受了太多痛苦
She had a tremendous innings.
至少她现在很舒服
At least she's comfortable.
还有比这惨的呢
Yeah, there are worse ways to go.
-没错 -还用你说
- Well, this is it. - You're telling me!
没错
You can say that again.
安静
Quiet.
要开始了
I think it's happening.
准备
Stand by.
她要走了
I think she's going.
她能留下来就好了
Oh, I do hope she stays.
我赌十块她会留下来
Tenner says she stays.
-成交 -我看不见了 能不能抬高一点
- Deal. - I can't see anything. Can you lift me up a bit?
又来了
Oh, not this again.
你们是谁
Who are you?
我是你曾祖母的鬼魂
I am the ghost of your great-grandmother.
我们是因为一些未知的原因
We are those poor spirits who dwell on,
被困于此的鬼魂
compelled for reasons unknown...
她走了
Ah, she's gone.
-真走运 -真幸福
- Lucky cow. - Good on her, actually.
怎么回事 我只能看见你们的鞋
What's going on? All I can see is shoes.
-你欠我十块 -不不
- You owe me ten. - Oh, no, no.
如果你有听完我说的
If you listened to what I actually said...
别说了
Oh, don't start.
别吵了
Guys, if you please!
来个人说点什么吧
Perhaps one of us should say a few words.
我来吧
Yes, I'll do it.
她的屋我要了
Bagsie her room.
她刚刚才过世
Oh, she's only just died.
我肯定会等到她被接走以后啊
Well, I'll wait until they've taken her away, of course.
她是巴顿庄园的最后一位主人
She was the last Button of Button House.
今天最后一位巴顿也死了
The final Button died today.
虽然我们不知她魂归何处
Though, where she goes, we cannot say.
他又开始了
Oh, he's off again.
-一切恍如隔日 -拜托
- It seems but only yesterday... - Hey, come on.
别丢下我 愚蠢的身体
Don't go without me. Oh, stupid body.
她的一生 就像
Her life, twas like...
一出话剧
..a play.
但她没有子女
But with no children of her own,
谁来继承这个房♥子呢
who then will come to call this home?
这比我们租的房♥子要大
Well, it's bigger than the place we're renting.
也有点超预算了
And slightly over budget, but...
有花♥园♥吗
Does it have a garden?
没有 不过楼下的公♥寓♥有 你们可以看
No, but the downstairs flat's got one you can look at.
是吗
Yeah?
抱歉 稍等
Sorry, one second.
您好 克拉西·休斯房♥产中介
Hello, Clasey Hughes Estate.
街上景色不错啊
Nice view of the street.
是啊
Yeah.
"哥俩好炸鱼&披萨"
"Buddy's Fish 'n' Pizza."
这俩我们都喜欢
Well, we do like both those things.
-这就是垃圾 是吧 -嗯
- It's rubbish, isn't it? - Yep.
-太烂了 -太糟糕了
- It's so bad. - It's awful.
我很不喜欢
And I hate it.
-抱歉 -没事 很正常
- Sorry. - Nah, fair enough.
我也不想住在这里
I wouldn't want to live here either.
喂
Hello?
喂 是艾莉森·库珀吗
Hello, is that Alison Cooper?
-是我 -我想谈谈一栋房♥子
- Speaking. - I'm calling about a house.
我们只看公♥寓♥ 买♥♥不起房♥子
We're only looking at flats. We can't afford to buy a house.
这房♥子不卖♥♥
This one's not for sale.
那你打什么电♥话♥
Then why are you calling?
天啊 我真讨厌房♥产中介
God, I hate estate agents.
除了你这么好的
Apart from the good ones like you.
喂
Yep?
抱歉 我们可能有点误会
Sorry, I think we've got off on the wrong foot.
我是沃辛 科尔和西蒙斯的律师
I'm a solicitor at Worthing, Cole and Simons, and I'm calling
我打电♥话♥来是想通知你 你有个房♥子要继承
to inform you that you have in fact inherited a house.
喂
Hello?
喂
Hello?
鬼屋欢乐送
第一季 第一集
你在这个角
That's you in the corner there.
所以她是我的继姑奶
So, she was like my step-great auntie?
其实你没什么名分
There's no real term for what you are,
但很遗憾 她除了你没有别的亲人了
but she sadly had no direct relatives and so you're the only one.
我像在校长办公室一样
I feel like I'm in the head master's office.
我把褪色柳弄到丹尼尔·贝林厄姆的耳朵里了
I put a pussy willow in Daniel Bellingham's ear,
他想弄出来却顶得更深了
and he tried to get it out and just pushed it further in.
最后只能去看医生了
He had to go to the doctors.
去的不是急诊室 只是
It wasn't A&E or anything, it was just...
他没事了 他现在是糕点厨师
He's fine now. He's a pastry chef.
这看起来不错啊
These look nice.
这是干花
That's potpourri.
她老吗
Was she old?
去世时99岁
She was 99.
就差一点
Oh, so close.
这就是她
And there she is.
海瑟·巴顿女爵
Lady Heather Button.
巴顿家族历史渊源
The Buttons go back a long way.
女爵
Lady?
这是不是意味着我也是女爵
Does that mean I'm a lady?
我知道我是淑女 我是说女爵
OK, I know I'm a lady, but, like, a lady lady?
就像嘎嘎小姐 不
Like, Lady Gaga. No, no...
不会是这个房♥子吧
It's not this house, is it?
其实就是这个
As a matter of fact, it is.
巴顿庄园
Button House.
不
No.
很明显这个房♥子几年内很难找到买♥♥家
Now, obviously, it can take several years to find a buyer
来卖♥♥掉
and close the sale...
豪华连锁酒店集团之类的
Luxury hotel chains, that sort of thing.
-我们要是不卖♥♥呢 -好主意啊
- What if we keep it? - Yes. That is a great idea.
这个房♥子年久失修
The house is in a state of some disrepair.
反正我们也想找点事做
We were looking for a bit of a project anyway
我才把公♥寓♥水槽后面重砌了
and I retiled the bit behind the sink in our last flat, so...
-防溅板吗 -是吗
- The splashback? - Is it?
这算不上自己装♥修♥吧
I'm not sure this falls into the category of DIY.
你们起码做个调查再
You should at least have a survey done before...
我就是觉得还是留着比较好
I just feel like it would be better to keep it in the family.
我觉得这也是她所希望的
I think, actually, that's what she would have wanted.
-海伦姑奶 -海瑟
- Aunt Helen. - Heather.
-海瑟 -如果这能变成连锁酒店
- Heather. - And if it can make money for some hotel chain,
还不如让我们俩来经营
then why not make it work for us?
-我们可以辞职 -是的
- We could give up our jobs. - Yes.
全职经营
We could do this full time.
是的
OK, yes.
我们想留下 可以吗
Can we keep it? If we want to?
这毕竟是你的房♥子
Well, it is your house.
抱歉
Sorry.
看看谁来了
Look what the cat's dragged in.
这边
Down here.
近了
You're warm.
更近了
Getting warmer.
到了
You're boiling.
不 远了 更远了
No. Cold... Getting cold.
这里 聋子
Down here! You deaf...
我有耳朵吧
Well, I've got the ears, haven't I?
小人
Little guy...
-卒 -卒
- Pawn. - Prawn...
这里 这里
Go dooka, dooka.
-但这是 -将死
- But that's... - Checkmate.