英村脑残故事（2017）

If you'd like to go on through, just up and on the right, OK?
你直接往前走 上楼右转就好 好吗
Kerry, what are you doing? Checking for knives and shit.
Kerry 你在干什么 检查小刀之类的
I really don't think that's necessary.
我真的觉得没这个必要
It is, if my enemies know I'm here.
有必要 如果我的敌人知道我在这里
I was at midnight Mass one year, right,
有一年我在子夜弥撒(圣诞节礼仪)
someone got tipped off I was there,
有人听到消息说我在那儿
as I was coming out the church,
就在我走出教堂的时候
somebody tried to shoot me with a crossbow.
有人试图用十字弓射我
OK, Kerry. Right.
好的 Kerry 好吧
Sorry. Just the one ticket...? Oh, another thing.
对不起 只要一张票吗 哦 还有一件事
Just to let you know,
跟你说一声
I changed all the light bulbs in the toilet to UV,
我已经把厕所里的灯泡都换成紫外线的了
so if we get any smackheads in tonight,
如果我们今晚把瘾君子放进来的
they won't be able to see their veins when they're shooting up.
他们注射的时候会看不清他们的血管
Super. Right, um...
很棒 好了 呃
Just... Sorry about that. Just the one ticket?
不好意思 只要一张票吗
All right?
你好吗
What are you wearing? What?
你穿的是什么 什么
Why are you not dressed up?
为什么你不打扮一下
I thought you were joking. No.
我以为你在开玩笑 没有
That's the whole point of Grease cinema night
这是<油脂>影院之夜的意义所在
you dress up as, like, the people from the film.
你要打扮成电影里的人物
Well, I haven't seen the film, have I?
呃 我没看过这部电影
That's why I came here
这是我来这儿的原因
to watch the fucking film like a normal human being.
像个正常人一样看这部该死的电影
All right! Just go inside, then.
好吧 那就进去吧
Oh, my God, is that Slugs?
我的天 那是Slugs吗
What is Kayleigh wearing?!
Kayleigh穿的是什么
She looks great.
她看起来还不错
She can't walk in those shoes! Fucking 'ell.
她穿着那双鞋根本走不了路 妈呀
Bambi on ice. She looks good.
小鹿斑比走在冰面上 她看起来还不错
Hey, guys. How you doing? Doing good.
嘿 各位 你们最近怎么样 挺好的
All right, Kurtan? Yeah.
你好吗 Kurtan 嗯
Good.
那就好
All right? I'm wanna glad to see you.
你好吗 很高兴在这里见到你
Why?
为什么
This, it's shit, innit?
这个 糟糕透了 不是吗
What? This, this whole... It's embarrassing.
怎么了 这 这整个 就很尴尬
What, the party? Yeah.
什么 派对吗 是的
Don't know what party you're at, this one's bangin', mate.
不知道你说的是哪个 这个还挺嗨的 老兄
Look at everyone, look at them.
看看其他人 看看他们
You ain't dressed up. You ain't dressed up.
你没打扮 你也没打扮
Yeah, I am. I'm security.
我打扮了 我是安保
You look like Andy Fordham.
你像Andy Fordham
Who's that?
那是谁
Fat darts player, basically.
简要地说 就是一个胖胖的飞镖运动员
Well, I don't care, because I'm enjoying myself.
我不管 因为我玩得挺开心
I do miss spending time with Kurtan, actually.
我其实还挺怀念和Kurtan在一起的时光
I suppose that's a bit selfish of me, really,
我有一点自己的小私心 真的
because he's got his own life to live, but...
因为他有他自己的生活 但是
You know, it's just so good to see him so happy with Sophie.
看到他和Sophie在一起那么好 我还是很开心的
I don't even know why you getting so upset.
我不知道为什么你这么不高兴
I di...
我
I've made an effort by coming here tonight.
我付出了 今晚来了这里
I didn't want to come.
我是不想来的
Do you understand that? But I still did.
你知道吗 但我还是来了
You don't give a shit about me. Oh...
你一点都不在乎我 哦
I make such an effort, and now you don't give a shit.
我付出了这么多 但你却一点都不在乎
When I look at Slugs and Kayleigh,
我看到Slugs和Kayleigh的时候
I think that's all that I want.
我觉得那就是才是我想要的
That is insane.
简直就是神经病
It's not, he was dancing, he was making an effort.
不是的 他在跳舞 他在付出
Yeah, like a fucking boohbah. And you still haven't let me know
是啊 妈的像个泡泡宝宝(动画人物) 你现在还没告诉我
if you're coming to my parents barbecue on Sunday. Oh...
你周日来不来我爸妈家烧烤 哦
I've asked you like three times...
我已经问你三次了
Hey, hey, hey! This is Mr Belding.
嘿 嘿 嘿 我是Belding先生
What have I told you kids about loitering in the corridors?
我当初是怎么跟你们说的 别在走廊游荡
Sorry, mate, who are you?
不好意思 老兄 你是谁啊
Ian.
Ian
Ian, right,
Ian是吗
I'm just having a very serious chat with my girlfriend right here,
我正在跟我的女友进行一场严肃的对话
and what you've just done
你知道你刚才的举动
is really inappropriate, mate, all right?
是非常不合适的好吗老兄
Sorry, mate.
不好意思 兄弟
Fuck!
靠
Do you not wanna be with me?
你是不是不想跟我在一起了
Mr Belding, that...that's Saved By The Bell
Belding老师 那是<救命下课铃>里的的角色
that's not Grease.
不是<油脂>里的
He's got that totally wrong.
他完全搞错了
Sorry...
对不起
What did you say?
你说什么来着
Fucking prick.
去你♥妈♥的♥渣男
Oh, fuck.
噢 操
Mr Belding!
Belding老师
Pfft.
啐
He's... He's gonna be embarrassed about that in the morning.
等他明早意识到了够他尴尬的
Sophie dumped Kurtan last night, so he's in a bit of a state.
Sophie昨天晚上把Kurtan甩了 所以他今天有点不在状态
I had to wheel him here from his house in an Asda trolley,
我不得不用超♥市♥购物推车把他从他家推到这里
cos he was just too heartbroken to move.
因为他太伤心了以至于不能动弹
It's a shame, cos I'd just finished writing my best man speech.
这很可惜 因为我才写完我的伴郎演讲稿
But...
但是
When I first saw Sophie
当我第一次见到Sophie的时候
I thought, "Wow, Kurtan's really punching above his weight,"
我想到 "哇 Kurtan可真是牛粪遇上鲜花"
"He'll never be able to hang on to her"
"他绝对不可能跟她长久下去"
but he has, and I've never seen him happier.
但是他做到了 我从没见过他更幸福的样子
You all right?
你还好吗
Kurtan?
Kurtan
Kurtan, mate?
Kurtan 兄弟
Yeah, I just...
是的 我只是
Oh, I just need to sort my shit out.
我只是需要把我的破事解决好
Try and fix things.
尝试并且弥补一些事
Yeah, it is hard seeing Kurtan like this,
是的 看到Kurtan这样真的很不容易
but when someone's down,
但是当一个人心情低沉
there's nothing better than a little random act of kindness
没有什么比一些不经意间的善举更好的了
and I know exactly how to fix things.
而且我清楚地知道如何弥补事情
Sometimes you don't know what you got until you ain't got it any more.
有的时候你不知道你拥有什么 直到你失去了它
Hello?
哪位
Like Blockbusters.
就像百视达录像带
I just took 'em for granted - and then, one day, gone...
你就觉得它们的存在天经地义 然后某天就不见了
..And you spend ages trying to figure out what went wrong,
然后你要花很长时间去想到底是哪里出了问题
and then you realise it was your fault all along.
然后你发现一直以来都是你的错
It's all right, Kurtan.
没事的 Kurtan
Not Blockbusters, that... that was online piracy,
不是百视达的错 而是网络盗版电影的错
and lack of vision upstairs, in the boardroom.
还错在电影公♥司♥董事们的目光短浅
It's just like...
就是
..After not going to Swindon College and that,
在我不再去斯文顿大学上学之后
when I ducked out, I just thought that I'd let you down.
在我逃避的时候 我觉得我让你失望了
Of course you didn't.
你当然没有让我失望
Is...
这是
Is that why you've not been coming to see me?
这就是你为什么一直不来见我吗
Yeah. Oh, Kurtan.
是的 噢 Kurtan
Well...that, and...
还有
..The cress that we sowed together in the village hall kitchen,
我们一起在村公所厨房♥里种下的水芹
I've actually been having nightmares about it,
事实上我一直在做关于它的噩梦
because I haven't watered it in so long,
因为我好久没给它浇水了
and in my dreams, the cress is so thirsty,
在我的梦里 那个水芹因为太缺水了
it's dying like a starving dog,
它像一只饥饿的狗一步步走向死亡
and it's going, "Kurtan just left me to die."
然后它不断说 "Kurtan就放任我这样死去"
Kurtan, don't... Don't worry, it's fine.
Kurtan 别担心 没事的
I've been watering it.
我一直在给它浇水