儿童医院（2008）

Previously on "Childrens hospital"...
《儿童医院》前情提要
Guys!
伙计们
The power is out.
停电了
This is where the backup generator is,
备用电源在这个位置
but that's where most of the velociraptors are.
但这里是迅猛龙聚集的地方
This will teach us to play God.
这将教会我们如何扮演上帝
So I was like, "Lady,
我这么说的 "女士
if you think that horse AIDS isn't contagious,
如果你认为马类的艾滋病不具有传染性
you got another think coming -- horse AIDS!"
你随后肯定会惊呼 竟然是马类艾滋"
that's what I said to her!
我就是这么跟她说的
All right, guys,
好了 伙计们
I got to go do some computer stuff in another room,
我去那边房♥间用下电脑
but I'll see you later, all right?
晚点见 好吧
Okay.
好的
I love her stories about horse AIDS.
我喜欢听她讲关于马类艾滋的故事
Oh, yeah. She's gonna make a great mom someday.
是的 她一定会成为一名伟大的母亲
Yeah. I would make a great mom one day.
对 我会成为一个好妈妈的
This doesn't look too serious.
情况看起来不太严重
I'll just need to have a talk with your parents.
我需要跟你的父母谈一谈
They're not with us anymore.
他们不在了
I wouldn't want to sit in a hospital
换做是我也不会
waiting around for some kid, neither.
坐在医院里等小孩子的
No, they passed away.
不是因为这个 他们已经去世了
Oh!
天啦
It was a long time ago.
那是很久之前的事情了
Well, it must be kind of cool to be alone, huh?
独自一人生活应该很酷吧
You get to stay up late,
你可以熬夜
watch the Johnny Carson?
看强尼·卡森的《今夜秀》
I'm not alone.
我不是一个人
Jasper-pants is here in that chair.
酷酷贾斯博正坐在那张椅子上
He's invisible.
你们看不到他
You have an imaginary friend, huh?
你有一个想象中的朋友 对吗
Yeah. Okay.
对 好吧
Since he's here,
既然他也在这儿
why don't we take a look at Jasper-pants, as well?
不如我们也给酷酷贾斯博做个检查吧
Kid, we have a special ward where we
孩子 我们有一个特殊的病房♥
bring imaginary friends to make sure they're okay.
专门为想象中的朋友们准备的
We're taking him to the imaginary-friend ward,
我们现在带他去那个病房♥
which is totally a real thing.
这是真实存在的
Attention hospital staff -- tonight is your night.
全体医务人员请注意 今夜将属于你们
Believe in yourself.
相信你自己
Go out there and get her back.
过去把她带回来
Thank God kids are stupid enough
天啦 小孩们真够蠢的
to have imaginary friends, huh, guys?
竟然相信有想象中的朋友
Yeah. Yeah.
对 对啊
And I've been jonesing all day for a cigarillo.
我想抽支雪茄 都馋了一整天了
The 'rillos are hard to find.
雪茄可没那么好搞到
Where'd you get that, man?
你怎么搞到的 伙计
I know a guy.
我认识一个家伙
Japanese guy.
一个日本人
You say japanese? Yeah.
日本人吗 是的
Hi, buddy!
伙计
Look at him! Oh, dear. Oh.
看看他吧 亲爱的
Not good. What? What is it?
情况不太好 怎么回事儿
It looks like your baby is suffering from no-adoption-itis.
你的宝宝好像得了未被收养炎症
That's not even a real thing.
根本没有这回事儿
Yes, it's a very real thing.
当然有
You're gonna have to put him up for adoption.
你最好把他送给别人收养
What? We recommend that you give him to me.
什么 建议你把他送给我
Now, before you say no,
在你拒绝我之前
consider this -- I really want a baby.
请考虑下吧...我真的很想要个宝宝
Are you crazy?
你疯了吗
Am I crazy? Huh?
我疯了吗 好吧
You know what, lady?
你知道吗 女士
Yeah.
对
If wanting a baby more than anything in the world
没什么比有个宝宝更让我渴望的事了
because a co-worker offhandedly made a remark
因为我给同事们讲完马类艾滋的故事后
that you'd be a great mom
他们说我会成为一个好妈妈
after I told a story about horse AIDS makes me crazy,
如果这也算疯狂的话
then lock me up.
那请把我关起来吧
I'm crazy.
我确实疯了
Sure, I've never considered being a mom up until this morning,
在今天早上之前 我从没想过当母亲
but now it's one of the top five things that I think about,
但现在这已经是我最想做的五件事之一了
number one being fracking.
当然最想做的还是装傻
Okay.
好吧
Can you just tell me if my baby's okay so I can get out of here?
能直接告诉我宝宝健康吗 我要走了
Your baby has horse AIDS.
你的宝宝得了马类艾滋病
I had an imaginary friend when I was young.
我小时候也有一个想象中的朋友
His name was Steve Perry,
他叫史蒂夫·佩里
and he always said,
他总对我说
"Don't stop believing, Glenn."
"不要放弃信仰 格伦"
Steve Perry was lead singer of Journey.
史蒂夫·佩里是旅行乐队的主唱
He said "Don't stop believing" to everybody.
他对每个人都这样说
Yeah, but I imagined that he was my best friend and,
但是在我的想象中 他是我最好的朋友
with me, he always added "Glenn."
跟我说话时 他总是叫我"格伦"
Chief was my imaginary best friend.
我总把主任想象成最好的朋友
Yeah, that's right.
对 是这样的
Well, I had a bunch of imaginary friends,
好吧 我有一堆想象中的朋友
only they were real friends because I wasn't a loser.
但他们都是真实的 因为我不是个衰人
Okay, listen up, everybody.
好了 大家注意
I'm so sorry to tell you this, but we're going to shut down
很抱歉地通知大家 我们即将关闭
this kind of makeshift smoking hangout lounge.
这个临时的吸烟休息室
What?! Fascist! Fonzie!
什么 这简直是法♥西♥斯♥ 疯了吧
Because we're going to make it
因为我们马上要把它变成
into the official very comfortable smoking lounge.
一个非常舒适的专用吸烟休息室
Great! Capitalist! Love it.
太棒了 这才是共♥产♥主义 真好
Hey, I just read the news on the internet.
我刚刚在网上看到消息
They're shutting this place down?
这地方要关闭了吗
Yep, Sy finally realized the importance of smoking comfortably.
对 阿希终于意识到了悠闲吸烟的意义
Great.
真棒
Well, hooray for that news.
好吧 为这消息喝彩
Owen, my boy, you're back!
欧文 我的孩子 你回来了
Did you bring the steth-poop-a-scope I asked for?
你带了我要的听诊器吗
Here you go, Dr. Santa Claus.
在这儿 圣诞老人医生
Look, Dr. Santa Claus,
听着 圣诞老人医生
I can't help you anymore.
我再也帮不了你了
They're shutting this place down.
他们要关闭这里了
Where's everybody going to go?
那大家该去哪里呢
They need help!
他们需要帮助
Raggedy Paggedy broke her smile!
拉吉蒂·帕吉蒂摔坏了自己的微笑
Big-ben-burger's covered in ouchies!
大本博格疼得嗷嗷叫
Captain Beach-house's blood pressure is 60 over 40.
沙滩小屋船长的高压60 低压40
It's hard enough as it is.
这实在是太难办了
I'm the only doctor in the ward.
我是这间病房♥里唯一的医生
None of "Aar" kids had the "Faar" sight to "Staart"
我们的孩子没有远见
our names with "Daarctor."
去当一名医生
Only you did it, Owen,
除了你之外 欧文
because you're such a smart little boy.
你是一个如此聪明的小男孩
But I'm not a boy anymore, Dr. Santa Claus.
但我已经不是小男孩了 圣诞老人医生
Don't you get it?
你还不明白吗
That's only true if you decide it is.
除非你执意如此
All right.
好吧
All right.
好吧
I'll tell you what.
听我说
I'll help you cure these guys,
我来帮助你治好他们
but that's all I can do.
这是我唯一能做的了
Oh, thank you, Owen!
感谢你 欧文
Okay!
好吧
Attention hospital staff -- if you just be quiet for 30 seconds,
全体医务人员请注意 请安静三十秒
I can finish up.
让我读完