新贵（2016）

I'm just, like, aghast.
我不可能说出句句箴言 这需要不断修改
Look, they can't all be gold. It's work in progress.
老婆 别这样
Wife, please,
我是一名忠诚的丈夫
I am a true and faithful husband.
没有人能比得上你毛茸茸的洞穴...
No other tufted lady grotto than thine...
...对于那些带着紫头盔的陌生人
... hath given good shelter
它很好地隐蔽了自己...
to the stranger in the purple helm that doth...
那些陌生人进去的时候笔直强壮
.. that doth enter upstanding strong
离开的时候疲软萎缩
but departs a limp and shrunken weakling.
我简直要吐了
I am actually going to be sick.
我必须躺一会儿
I shall certainly have to have a lie-down.
和我结婚的人是你
I be married to thee.
你是和我结婚了
You're married to me,
但是却给别的贱女人写诗
but you're writing poems about some stinksome whore-slap!
还有美少年
And the Fair Youth.
别忘了那个美少年
Don't forget the Fair Youth.
是的 爸爸 也太奇怪了吧
Yeah, Dad, that is pretty weird.
而且还很危险 儿子 法律可是有规定的
And dangerous. There's laws, son.
那个美少年只是一个普通朋友而已
The Fair Youth is just a pal.
好吧...
Look...
我承认 我在伦敦时目睹了一些美好的事物
I admit that while in London seen and admired have I
并爱慕那些美好的体验
many dainties of beauty and experience
在空闲时 也许还写了
and perhaps did idly pen
一些关于他们的晦涩难懂的诗篇
some obscure and somewhat impenetrable verse about them.
但是我对你是忠诚的
But I be faithful to thee.
好吧...
Well...
... 也许是 也许不是
... maybe you are and maybe you aren't.
但是我现在不想和一个
But I shan't share my bed
爱慕着美少年和黑女郎的男人
with someone who is thinking about Fair Youths
同床共枕
and Dark Ladies.
所以在你想清楚之前
So until you sort yourself out,
要么去牛棚和哞哞夫人睡
you can either sleep in the cowshed with Mrs Moo-Moo
要么就滚回伦敦去
or you can sod off back to London.
因为现在我讨厌你
Because I don't like you
灰常十分讨厌你 威廉·莎士比亚
very much at the moment, Will Shakespeare.
我一点也不喜欢你
I don't like you very much at all.
你想到这里面来吗?
Do you want to get in here?
哦 不...
Oh, no...
你的脖子已经在里面了
you're already up to your neck in it.
红狮戏院
"我可以把你比作夏日吗? "
"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"
- 哦 我真的觉得这句话很美 - 是的
- Oh, I do think that's pretty. - Yes.
这个画面真美
Such a lovely image of
每个人的爱情就像是八月美丽的破晓
one's love like a beauteous August morn.
是的 新鲜的 火花四溅 充满阳光
Yes. Fresh, sparkling, sun-drenched.
嗯 是的 除非下雨了
Hm, yeah, unless it's raining.
"我可以说你有一点湿了吗? " 哼!
"Shall I say you're a bit wet and soggy?" Hmm!
浪漫? 我不这么想
Romantic? Don't think so.
停止那样做 肯普
Do stop doing that, Kempe.
什么? 停止做什么?
What? Stop what?
变得才华横溢?
Being brilliant?
不能 "为什么? "
Can't. "Why?"
因为我就是这么有才华
Cos I am brilliant.
那个... 那个... 笑声
That... That... laugh.
你总是不停地这么做 现在 停下来!
You keep doing it all the time. Now, stop it!
是的 让我听得牙直痒痒
Yes, it doth rattle me to my very teeth.
哦 是的 笑声
Oh, right, yeah, the laugh.
听着 事情是这样的...
See, the thing is...
我随处都能看到喜剧 懂吗?
I see comedy everywhere, yeah?
我所涉及的层面
I get stuff
你们都还没开始了解 所以...
you couldn't even begin to get, so...
我十分了解喜剧 谢谢你
I understand comedy very well, thank you.
哼 哼!相当了解 伯比奇 相当
Hm-hmm! Quite well, Burbage, quite.
但是如果你像我一样是一个天才
But if you're a genius, like me,
就会发现还有另一个层面 所以...
there's another level, so...
另一个层面 肯普?
Another level, Kempe?
是的 我能看到喜剧的深意 懂吗?
Yeah. I see deep comedy, yeah?
比如下面 "哦 这有点好玩" 以及...
Beneath the, "Ooh, it's a bit funny," And beyond...
只有我能体会到隐晦的有趣的喜剧
to the secret, very funny comedy only I get.
这就是我为什么频繁地
That's why I do
发出令人讨厌的笑声 懂吗?
my massively annoying laugh, yeah?
告诉你一个窍门 这对表演很用 真的
To let you in on it. It's a bit of a favour, really.
现在 在我去找艾米利亚夫人之前
Now, before I go to Lady Emelia's,
我需要你的帮助 凯特
I wanted your help, Kate.
我现在急需你独特的女性思维的洞察力
I'm in urgent need of your unique insight into the feminine mind.
我正在寻找只有一个女人才能传达给
I'm looking for the understanding that only one woman
另一个女人的感情思想
can bring to the feelings of another.
哦...
Oh...
我的...
my...
天哪!
God!
谢谢你!
Thank you!
谢谢你 谢谢你!
Thank you. Thank you!
谢谢你
Thank you.
什么?
Pardon?
你终于让我饰演你的朱丽叶了!
You're finally going to let me be your Juliet!
别胡说八道 小姑娘 你怎么会有这种想法?
Don't be ridiculous, girl. Whatever gave you that idea?
当你说拜托我
When you begged
运用我独特的女性思维时 我...
use of my unique feminine understanding, I...
... 自然而然地认为...
... naturally presumed...
自然而然地认为? 天哪 小姑娘!
Naturally presumed? God's bodikins, girl!
真是胡说八道!
What nonsense!
我知道我们讨论过这个想法 但是我再三思考
I know we've discussed the idea, but the more I think about it,
再三发现 要有说服力地
the more I see that what is required
在舞台上扮演一个女人所需要的
to convincingly portray a woman on stage
不是女性思维或者少女的洞察力
is not feminine understanding or girlish insight,
而是吱吱响的声音 撅起的嘴唇
it's a squeaky voice, pouty lips
和两个半个椰子的假胸
and a couple of half-coconuts.
我只是真的...
I just really...
真的觉得一个真正的女孩来演朱丽叶
really feel that an actual girl
会更令人信服
would be more convincing.
另外 这是我的梦想
Plus, it's my dream.
凯特 现实点吧
Kate, be realistic.
法律规定女人不能上学
The law states that a woman may not attend university,
拥有职业
take a profession,
担任公职或拥有自己的财产
hold public office or own property.
根据法律规定 男人比女人优等
Men are better than women, by law.
确实如此
Exactly.
因此这意味着
It therefore follows that
男人们更擅长扮演女人
they must even be better at being women.
好吧 这很明显
Well, that's just obvious.
现在 拜托了
Now, please,
忘记你这些想要成为演员的愚蠢打算
forget these silly notions of becoming an actor
然后听我说 我需要建议
and attend to me. I need advice.
建议?
Advice?
基♥督♥教♥徒♥中没有男人可以信赖的吗?
Be there no men left in Christendom to confide in?
即使其中最无知的人
Surely even the most ignorant
也一定比我更适合成为圣人
would be a better oracle than I,
尽管我读的是拉丁文版的...
who, though I read Virgil and Cicero...
维♥吾♥尔和西塞罗的作品...
in Latin...
没有掉书袋子
have no cod-dangle,
这显然是集所有智慧为一体的文字
which clearly be the font of all wisdom!
凯特...
Kate...
为你自己好 识相一点
Do yourself a favour. Wind in Mrs Smartarse.
男人无法忍♥受过于聪明的女人
Blokes can't stand clever birds.
能听我说了吗?
Can we focus?
我的老婆安娜非常生我的气
My wife Anne is very angry with me
因为我写的一百五十四首情诗的对象不是她
because I've written 154 love poems to people who are not her.
天哪 女人! 我是说 她们总是那么敏感
God. Women! I mean, they're so bloody sensitive.
我懂 我懂
I know. I know.
重点是 凯特 我怎么样才能弥补我的过错?
The point is, Kate, how can I put it right?
这个...
Well...