吸血鬼生活

What We Do in the Shadows S02E10

Part 2 June 21, 2020, 10:46 a.m.

是吸血鬼新艺剧院寄来的
It is from the Nouveau Théatre des Vampires.
邀请我们所有人
And we have all been invited!
-太好了 -棒
- Yes! - Yeah.
吸血鬼新艺剧院
The Nouveau Théatre des Vampires is
吸血鬼新艺剧院
-非常了不起 -他们每五年
- a very, very big deal. - They travel from Europe
会从欧洲来一次美国
to the United States once every five years.
只有吸血鬼社会中精华中的精华
And only the crème de la crème de la creams of vampire society
才会被邀请
is invited.
这是我们第一年参加
This is the first year we have made the cut.
每一个看过的人都说非常精彩
Everyone who has seen it says it is magnificent.
所有演员都是吸血鬼
It is an all-vampire cast
节目无比美妙
and it is just the most beautiful,
神秘激烈有深度
eerie, poignant, important,
-非常了不起 -我听说会有很多裸体
- important work. - And I've heard there's a lot of nudity.
绝对是很多我所说的很多
And I mean a lot, and when I say a lot,
可不是露个奶♥子♥ 而是直接全♥裸♥
I don't just mean a whiff of tit, I mean the full rack.
奶♥子♥全露屌♥也是
Full boobies, full boners.
全部展出
The full display.
我们肯定会玩得很开心
We're going to have so much fun.
我
I am
能被邀请我真是太开心了
so G-damn excited to be going to the vampire theater.
有些展示出来的生殖器会让人类惊诧
There's some genitalia on show there that would make a human
"那到底是什么"
go, "What is that exactly?"
所以我们能参加非常荣幸
So we shall be honored to attend.
等等
Wait.
我们在想什么我们都没衣服穿
What are we thinking? We don't have any clothes!
都脏了我们不能穿成这样去
They are all soiled. We cannot go dressed like this.
她说得对不能穿成这样去
She's right. We can't go dressed like this.
肯定会被嘲笑死的
We'll be laughed out of the place.
他们根本不会放我们进去
They're not going to let us in now.
-该死的 -靠
- Goddamn it! - Damn!
等等别这样
Wait, stop, guys, stop.
-我真的要这样做吗 -哪样做
- Am I really gonna do this? - Do what?
听我说
Listen.
我有办法帮你们搞定衣服的事
There is a way to get your clothes back.
别问我为什么你们不会想知道的
Don't ask me how. You don't want to know.
我很有可能会...
There's a good chance that I'm...
不能活着回来
not even gonna make it back alive.
你是说你可能会被杀死吗柯林·鲁宾逊
You mean you might be killed, Colin Robinson?
我们不希望你受伤
We don't want you to hurt yourself.
我他妈也不想啊
Me neither, damn it.
但是如果我帮你们这一次
But if I do this kindness for you,
我能不能要点回报
can I ask for one in return?
什么都可以想要什么
Anything. What is it?
我真的很想搬出我地下室的那间房♥间
I'd really like to move out of my room in the basement.
如果你把我们的衣服拿回来你就直接搬进我房♥间去
If you retrieve our clothes, you can move into my room.
不不我不想要你的房♥间
Oh, no, no, no. I don't want your room.
我只想搬进地下室的另一间房♥间
I-I just want to move into that other room in the basement.
-听起来不错 -真的吗
- Sounds fair. - Really?
去吧现在就搬去
Go ahead. Do that now.
看来我们要去剧院啦
I guess we're going to the Théatre!
所以其实我还是得去趟干洗店
So, basically I needed to go to the dry cleaners anyway.
我只是不想让他们觉得这挺容易的
I just didn't want to make it sound too easy for them,
因为你偶尔去个一两次
'cause you go once or twice and then,
突然之间你就变成大家的干洗取衣奴了
all of a sudden you're the go-to dry cleaning fetcher.
柯林·鲁宾逊再次赢得胜利
Colin Robinson wins again.
纽约布朗克斯区
对所以我不得不...
Yeah, so I had to...
吉尔莫
前任亲信
我得离开那儿所以...
I had to get out of there, so...
妈妈妈妈
?Mamá? Mamá.
妈妈
?Mamá!
-你在拍电影 -对
- Ah, tu película. - Sí.
好啦
Okay.
我家冰箱今天坏了所以...
Our fridge broke today, so...
但是对的我必须离开那里
But, yeah, I had to get out of there.
别担心我有可能变成吸血鬼杀手
Never mind that I'm prone to being a vampire slayer.
我去杀吸血鬼
I'm, like, killing vampires,
亚伯拉罕·范海辛
杀杀杀大杀特杀
killing, killing, killing, killing,
同时还想着变成吸血鬼
but also wanting to be a vampire?
我只是得好好想想那事儿
I just had to think about that and also
还有照顾下日常事宜
manage my everyday duties,
但我常常半途而废因为无法集中精神
which were falling at the wayside because I wasn't focused.
就这样这就是我现在的生活
This is it. This is my life now.
你知道我对此很满意
You know? And I'm happy with that.
我挺充实的
I'm content.
她很高兴我回家了
She's happy that I'm home.
被人渴望的感觉真好
It's good to be wanted.
我确实很想念他们非常想念
And I do miss them. I miss them a lot.
稍等一下
I'll be right back.
我有一台迷你冰箱
Okay, y-yo tengo un mini-fridge.
或者说我曾有个迷你冰箱事实上
Or I had a mini-fridge. Well, actually,
是我朋友托佛的但他现在死了
it's my friend Topher's, but, you know, he's dead now.
对那个可怜的孩子
Ay, pobrecito.
不对不起不
No, sorry, no.
他之前就死了我去拿
He was dead. I-I'll go get it.
斯坦顿岛
Staten Island.
吸血鬼新艺剧院
秘密入口好酷
Secret entrance. Very cool.
真高兴你们能加入我们
So glad you could join us.
-我不喜欢我们的座位位置 -你都还没进去
- I don't like our seats. - You haven't seen them.
-我不喜欢座位 -快进去
- I don't like seats. - Get in there.
-这是你的媒体通行证 -谢谢
- And here are your media passes. - Thanks.
确保要时刻戴在身上
Make sure you keep them on you at all times.
我们等了五百年才收到邀请
We've waited 500 years for an invite to this, you know?
我们本应该来更多次的但是...
We should have been to many more, but...
-你这不是来了 -我们来了
- Well, here you are now. - Here we are now.
这边请先生
Right this way, sir.
非常感谢你晚上好
Thank you very much. Good evening.
-晚上好 -非常棒的位置
- Good evening. - Ooh, very nice seats.
我确实这么认为
I should damn well think so.
我想我肯定坐前排
"I guess I must be in the front row."
不你跟我们坐一起
No, you're sitting here with us.
不那是80年代广♥告♥里的鲍勃·优克
No, it's Bob Uecker, from a commercial in the '80s.
他是密尔瓦基酿酒人队的解说
He was the Milwaukee Brewers announcer...
一个很棒的趣闻
A wonderful anecdote.
斯坦顿岛
我们很快就出来所以不会尴尬
We should be in and out, so it's not gonna be weird.
有人吗
Hello?
要是气氛变尴尬了我会给你们信♥号♥♥
If it gets uncomfortable, I'll just give you a signal.
我的眼睛会这样
I'll just do eyes like that.
有人吗
Hello?
娜嘉拉兹洛
Nadja? Laszlo?
主南多
Mas... Nandor?
柯林·鲁宾逊
Colin Robinson?
-大家人呢 -你好
- Where is everyone? - Hello.
你吓到我了
You scared me.
你太胆小了
You scare easy.
-他们就知道你会回来 -大家人呢
- They knew you'd be back. - Where is everyone?
-他们出去了 -出去
- They went out. - Out? Wow.
-去哪了 -剧院
- Where did they go? - To the Théatre.
他们不带你玩得可开心了
They're having a great life without you.
邀请函在那边如果你不信我的话
The invitation is over there if you don't believe me.
很高级的活动
Very exclusive event.
诚挚邀请你来吸血鬼新艺剧院
"You're cordially invited to the Nouveau Théatre des Vampires..."
是法语
That's French.
就像是剧院能看到吗
It's like a theater. Do you see that?
那有个人吊着很聪明
There's a guy hanging. It's pretty clever, it's...
天这上面的图真是
Geez, the work on this is so...
那是那看上去像是
Is that...? Does that look like a...?
是吸血鬼议会