吸血鬼生活

What We Do in the Shadows S02E07

Part 2 June 21, 2020, 10:46 a.m.

And to reiterate, do not eat.
-如果可以的话 -你们怎么抗拒的
- If possible. - How do you resist?
一开始很难抗拒
Well, it used to be difficult to resist,
但是后来你就会开始想
but after a while, you start to wonder
为什么一直没人吃他
why hasn't anyone eaten him?
他就像是展柜里最后一个甜甜圈
He's like the last doughnut in the display cabinet.
卡罗尔卡罗尔
Carol. Carol!
别吃他有毛病
Do not eat. Something wrong.
起来起来起来
Up, up, up, up, up, up, up.
你想带卡罗尔去看看你房♥间吗
You want to show Carol your room?
不了我觉得她不会喜欢
No. I don't think she'd like that.
你想去看看吉尔莫的房♥间吗
Would you like to see Guillermo's room?
她一进房♥间就会把他吃了的
She's going to eat him if she goes to the room.
好吧那还是算了
Okay, probably better not.
我们在下面留了多余的棺材
We keep spare coffins down here.
如果你们足够幸运应该能找到
There might be something, if you're lucky.
这边请
Come this way.
那真是太感谢了
Oh, that would be so kind.
你好埃尔维斯
Hello, Elvis.
我在70年代时把他变成了吸血鬼
I made him into a vampire back in the 1970s.
他有时候会用这个房♥间
He sometimes uses this room,
如大家所见他在录音乐
which you can see, he's doing some recording.
-所以我们最好... -猫王您好
- So it's probably best if we... - Hello, The King.
回楼梯上去吧
Yeah, yes. Back up the stairs.
-抱歉埃尔维斯 -没事
- Sorry, Elvis. - It's all right.
*喝着那些血液宝贝*
*Drinking that big ol' blood, baby*
我们哪里都能睡
Really, we'll sleep anywhere.
房♥梁上也可以我可以用废旧的木板
In the rafters. I could construct a makeshift coffin
做一个临时棺材
out of discarded planks.
说真的你是个真朋友
Uh, honestly, you are just such a true friend.
我们看到西蒙这么苍老虚弱很难受
It is very sad to see Simon so decrepit and weak.
不难受
No, it's not.
他是该吃点苦头了
It's about time he ate shit.
部分是我们的错
It's partially our fault.
因为你那个该死的被诅咒的帽子
Because of your bloody cursed, stupid hat.
把他都毁了
It's ruined him.
那个帽子会逼疯很多人
That thing makes men go crazy.
我们再也不用担心了
Well, we needn't worry about that anymore.
我们不知道帽子在哪里
We don't know where the hat is.
-对吧 -是的正是
- Right? - Well, exactly. Exactly.
帽子已经消失了所以我们不必担心
The hat is gone, so we don't need to worry about it.
-谢天谢地 -是啊
- Thank goodness. - Yep.
有一个人类呆瓜
There's some kind of human nerd
让大家无视我
who is telling people to ignore me.
他会时不时搞得我账户被封
I mean, he's getting my accounts suspended left and right.
我绝对忍♥不了
This will not stand.
他简直是断我的口粮
I mean, he's stealing my food now.
他刚跟人们说我住在我妈妈的地下室里
He just told people that I live in my mother's basement.
"你错了
"Actually,
我住在我自己的地下室里蠢货"
I live in my own basement, dumbass."
发射
Fire.
不行他惹火我了
Oh, no. H- He's getting to me.
狡诈者西蒙他以为我不知道他要干什么
Simon the Devious, he thinks I don't know what he's up to,
但我知道
but I do.
他去了
There he goes.
跟我来快点
Follow me. Quick, quick, quick, quick.
你看他要跑了
Look. Running away.
他只是来偷我的帽子
Ah... He's only here to steal my hat.
我抓到你了
I got you.
他进了地窖
He's gone into the cellar.
我们得抓他个现行
We need to catch him in the act.
找到你了
There you are!
游戏结束了老伙计
The game's up, old chum.
从纽约那次见面以来你一直没有变
Nothing's changed since New York City.
我不知道你在说什么
I don't know what you're talking about...
老实说你这个自大的混♥蛋♥
Really, you smug bastard?
你背后藏着什么
What's behind your back?
只是绳子我觉得
Just the rope, I think.
给我看看
Show me.
-去大厅 -拉兹洛我
‐ Get in the hall. ‐ Laszlo, I...
-什么情况 -大家都下来
‐ What's going on? ‐ Everyone come down.
这就是个误会
Th‐There's been a misunderstanding.
-怎么回事这是什么 -这
‐ What is it? What is it? ‐ This.
-这是个贼 -贼把手砍了
‐ This thief. ‐ Thief? Chop his hands off.
别让他难堪
Don't embarrass him.
拉兹洛亲爱的他得不到我
Laszlo, my love. He's not gonna get me.
我是你的宝贝冷静
I'm yours, baby. Chill out.
-我永远是你的 -现在把布揭开
‐ I'm yours forever. ‐ Uncover that now.
我我真的不想这么做如果可能
I‐I'd really prefer not to, if possible.
是的我想你也不想
Yeah, I bet you wouldn't.
看看吧
Well, look at that.
很漂亮非常
Lovely. Very...
非常酷
Very cool.
-漂亮极了 -这他妈是什么
- Gorgeous. ‐ What the fuck is it?
是啊这是什么
Yes, what is it?
这是一个蝙蝠
It's a bat.
我从下水道垃圾里就地取材做的
I made it myself from sewer trash.
这是一份向你们表达感谢的小礼物
It's just a small gift to say thank you
谢谢你们收留我和我仅存的队员
for allowing me and my reduced crew to stay with you.
我只是想感谢你们没有抛弃我
I just wanted to say thank you for not abandoning me
而别人都抛弃了我
When everyone else had.
西蒙你不用说了
Simon, you don't need to say any more.
真是太悲伤了也很有爱
That is so pathetic and truly lovely.
谢谢
Thank you.
对不起
Well, I'm sorry.
你说什么
What was that?
我说对不起
I said I'm sorry.
我没太听清
Couldn't quite hear that.
不我也没听清
No, I couldn't hear it, either.
我说对不起
I said I'm sorry.
好消息是你的手保住了
Well, the good news is you get to keep your hands.
大家都睡了所以
Everyone's asleep, so...
你们知道的我获得了片刻的宁静
you know, I get a little bit of peace and quiet‐‐
操
?Chinga!
她吓到我了
She startled me.
该死
?Mierda!
嗨卡罗尔
Hey, Carol.
我知道你是什么
I know what you are.
希望不是午餐
Hopefully not lunch.
主人
Master?
你是个猎手
You are a slayer.
什么你为什么那么说我不是
What? Why did you say that? I‐‐ No.
我在你身上闻到了死亡的气息
I smell the death on you.
那那只是我的体香剂是斧头牌的
Oh, that, that's just my body spray. It's Axe.
吸血鬼杀手
Killer of vampires.
卡罗尔别说了好吗
Carol, stop saying that, okay?
我会像你一样变成个吸血鬼的
I'm gonna be a vampire just like you.
听上去像
Sounded like
吉尔莫刚从楼梯上滚下去了
Guillermo just took a tumble down the steps.
或许我应该
Maybe I should, uh...
蠢货
F... Asshole.
"如果我的阴♥茎♥是根铅笔
"If my dick is a pencil,
那我为什么还要用键盘打字"
then why am I using a keyboard to write?"
发射
Fire.
你真强壮
Oh, wow. You're really strong.
让我印象深刻
I'm really impressed.
猎手
Slayer.
别这么叫我
Don't call me that.
猎手
Slayer.
猎手
Slayer...
我感觉不太好