儿童医院（2008）

Dori, do you have any theater training?
多莉 你有受过戏剧训练吗
I was a lesbian in college.
我大学是个蕾丝边
Good. What about you, Chet?
很好 那你呢 切特
Oh, well, I slept with a few girls in college
我在大学睡过一些女孩
but not enough to say that I'm a lesbian.
但不能说我是蕾丝边
Ooh! Well, that's quite a secret, Cat.
凯特 真是个秘密啊
And secrets can be revealing.
秘密可以被揭露
My old Nemesis.
我的死对头
I'll keep your secret, Cat,
凯特 我会保守你的秘密的
but you're gonna have to give me something in return.
但你得给我点回报
What?
什么
115 pounds of flesh... Yours, nude.
你52千克的肉...要裸的
Meet me in the barracks at 7:00.
七点营房♥见
That's a great plan, Sy!
希 这计划真不错
It's really fun.
很有趣啊
And the part about the hydraulics...
水力学那部分...
That is the perfect touch. Thanks.
真是太棒了 谢谢
Blake, I am so gonna need your help.
布莱克 我需要你的帮助
Yeah, yeah, I've been taking notes
好 我一直用谷歌♥文档
in a Google Doc this whole time. Hold on.
做笔记 稍等
Hy...
水
drau...
力
lics.
学
Chet, you wear that.
切特 你戴着这个
Cool! What part am I playing?
酷 我演什么
I have to save Cat from Jewy's clutches.
我得把凯特从朱轶的魔爪下解救出来
But not because I'm in love with her, because I'm not.
但不是因为我爱她 而是因为我不爱
Blake, are you busy right now?
布莱克 你现在很忙吗
Yeah, actually, I got a lot on my plate right now.
是啊 我现在有很多要做
I don't want to have to sleep with Jewy.
我不想和朱轶滚床单
But I don't want him to tell my secret.
但我又不想他到处说我的秘密
Obviously, my only option is to break out
显然 我唯一的出路就是涂上
my poison lipstick... What is she saying?
我的毒口红... 她说什么呢
The kind that only kills men, not women.
这种只杀男人不杀女人口红
What do you think, Blake?
你觉得呢 布莱克
Blake?
布莱克
Well, I hope Jewy likes...
希望朱轶会喜欢...
Blue? Really?
蓝色的 真的假的
Oh, my God. For real?
天啊 真的吗
This is just, like, a blue lipstick?
就是蓝色的唇膏
I have to get closer.
我得靠近点
Well, well, well. Look what we have here.
看谁来了
Hmm. Hello, Cat.
你好啊 凯特
Mm, blue lipstick with that eye shadow.
蓝口红配你的眼影
It's bold.
真大胆
Excuse me while I go
原谅我要去
and slip into something a little more comfortable.
做点事让我舒服一下
Oh, yes, I...
好啊 我...
imagine you'd want to relieve your bladder
猜你是想在我们激♥情♥之前
before we have intercourse, make you more comfortable...
释放一下你的膀胱 让你更爽...
Jewy McJewJew.
朱轶·迈克朱朱
Glenn Richie, my old Hebrew-school pal.
格伦·瑞奇 我希伯来学校的同学
You usually only have sex with the woman I'm in love with.
你通常只和我爱的女人上♥床♥
But Cat hates me, and I hate Cat.
但凯特讨厌我 我也讨厌凯特
What? Oh, sure.
什么 对啊
Yeah, we have regular public displays of hateful banter.
是啊 我们都在公众面前上演互相憎恶的戏码
Oh, well, Glenn,
格伦
is there anyone you are attracted to right now?
你现在有喜欢谁吗
I won't steal them from you.
我不是想抢她们
I'm just, uh, kind of curious. Guy talk, you know.
我只是有点好奇 随便聊聊 你懂得
Yeah, sure, sure.
是啊 懂
There is this one woman I had my eye on.
我心里是有一个人
She's in the play tonight. But you wouldn't like her.
她今晚演剧 但你不会喜欢她
She has the head of a donkey.
她头戴小毛驴
Oh, yeah, right. No, that's, uh, not my cup of tea.
是啊 那不是我爱的款
I might just check out that play, though, just for a smile.
我还是去看看那场剧 开心一下
Later, Glenn.
一会儿见 格伦
Here I come, rabbi!
我来啦 先生
Oh, I forgot.
我忘了
Jews only have sex through a ghost costume.
犹太人只穿着鬼服滚床单
But how will I kiss you?
但我怎么亲你啊
First, you must tell me how you truly feel about Glenn.
首先 你得告诉我你对格伦什么感觉
Oh! Just kiss me!
就亲我
Glenn!
格伦
Cat, your lips taste like crap.
凯特 你嘴唇尝上去就是一坨翔
No! Cat, I am so sorry I'm late!
别啊 凯特 抱歉我晚了
You probably called for me and I wasn't here,
你可能需要我 但我不在
and I apologize,
我道歉
but I have a lot of balls in the air right now.
但我真的很忙
But if I had been here,
如果我在这儿
I would've told you not to use the poison lipstick
我会告诉你别用毒口红
because you end up kissing Glenn. Glenn. I...
因为你最终会亲上格伦 格伦 我...
Oops. That is my fault.
糟了 是我的错
I am sorry. I will own that one.
真抱歉 这是我的责任
How did you know all this?
你怎么会知道的
Oh. Uh, earlier,
早些时候
I moved Val's wig a little bit
我把瓦珥的头套移了一点
and that set a whole series of things in motion.
然后才会有这一系列事的发生
I'm talking to people about it.
我和大家说了
I'm like, um, an omniscient narrator of sorts.
我就像全知叙述者那样
But, anyway, we have to get Glenn to Sy!
但 不管怎样 我们得把格伦带到希那里去
He's the only one with the antidote. Come on!
只有他有解药 快啊
But go get Glenn first. Okay, okay, yeah, no!
但先带上格伦啊 好的
Now is the winter of our discotheque!
现在我们舞厅到了冬天
Now is the perfect time to strike.
现在是袭击的最佳时机
Now's the time for my thing.
现在该我上场了
Val!
瓦珥
I wanted to make a grand gesture of sacrifice and commitment...
我做了一个惊人的牺牲承诺...
So I surgically removed my penis.
我动手术自宫了
Sy, it's Glenn!
希 格伦出事了
We need your help.
我们需要你的帮助
He's not well!
他很不好
Poison lipstick, huh? Yeah.
毒口红 是啊
I have the antidote, but I refuse to give it to you
我是有解药 但我拒绝给你
until Val stops trying to overthrow me.
除非瓦珥不再打算推♥翻♥我
I'll only agree to that
只有欧文重复刚刚说的话
if Owen repeats exactly what he said just a second ago.
我才会同意
What was that again?
你刚刚说什么来着
Uh...Well, I was...
我...
I, uh, surgically removed my penis because I love you.
我做手术自宫了 因为我爱你
Funny you should say that, because love...
真奇怪你会说这个 因为爱...
is the antidote.
就是解药
Glenn...
格伦...
I love you.
我爱你
That was my secret.
这就是我的秘密
And I love you, too.
我也爱你
I... Dingdong!
我... 叮咚
Hey! My grand gesture!
我的"壮举"
Stop that fairy! This is my dingdong.
拦下那个精灵 这个是我的了
Don't damage my penis!
别毁了我的大屌♥
Oh, my grand gesture!
我的"壮举"啊