爸爸的好儿子（2012）

Hi, Mr. Peterson. What can I do for you?
嗨 彼得森先生 有什么能为您效劳的?
What room was my fiancee in again?
再问一下 我未婚妻在哪个房♥间?
Let me check. 6♥4♥1.
我查一下 6♥4♥1号♥
You're a fucking stud.
你真识相
Hey, when the legendary Donny Berger comes in here
嘿 要是传说中的东尼·伯杰来到这里
using a fake name, you go with it!
想用个假名字 就随他嘛!
All right, I will.
好啦 我记住了
6♥4♥1. 6♥4♥1.
6♥4♥1 6♥4♥1
All right, come on, sweetheart.
好的 来吧 甜心
Oh, yeah!
哦 耶!
What, did Todd come out here?
什么 托德来了吗?
You're half the size of Todd
你才有托德一半大
but you use it so much better!
可你的技术好太多了!
I guess not.
我猜不是吧
Oh. my God!
哦 我的天呐!
Oh, my God.
哦 我的天呐
Oh. my God!
哦 我的天呐
Oh, my God.
哦 我的天呐
Fucking shit!
妈的!
Fucking shit.
妈的
Fucking shit!
他妈的!
Fucking shit.
他妈的
Yeah. Okay.
哦 好的
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
哦 天呐 哦 天呐
Okay.
好的
Yeah!
爽!
You do not deserve these treats.
你不配吃这些雪糕
Are you finished, sweetheart?
你们完事了吗 甜心?
Oh, my God.
哦 我的天呐
Your fiance's at home, you know.
你的未婚夫正在家里呢 你知道的吧
This really gets me upset.
这真让我伤心
You know why?
知道为什么吗?
'Cause he's too good for you.
因为你根本配不上他
He is.
配不上
And you're sitting here gallivanting with...
而你现在放荡地坐在...
I think I know who.
我想我知道是谁
Don't I, Mr. Steve Goldstein?
是吧? 史蒂·金登先生
Wait. Are you...
等等 你是...
What am I seeing?
我看到什么了?
No... It...
不是... 这...
With each other?
你们两个?
Am I... This is...
我... 这是...
Is he your stepbrother at least
起码他得是你的继弟
or adopted or something?
或是收养什么的?
No reply.
不说话
So it's real.
所以是亲的了
Oh, my God.
哦 天呐
Donny, Donny, you don't...
东尼 东尼 你不...
You don't understand what's going on here.
你搞不懂
I don't think Charlie Sheen would understand what's going on here.
我觉得查理·辛也不会搞得懂
Look, I love Todd, and we're going to get married,
听着 我爱托德 我们马上就要结婚了
and we're going to have a great life together.
我们马上就要幸福地生活在一起
And yes, I've had sex with Chad from time to time.
确实 我不时地会和查得上♥床♥
It's what good-looking people do.
好看的人都这么做
They have sex with other good-looking people.
他们会跟其他好看的人上♥床♥
You know? Just so happens that
你懂吗? 只不过刚好
this one particular good-looking person is my little brother.
这个好看的人是我弟弟
Okay.
好吧
It's all making sense to me now.
这我就明白了
I know that sounded bad,
我知道这很不好
but, Donny, this was going to be the last time.
不过 东尼 这是最后一次了
I would never carry on with a married woman.
我绝不会去招惹已婚妇女的
I've got better morals than that, Donny.
我做人还是有下限的 东尼
Chad, adultery is bad,
查得 通奸是很不好
but incest is fucked up!
但乱♥伦♥才是变♥态♥
Please don't let him tell Mommy about our secret tickle time.
拜托别让他告诉妈妈秘密游戏时间的事啦
"Secret tickle time"?
"秘密游戏时间"?
You got a name for it?
你们还给它起了个名字?
And with a United States military man, no less.
居然还是跟一个美国♥军♥人
You are a disgrace to that uniform!
你真给那身制♥服♥丢脸
No, he's not a Marine.
不 他不是个海军
He buys those uniforms on eBay
那身制♥服♥他是从易趣上买♥♥的
so Dad doesn't find out he's a modern jazz dancer.
所以爸爸并不知道他是个跳现代爵士的
What?
什么?
That's possibly worse than the incest thing.
这可能比乱♥伦♥的事情还要过分
This is an abomination. I'm telling Todd.
这真恶心 我要告诉托德
No, he won't believe you.
不 他不会相信你的
Yeah, he will.
不 他会信的
No, he bought that Steve Goldstein story.
不 他连史蒂·金登的事都是信我的
Come on, you think he got that partnership on his own?
得了吧 你以为他是靠自己成为合伙人的吗?
With that "beep boop beep" shit?
用那些"哔卟哔卟"的玩意吗?
No, I gave him a boost.
当然不是 我帮了他一把
How many people have you fucked?
你到底和多少人上过床?
Well, maybe he'll believe this.
好吧 或许他会相信这个
Nice. Save.
很好 保存
You two have fun together.
你们两个继续快活吧
Sickies.
变♥态♥
All right, how much?
好吧 你要多少?
I'm going to be a very rich woman.
我马上要变成非常有钱的人
I can write you a big fat check.
我可以给你开一张大额支票
What's it going to take for this to go away?
这事宣扬出去之后会怎样?
Todd has to pop a Xanax when he loses a contact lens.
托德丢副隐形眼镜就要吃阿普唑仓
What do you think he's going to do when he finds out about this?
你觉得他发现这件事情后会怎么样?
Todd's happy.
托德的快乐
You really want to take that away?
你真的想夺走吗?
Hey, buddy.
嘿 兄弟
I got something to tell you, and...
我有些话想告诉你
I'm not expecting you to believe this, but...
我没指望你相信我 但是...
I got the money.
我已经弄到钱了
That's great, Donny.
那太好了 东尼
Your son came through for you, didn't he?
你儿子帮助了你 是吗?
Yeah. His fiancee gave me $50, 000
是的 他未婚妻给了我五万块
to keep quiet about her having sex with her brother.
条件是对她和她弟弟上♥床♥的事情守口如瓶
Yeah, I've been there.
啊 我也经历过
We've all been there.
我们都经历过了
She said it was her last time, so...
她说那是最后一次了 所以...
Maybe things will work out.
也许事情会变好的
Then how come I feel like shit right now?
可我现在为什么感觉这么糟?
Yeah, it's kind of a moral thicket.
是啊 有点道德混乱吧
But the good news is
但好消息是
you stay out of the slammer, right, Donny?
你不用进监狱了是吧 东尼?
Donny?
东尼?
"Go do something. "
做点什么吧
I don't know, Mr. Mitty.
不知道啦 米帝先生
I don't know if I can fucking handle it.
我不知道我能不能处理好这事儿
"Be a good person. "
做你认为正确的事
Donny?
东尼?
No, no, don't hit me. No, no.
不不不 别打我 不是 不是
Just give me a moment, please, Todd.
请给我一点时间 托德
Just a moment. Relax.
就一会儿 放松点
You know, after praying with the monsignor,
要知道 在跟主教祷告过之后
I realize that I committed the sin of prideful anger in the church
我意识到我在教堂里犯了自大的罪过
and I hope that you'll accept my apology
并希望你能接受我的歉意
and allow me the honor of being a part of this joyous day.
还有允许我参与这愉悦的一天
Well, what about Father Shakalu?
好吧 那夏葫芦神父呢?
Stupid bird.
死笨鸟
Come on, fly!
拜托 飞啊!
Well, he's cool.
他不介意的
Great. Sounds good.
很好 不错
By the way, Todd
顺便问一下 托德