外星人（2016）

我们都知道 近四十年外星人迫降在这里
So we all know Aliens crash landed here nearly 40 years ago.
那是很久很久以前了
Which is a long, long time.
好 接下来为我们介绍
OK. So here to tell us all about
边境管制重要工作的是Lewis
the important work of Border Control is Lewis,
他是在这里工作的边境警卫
who works here as a border guard.
是吧 Lewis
Don't you, Lewis?
没错 大家好
Certainly do. Hello, 2G.
有谁认为可以
So who here thinks it's OK
不加询问就拿走不属于自己的东西
to take things that don't belong to them without asking?
有人吗 举手 来吧
Anyone? Hands up, come on?
没有人 好极了
Nobody. Well done.
今日外星人
因为这是犯法的 是吧
Because it's breaking the law, isn't it?
但你们知道吗
Do you know what, though?
有些人会这样做
Some people do.
"人"
"People".
他们知道我们是指默克吧
They know we're talking about Morks, right?
外星人
Aliens.
好吧
Yeah...
我们去看边境 来吧
Let's go have a look at the border, come on.
所有外星人必须立刻返回特洛伊
All Aliens must return to Troy immediately...
禁止无授权外星人越过此关卡
刑罚-终身监禁
这堵墙是1990年环绕外星人区建造的
The wall was built in 1990 around the Alien zone
这里是关卡 动起来 动起来
and this is the checkpoint. Busy, busy, busy.
那里是核实他们身份的地方
That there is where we ID them,
再过去是上标签和喷喷雾的地方
and over there is where we tag and spray them.
这些外星人可能看起来和我们很像
These Aliens may look like us
但其实有一些重大区别
but there are some big differences.
问题来了
Question.
谁认为可以把你们身体的毛发割下
Who here thinks it's OK to sell the hair off your body
作为摧毁人生的毒品卖♥♥给别人吸食
for people to smoke as a life-destroying drug?
有人吗
Anybody?
没有 对吧
It's not, is it?
这就是我们对他们进行喷雾的原因
And that's why we spray them,
让他们的头发不可吸食
to make their hair unsmokeable.
你们的朋友 你们的兄弟 你们的姐妹
Your mates, your brothers your sisters
如果他们对那个上了瘾
they get hooked on that,
就可以和完整的神经功能说再见了
they can wave bye-bye to full neurological function.
五年下来 他们就得坐轮椅了
Five years down the line they're in a wheelchair,
连你是谁都不知道了 完全不知道
not a clue who you are. Not a clue!
好了 我看到有的人开始不安了
All right, I can see some of them are getting a bit upset.
他们一部分人是好的
Some of them are fine.
如果他们想到这边来
If they want to come over here to this side
来工作 并且守规矩 那很好
and work and behave, great.
但我和我的同行们会确保
But me and people like me are going to make sure
他们都被打过标签喷过喷雾
they are tagged and sprayed,
八点前 他们都要回到自己该待的那一边
and by eight o'clock, every one of them is back the right side of that wall.
所以你们安心睡觉吧
So you lot sleep easy,
因为我不会让任何坏事发生的
cos I'm not going to let anything bad happen.
说话算数
That's a promise.
拒绝毛发
No to fur.
开心点 小家伙 你在好人这边 这儿没问题
Cheer up, little one, you're on the good side. It's good here.
我会保护你们所有人
I'm here to protect you all.
禁止无授权外星人越过此关卡
外星人指定区域

太短了 等你有东西可卖♥♥了再过来
Too short. Come back when you've got something to sell.
是全身的 我们两个
It's full body. Both of us.
看 看这个 上等货
Look, look at it, it's premium.
没被喷洒过
It ain't been sprayed.
把衣服脱了
Take 'em off then.
剩下的也脱了
And the rest.
别动 太迟了
Don't. Too slow!
被我耍了吧
Fell for my trick, didn't you?
跟我比你就是个门外汉
I made you look amateur besides me.
对 我就是这么机智
Yeah, I am so slick.
没人比得上我的机智
No-one can compete with my slickness.
你知道这是Fabian的毛发处理点吗
You know this is Fabian's fur house?
- 你正在犯一个巨大的错误 - 错
- You're making a giant-sized mistake here. - Wrong!
我不会犯错 都是有意为之 走吧
I don't make mistakes. I make on-purposes. Now, come on.
你知道你一旦走出那扇门
You know once you go through that door,
你就只有15分钟可活了
you've got a life expectancy of about 15 minutes?
信不信把门捅你屁♥股♥里 过来
Stick your door up your arse, yeah? Come here.
你告诉Fabian寂静帮来拜访你们了
You tell Fabian that you got a visit from The Silence Crew.
谁
Who?
寂静帮
The Silence Crew.
因为我们是个帮派 如果你跟我们对着干
Because we're a crew. If you go against us,
你们就会永远寂静 明白吗
then you get silenced, yeah?
听起来像"鸡茎帮"
Sounds like silent screw.
- 没错 - 你闭嘴 我说了我们不改名
- Yep. - You shut up. I told you, we're not doing a name change.
- 好了吗 - 好了
- Ready? - Yeah.
咋地 咋地
What? What?
傻♥逼♥
Stupid bastard.
- 咋地 - 啊
- What's that? - Eh?
过来 把手放那儿
Come here, put your hand on there.
- 滚蛋 凭什么 - 一会儿你就知道了 哥们
- Piss off. Why? - You'll find out when I show you, mate.
啊
Argh!
寂静
Silence!
- 快点 - 咋地 咋地
- Hurry up! - What, what?
寂静帮
Silence Crew!
快点 走 走 走 走
Come on, go, go, go, go!
外有外星人
边境管制
此处房♥屋
二十四小时监控
警 告
警 告
此处房♥屋
二十四小时监控
未授权外星人请勿越过此限
违者面临终身监禁
他 们 来 了
宇宙飞船迫降于英国海岸
他 们 来 了
宇宙飞船迫降于英国海岸
他 们 来 了
宇宙飞船迫降于英国海岸
他 们 来 了
宇宙飞船迫降于英国海岸
外 星 人
第一季 第一集
爸 意大利面呢
Dad, where's the pasta?
记得我说过买♥♥点意大利面吗
Remember I said get pasta?
- 我们需要吗 - 做意大利肉酱面吗
- Do we need it? - For spag bol?
当然 否则就只有意大利肉酱了 是吧
Yeah, otherwise it's just bol, isn't it?
你好吗 Hol
All right, Hol?
- 还好吗 Ivan - 挺好
- All right, Ivan? - All right.
Ivan又在玩假装下楼了
Ivan's doing the stair thing, yeah...
我们能把Ely留在这里一小会儿吗
All right if we leave Ely here for a bit?
当然可以
'Course it is.
有商业会议要去参加
Got some business meetings to attend to.
他不会惹麻烦的 他有自己的事做
He'll be no trouble, though. He's had his tea.
不 他没有
No, he hasn't.
什么 没有吗
What, has he not?
那就给他找点事做
Well, give him his tea then.
这是什么
What's this?
- 打扰一下 嘿 - 恶
- Excuse me, hello? - Urgh.
怎么了
What?
哦 没关系 他以为这是电子烟
Oh, he's all right. He thinks they're e-cigarettes.
给你 抽两口 放松一下
Here you are, have some of this, loosen up.
不用了 谢谢 它对我没作用 你知道的
No, thank you. It does nothing to me. You know that.
你要去哪儿 我接下来还有安排
Where are you going anyway? I've got things to do.
什么安排 燃情约会
Like what, hot date?
你肯定没约会
No, I didn't think so.
我们11点前回来 到时候见
We'll be back before 11, see you then.
小心点
Well, just be careful.
我一直很小心 待会儿见
Yeah, I always am. See you later.
回见
See ya.

你好 Lilyhot
Hello, Lilyhot.
蒙彼利埃那边怎么样
How're things in Montpellier?
一切都很好 今天天气不错
Things are very good. Very sunny today.