英村脑残故事（2017）

"But unfortunately, you're going to have to talk like this...
"但是不幸地 你得这样说话了"
"..For the rest of your life."
"在你的余生里"
But then, he got a job doing voices on cartoons.
但后来 他找到了一份工作 给动画片配音
He's made a massive success out of himself.
他取得了巨大的成功
So it just goes to show,
所以这就说明了
you can be anything you want to be, really,
你可以成为任何你想成为的人 真的
if you put your mind to it.
如果你用心去做的话
Kerry Mucklowe?
Kerry Mucklowe
Is this your lock-up?
这是你的车♥库♥吗
I don't think it is, no.
我不认为是 不是的
It's registered in your name.
它是以你的名义注册的
Well, it could be. Because, I mean, nobody tells me anything.
嗯 可能是 因为 我是说 没人告诉我任何事
Shall we go down to the station, sort this out?
我们去警局 把这件事解决好吗
Well, you can if you want, I'm probably just going to head back.
好吧 如果你想的话你可以去 我可能就要回去了
Can you get in the car, please?
你能上车吗
Are you asking me? Or are you...?
你在询问我吗 还是你
I’m telling you. Telling me? Yep.
我是在告诉你 告诉我 好吧
This car, is it? Yep, that's the one. Yeah?
这辆车 是吧 是的 这辆 好吧
I'll see you later.
我们待会儿见
Anyone here lost a hearing aid?
谁丢了一个助听器吗
No?
没人吗
No-one's going to claim this, and it goes straight in the bin.
没有人认领这个 它直接进垃圾桶了
For lost property, my policy is the ten-second rule.
对于丢失的财产 我的政策是十秒规则
Right, in the bin it goes.
好 扔进垃圾桶
If it's not claimed after ten seconds, just dump it in the...
如果十秒后没人认领 就把它扔到
Kerry's mum. What does she want?
Kerry的妈妈 她想干嘛
What have I done? Fuck it, I'll answer anyway.
我做过什么 妈的 我还是接吧
Hello?
你好
Hello?
你好
Are you all right?
你还好吗
Hello, can you hear me now?
你好 你能听到我吗
Well, you rang me!
你打给我的
Yeah, what is it?
对 怎么了
Yeah?
嗯
Oh, shit...
噢 糟了
Why?
为什么
Why?
为什么
oh fuck
噢 我去
Martin. I said it was dodgy, didn't I?
Martin 我说过这很可疑 不是吗
All right, yeah, all right.
好吧 好吧
I'd better go, then.
那我最好去一趟
I'd better go then, Sue!
我最好去一趟 Sue
I'm just saying I'd better go, then!
我刚才说我最好去一趟
Yeah, the connection's bad, it's fine!
对 信♥号♥♥太差了 没事的
OK? All right!
好吗 好的
Yeah, I'll let you go.
对 我要挂电♥话♥了
All right?
好吗
Hello, I said I'm going to go!
喂 我说我要电♥话♥了
Fuck. Martin, yeah.
妈的 Martin
I said it. I said it from the start it was dodgy.
我就说 我就说从一开始就很可疑
It just whiffed of dodgy. I bet...
只是有点诡诈 我打赌
Fuck's sake...
卧♥槽♥
Yeah?
嗯
Hello?
喂
Yeah, you all right?
嗯 你还好吗
Hello?
你好
Right.
好吧
Yeah. Fuck it. I'd better go and call Rebecca.
嗯 妈的 我最好去打电♥话♥给Rebecca
Give me two seconds, yeah?
给我一小会 好吗
OK, Kerry. Thanks for coming in.
好了 Kerry 谢谢你能来
Just to confirm that you've been cautioned
只是为了确认你被提醒过
and are entitled to free legal advice, which you've declined.
有权获得免费的法律咨♥询♥ 你拒绝了
Can I ask why? Because I ain't doing anything wrong.
我能问问为什么吗 因为我没做错任何事
Can I say, as my human right,
我可以说一句吗 作为我的人♥权♥
you have not asked me if I want a glass of water.
你没有问我要不要一杯水
And I'm legally entitled to that as well.
并且我在法律上也有这个权利
OK, would you like a glass of water?
好吧 那你想要一杯水吗
No. But thank you for asking me.
不了 但是谢谢你问我
That is correct conduct.
这才是正确的行为
OK, So...
好吧 所以
We have evidence to suggest that your father, Martin Mucklowe,
我们有证据表明你的爸爸 Martin Mucklowe
has been involved in the transportation and storage
参与运输和储存
of stolen goods from a factory in Malmesbury.
从马尔梅斯伯里一家工厂偷来的东西
And it's our belief that
并且我们认为
he's been using you to store them in a lock-up
他一直在利用你把东西存放在车♥库♥里
rented out in your name.
以你的名义租的车♥库♥
No, because they weren't stolen.
不对 因为它们不是被偷的
They had been thrown away.
它们是被扔掉的
It's like, you know the tea rooms in town,
就像 你知道镇上的茶室
where if they can't sell all their paninis in the day,
那里如果他们不能在白天卖♥♥掉所有的帕尼尼
they just put it in a bin bag
他们就把剩下的放在垃圾袋里
and they put it outside the shop for the homeless, and the foxes,
他们把它放在商店外面给无家可归的人和狐狸
and sometimes badgers get in there...?
有时候獾也会过去
OK, Kerry. I need you to appreciate
好了 Kerry 我需要你理解
the significance of this situation, OK?
情况的严重性 好吗
Yeah, but also, have you ever seen The Raggy Dolls on the CBBC?
是啊 但你看过CBBC频道上的狂暴娃娃吗
Because that's very similar.
因为这很相似
The dolls, if they're not in full working order,
那些娃娃 如果他们没有经过完整工序
like, their arms and their legs and that,
比如 他们的胳膊和腿
they should have all their limbs,
他们应该拥有所有的四肢
and these don't have their limbs,
还有那些没有四肢
so they get thrown away into a thing.
所以他们被扔进了一个东西里
And that's very similar to the hoovers.
这和吸尘器非常相似
Because the hoovers are very much like the dolls.
因为那些吸尘器很像玩偶
Because they also want to find loving homes.
因为他们也想找到有爱的家
Look, I know you're trying to protect your dad,
听着 我知道你在试着保护你的爸爸
but you have to tell us the truth.
但是你必须告诉我们真♥相♥
I am telling the truth. My dad is not a criminal.
我正在告诉你们真♥相♥ 我爸爸不是罪犯
When I think of Kerry Mucklowe,
当我想起Kerry Mucklowe时
I think of someone who is very loyal.
我想到一个非常忠诚的人
And very, very stupid.
但是非常 非常的愚蠢
More stupid than loyal.
跟忠诚相比更愚蠢
Sort of 70% stupid, 30% loyal, probably.
大概是70%的愚蠢 30%的忠诚
Because she's very loyal.
因为她非常忠诚
But extremely stupid.
但是极度愚蠢
Bored! Yep.
无聊 是的
Bored! It's boring.
无聊 这是很无聊
I'm bored too, I'm bored too.
我也很无聊 我也很无聊
You're bored as well? Yep.
你也很无聊吗 是的
Well, then, why don't you actually investigate a proper crime,
好吧 那你为什么不调查一桩正当的罪行
rather than just hounding me and my dad
而不是缠着我和我爸爸
for absolutely no reason, over some little hoovers?
毫无理由 为了一些小吸尘器
Kerry, I don't think you understand the severity of this crime.
Kerry 我觉得你没明白这个罪行的严重性
If convicted, you can face up to seven years in prison.
如果罪名成立 你将面临七年监禁
And as things stand,
就目前情况而言
there are 168 stolen vacuum cleaners in a lock-up
有168台偷来的吸尘器在车♥库♥里
rented out under your name.
以你的名字租的
Now, this is your final opportunity to give us your account.
现在 这是你最后的机会给我们你的叙述
Were you a year below me at school?
你在学校比我小一级吗
Yes.
是的
Used to hang out with Darren Lockhart and that?
以前常和Darren Lockhart在一起
I did, yeah.
是的
Have you heard what's happened to him now?
你有听说他现在怎样了吗
He got sacked from the nurse centre
他被护理中心开了
because he made his own periscope
因为他自♥制♥了潜望镜
and was peeping on the girls in the changing rooms.
偷♥窥♥更衣室里的女孩
I wouldn't know. Well, you should know,
我不会知道的 你应该知道
cos if you want to be investigating anything, mate,
因为如果你要是想调查点什么事情 哥们
I'd be investigating that.
是我的话就会去调查那事
Interview terminated at 13:48.
审讯中止于13点48分