说唱王戴夫

Dave S02E08

Part 2 Aug. 24, 2022, 8:42 a.m.

Okay, I know that you have a very specific plan
为今后所有事情做的打算
for how everything is supposed to go,
而这件事应该
and that this is
不是你计划里的一环
not part of that, probably.
但这就是绕个路的事
But it's just a detour.
没错就是绕个路的事
Yeah, just a detour.
那我猜可能你不会想要你的呃
Well, I guess you probably don't want your, uh,
乔迁礼物了
housewarming gifts.
你给我带了礼物 -没错
‐ You got me gifts? ‐ Yeah.
来吧到我的呃
Come on. Come to my, uh,
车边来我把礼物都放里面了
my car, where I have the gifts located.
快来 -好啊
‐ Come on. ‐ Sure.
我很期待 -好啊
‐ I'm in pursuit. ‐ Yeah.
百分百的多个真实礼物
100% authentic gifts.
还不止一个礼物 -没错这是...
‐ There's multiple? ‐ Yeah. And this...
这...这是什么
What‐what is this?
这是什么这是个能围住头发的头带
What is this? It's a headband for your hair.
你不是一直想要这个吗你经常就会说
Like you've always wanted. You're always like,
“啊我的头发” -我有这么说吗
‐ "Aah, my hair." ‐ Am I saying that?
这是为你特殊定制的快试试
It was custom‐made for you. So try it on.
好吧
Okay. Huh.
噢哦我天
Oh. Oh, my God.
我带起来好看吗 -太棒了你看起来很不错
‐ Do I look good in this? ‐ Stunning. You look amazing!
这样好看吗
Is this a good look?
你甚至可以去当个专业的好莱坞足球选手
You should be a professional fuckin' Halloween player for soccer.
什么 -而且...
‐ What? - And...
好我拿到了
Okay, got it
大的要来了
This is the big one.
准备好 -我可得先走开一点
Get ready. ‐ Ooh, I gotta get out of your way.
你准备好了吗 -准备好了
‐ Are you ready? ‐ Yeah.
你没开玩笑吧 -我没有
‐ Did you really? ‐ I did.
你真的超过了你自己
You have truly outdone yourself.
怎么说 -我的意思是这东西
‐ Yeah. ‐ You have gotten me the worst gift
是一个男人能收到的最糟糕的礼物
a man could receive. I mean,
我甚至吹不起一个气球
I can't even blow up a balloon.
我知道 -你知道的
‐ Okay. ‐ You know that.
我是忘记了你说...
I did forget that you sa‐‐
我吹不了 -但我觉得这是假的
‐ I can't. - But I also don't think that's true,
你试试啊 -你觉得我是在骗...
‐ try it. ‐ You think I li‐‐
你听起来就像个我需要应付的恶霸
Now you sound like the bullies that I had to deal with
那些会说"这家伙甚至连个气球都吹不起来"的人
who said, "This guy can't blow up a balloon."
我真不行我的下巴没办法这么做
I can't. I have a slack jaw.
那你就还给我吧
Okay, then give it to me,
我会送给一个能吹气球的人
and I will give it to someone who can blow it.
这不公平这是我的礼物我想怎么做就怎么做
That's unfair. I can use the gift any way I want.
戴维...
Dave...
这是我的了感谢你的所有礼物
It's mine. I appreciate all these gifts.
不用谢不用谢
You're welcome. You're welcome.
你可以把钱打给我
You can just Venmo me.
我不
No.
你不能把每个你看见的葡萄干都怪在我身上
You can't blame me for every raisin that you see
你们有看到我的笔记本吗 -我们都有吃葡萄干
Have you guys seen my laptop anywhere? ‐ We both eat raisins.
我没看见 -我不是每个都怪你
‐ I haven't seen it. ‐ I'm not blaming you for every raisin,
就是这三个 -是啊但这上面又没写我的名字
‐ just these three. ‐ Yeah, and what, do they have my name on it?
你在干嘛
What are you doing?
别碰我的笔记本
Please get off of my laptop.
我在听你去年做的歌♥
I was listening to the records that you made this past year.
不行戴维你不能再这样把我蒙在鼓里了
No, Dave, you can't keep me in the dark anymore, man.
这不关你的事
This is none of your business.
这是我现在唯一要管的事
This is literally my only business.
起码让我试试帮帮你吧
At least let me try and help you.
你文件夹都找错了
You're not even in the right folder.
好吧行那我应该点哪个
Okay, well, where do I go?
"鸡之可能"
"Penith possibilities."
"鸡之可..."
"Penith poss‐‐"
可能 -我知道
‐ Possibilities. ‐ I get it.
这些都没有排好顺序
There's no organization to this.
现在就是随机播放
You're playing stuff at random.
好吧这首"Me Too"是什么
Okay, what's‐what's "Me Too"?
这是一首激进的... -让我听听
‐ "Me Too" is a radical... ‐ Let's hear it.
♪ 你想要在床上抱抱我也是 ♪
♪ You wanna cuddle in my bed? Me, too ♪
♪ 你想要来翻云覆雨我也是 ♪
♪ Are you on board to have sex? Me, too ♪
♪ 你想要冲上云霄噢我也是 ♪
♪ Oh, you came? Oh, me, too! ♪
♪ 你想要用点洗发露我也是 ♪
♪ Do you use shampoo? Me, too ♪
♪ 你喜欢看电影嘛我也是 ♪
♪ Do you fuck with movies? Me, too ♪
♪ 你想要来做♥爱♥吗噢我也是 ♪
♪ Do you wanna fuck? Oh, yeah, me, too ♪
♪ 噢我无意冒犯 ♪
♪ Ooh, respectfully. ♪
你知道现在世界上发生了什么事吗
Okay, do you know what's going on right now
我觉得这 -啊什么我不是...
in the world? I just think that's, ‐Yeah, what? I don't...
我不觉得这是个好主意就是
I don't think it's a good idea. like,
可能事你能想到的最糟糕的事情
the worst thing you could ever have thought.
没错我不喜欢这首
Yeah, I don't like it.
来看看这首"Jenkum" 什么是"Jenkum"
Okay, what about "Jenkum"? What is "Jenkum"?
噢
Ooh.
那是一个我内心深处的美好 Jenkum是呃
It's a sweet spot in my heart. Jenkum is, uh,
你拉一泡便便然后把它放在塑料袋里...
when you take shit and you put it in a plastic bag...
你可以不用说了 -然后你让他发酵
‐ Okay, that's enough. ‐ ...and you let it ferment.
然后你吸一口你就... -我不需要知道了
‐ And you huff it, and you...‐ I don't need to hear it.
这首"艾丽的歌♥"是什么
What about "Ally's Song"?
这是首做完的歌♥吗如果是的话
Is that a real thing? Because if it is,
我们应该马上发出去 -不这首歌♥放错文件夹了
‐ we should put it out immediately. ‐ No, that's in the wrong folder.
这是"艾丽的歌♥" 这没有放在对的...
It's "Ally's Song," and it's not even in the right...
噢行那让我来听听看
Oh, well, then, I want to hear it.
你用不着听这首别听了
You don't need to hear it. Please don't.
♪ 我把所有事都搞砸了 ♪
♪ I fucked the whole thing up ♪
♪ 所有事都做反了 ♪
♪ I did it all backwards ♪
♪ 如今我只剩下我的说唱歌♥词 ♪
♪ Now I'm all alone with my rap verse ♪
♪ 我都没人分享密♥码♥ ♪
♪ I could barely share a password ♪
♪ 我邀请你一起跳舞却把你留在原地 ♪
♪ I said we'd dance, I left you there ♪
♪ 我把我也丢在了那里 ♪
♪ I left me there, too ♪
♪ 你支持着我我却反吐在你身上 ♪
♪ You had my back, I puked on you ♪
♪ 我疯狂追逐我的梦想却抓不到它 ♪
♪ I chased my dream so much it ran ♪
♪ 似乎离开了你的笑声我就没法讲笑话了 ♪
♪ I can't make jokes without your laugh, it seems ♪
♪ 我会不顾一切来博你一笑 ♪
♪ I'd do anything to melt you ♪
♪ 我把这一切都当作理所当然 ♪
♪ I took you for granted ♪
♪ 我会在你肚子上挠痒 ♪
♪ I'll give you belly rubs, too ♪
♪ 你喜欢兔子吗 ♪
♪ Did you like the rabbit? ♪
♪ 离开你让我痛苦十分 ♪
♪ It's killing me to kill you ♪
♪ 你曾是我的魔法 ♪
♪ And you were the magic ♪
♪ 但我把所有事都搞砸了 ♪
♪ But I fucked the whole thing up ♪
♪ 所有事都做反了 ♪
♪ I did it all backwards ♪
♪ 如今我只剩下我的说唱歌♥词 ♪
♪ Now I'm all alone with my rap verse ♪
♪ 在我最失落的时候你却对我最好 ♪
♪ You were the best at my worst ♪
♪ 我很想你艾丽 ♪
♪ And I miss you, Ally ♪
♪ 离开了你我不知所措 ♪
♪ I'm lost without you ♪
这首歌♥ 很棒戴维很棒
It's‐‐ That's good. Dave, that's good.
我是说它很不一样
I mean, it's different.
和你之前做的歌♥都不太一样 -没错
It's like nothing I've ever heard you make before. ‐ Yeah.
我都不知道你会写这种歌♥
I didn't know you even did stuff like that.
我...这不是利尔·迪基会唱的歌♥
I‐‐ It's not a Lil Dicky song.
这是我不... -没错这不是利尔·迪基的歌♥
It's‐‐ I don't... - No, it's not a Lil Dicky song
因为你一句也没提到你的鸡鸡
because you don't mention your penis the entire time.
你有试着做不一样的新的东西很棒啊
This is great to be different and to try new stuff.
我懂我也很高兴你喜欢它但这歌♥
I hear you, and I'm happy you like it, but it's
肯定和这专辑讲的故事不是一个类型
definitely not, like, the type of thing that's going on Penith.
是啊但这首歌♥应该放到这专辑里
Well, it should. It should be on the album,
因为它展现了你的成长
because you have to show growth.
这是个巨大的成长而且
And I think that's huge. And also,
听到你承认你还爱着艾丽挺感人的
it's nice to acknowledge that you're still in love with Ally.
我是说... -呃不
‐ I mean... ‐ Uh, no.
人们喜欢听分手情歌♥