灵异女仆（2019）

已经三个月了
It's been three months.
（前情提要）
如果其他人会来找你 他们不应该早就来了吗
If the rest were going to come for you, wouldn't they have done so already?
嘿 小姑娘
Hey there, little lady.
他们可以在不知不觉中潜入你的生活
They can slip into your life without you even noticing.
莉安
Leanne.
我不知道这是哪来的 快拿杀虫剂
I don't know where they're coming from! Get the spray!
打电♥话♥给除害虫公♥司♥
Call a fucking exterminator!
我的手伸进去了 我离得最近 但我完全没被蛰到
My hand was right there. I was by far the closest one. I didn't get stung once.
那姑娘带着一个孩子来这个家 很可能是她自己的孩子
That girl came into this house with a child that was probably hers.
-她的 -如果我猜对了
- Hers? - If I'm right,
任何事都有代价
there's a price to pay.
-代价 比如呢 -比如我们的忠诚
- A price? Like what? - Our loyalty.
宝贝…我觉得 我们应该向前了…那是什么
Babe. Babe? I think we're going. We're going. What is that?
总之 我的意思是 对 那是一个痛苦的经历 我当时那么小
Anyway, I mean, yeah, it was really painful. And I was so young.
你明白我的意思吗
You know what I mean?
但是要说我母亲做对了哪件事
But the one thing that my mother did right
那就是没有让我在医院时抱宝宝
was not let me hold my baby in the hospital.
这样我不会对她产生不健康的依恋
That way I didn't have any unhealthy attachments to her.
可是莉安就在这里
But Leanne, she's right here.
看着另一个女人养育她的宝宝
And watching another woman raise her baby.
我…这太难以置信了
I-- Blows my mind.
我知道 但就算真是她的…
I know. But even if it is hers…
她似乎很愿意让多萝西和肖恩 和他玩过家家
…she seems happy enough to let Dorothy and Sean play house with him.
宝贝 她可不是什么情绪稳定的人
She's not the most stable ship in the sea, babe.
已经有一些崩溃的迹象了
You can see the leaks springing.
要是莉安有一天突然决定 带着她的孩子离开怎么办
Well, what happens if Leanne just decides to leave one day and takes her kid?
然后呢
Then what?
多萝西要一辈子寻找自己的儿子
Dorothy is going to look for her son forever?
这个人生前景听起来很糟糕啊
Seems like a shitty life.
你说得有道理
Mmm. Mmm, you have a point.
必须在法律上站得住脚
Gotta have a legal leg to stand on.
除非我们证明孩子是莉安的
Unless we proved it was Leanne's.
这把年纪去跳脱衣舞有点老吧 老姐
Little old for the pole, sis.
别烦我
Leave me alone.
我有个玛丽莲梦露模仿大赛的报道任务
I have been tasked with covering a Marilyn Monroe look-alike contest.
而且我告诉你 跳脱衣舞我也完全能胜任
And I'll have you know I'm definitely not too old to strip.
你能确保莉安今天 不让杰里科睡得太久吗
Oh, would you make sure Leanne doesn't let Jericho nap too long today?
昨晚他一直在闹
He wouldn't settle last night.
我筋疲力尽了 而且我很确定
I'm exhausted, and I'm fairly certain
玛丽莲的曼妙身材不包括眼袋
Marilyn's curves didn't include heavy bags under her eyes.
好
Okay.
告诉肖恩一声 这两天会有位妈妈过来
Oh, tell Sean one of the mothers is coming by today or tomorrow sometime
取她落在这里的尿布包
to pick up the diaper bag she left behind.
我应该会忘记
I'll be sure not to.
如果加五分之一瓶伏特加 一定会大大改善这口感
This would be infinitely improved with a fifth of vodka.
也会改善你的性格
So would you.
阿门
Amen.
你要带宝宝去阿鲁巴
You taking the kid to Aruba?
不 我要带莉安去公园
No, I'm taking Leanne to the park.
一起吗 天气这么好
You want to come? It's a gorgeous fucking day.
不 我甚至无法说服她走完这个街区
No. I couldn't even get her down the block.
你觉得她会愿意去公园
You think she's gonna stroll in the park?
我觉得她准备好了 我们都取得了进步
I think she's ready. We're all making progress.
很快我们会成为一个正常家庭
Pretty soon we'll be a normal fucking family.
是
Yeah.
说到这个
About that…
我在想我们应该测一测 莉安和杰里科的DNA
I was thinking we should test Leanne and Jericho's DNA.
那是为了什么
Why the hell would we do that?
为了确定
To know for sure.
也许能走领养程序
And maybe initiate some adoption proceedings.
让这一整个闹剧变得合法
Make this whole debacle legal.
朱利安 现在情况很好 别破坏它
Julian, things are good. Try not to fuck with it.
-你把注意力放在自己身上 自己的家 -我只是想保护…
-You concentrate on you. At your place. -I'm just trying to protect this--
保护什么
Protect what?
保护肖恩 别让他害了自己 他说要做甜菜拿铁
Sean from himself. He was talking about a beet latte.
我不能任他这样胡闹
I won't be party to that kind of horror.
我找不到他的帽子 我去去就来
I can't find his hat. I'll be right back.
朱利安 你能先抱一下他吗 我穿件外套
Julian, could you take him for a second while I do this?
我浑身都是甘蓝 也许他会过敏
Oh, I'm covered in kale. He might be allergic.
走吧
Ready?
我找到他的太阳眼镜了
I found his sunglasses.
瞧 迷你版的
Look how tiny they are.
我们不用走太远的
We don't have to go far.
花儿 瞧
Oh, the flowers. Look.
看 花草树木
Look, flowers. Trees.
你知道这是能吃的吗
Did you know you could eat those?
-花可以吃 -有些可以
- You can eat flowers? - Well, some.
这些是蒲公英 所有部位都能食用
These are dandelions. The whole thing's edible.
那是芥菜花 那是马齿苋
That's mustard flower. There's a purslane.
用来做阿根廷青酱最棒了
These make a great chimichurri.
富含维生素和欧米伽-3脂肪酸
Full of vitamins and omega-3s.
可以放在汤里 作为装饰或炖煮
You can put it in a soup or a garnish or stew.
真好
It's nice.
-给点零钱吧 -好 让我找找
- Spare change? - Sure, let me see what I got.
有
Oh, yeah.
我想回家
I want to go home.
小心 很烫
Careful. It's hot.
管好你的舌头 肖恩
Ugh, put your tongue back in your mouth, Sean.
我没心情
Not in the mood.
我刚得知在我扮已故美女的时候
I just found out that while I'm playing dead diva,
伊莎贝尔在报道卡普洛维兹案件
Isabelle is covering the Kaplowitz case.
我觉得你的报道更有趣 多萝西
I think yours sounds more fun, Dorothy.
莉安 你这么说很贴心
That's very sweet of you, Leanne.
但是相信我 没什么比得上谋杀审判
But trust me, there's nothing like a good murder trial.
而且知道为什么我沦落到报道玛丽莲吗
And do you know why I got stuck with Marilyn?
他们说我的身材更丰满 你能相信吗
They said I was curvier. Can you believe that?
你穿这条裙子确实凹凸有致 多萝西
You do fill out that dress, Dorothy.
嘿 别闹 你要让莉安不好意思了
Hey! Stop. You're going to embarrass Leanne.
这碗汤的味道就像春天
This tastes like spring.
又是汤啊 肖恩
Soup again, Sean?
今天散步给我带来了灵感
I was inspired by our walk.
这是蒲公英汤 很不错
It's dandelion soup. It's good.
我不太饿
I'm actually not very hungry.
我觉得这条裙子已把我的内脏挤得移位了
I think this dress has rearranged my organs.
我得剪开它才能脱掉了
I'm going to go cut myself out of it.
我给他洗澡吧
I'll take him for his bath.
不 我能看出他需要妈咪
No. I can tell he needs his mommy.
你是怎么回事
What's up with you?
反正不正常 我睡不好觉
Things just aren't right. I'm not sleeping well.
我和妻子总在为蠢事吵架
My wife and I keep getting in stupid-ass fights.
你只是刚从邪教的狂热中走出来
You're just coming off your weird cult high.
你会调整过来的 相信我 找到你的新热忱就好
You'll ride it out. Trust me, you just find your new high.
你没见过那些邪教疯子吧
You haven't seen any of those cult freaks, have you?
他们没找你麻烦吧
They're not messing with you?
没有
No.
我们到底为什么来这里
Why are we out here anyway?
如果你姐姐或肖恩看见我 他们不会高兴的
If your sister or Sean see me, they aren't going to like it.
首先 我们往常去的健身房♥ 闻起来像是老人
Well, first, our usual gym smells like an old man
感染了治不好的葡萄球菌
with a incurable staph infection.
该死
Fuck.
该死
Oh, fuck.
该死
Shit.
该死
Oh, fuck.
第二 我需要你帮我 取得杰里科和莉安的DNA
And second, I need you to help me get Jericho and Leanne's DNA.
再简单不过 我已经准备好 你需要的一切工具
Couldn't be simpler. I already have all the equipment you'll need.
对 把这个插♥进♥宝宝的鼻子
Yeah. You just shove this up the baby's nose.
不行 去找一个那种测试盒就好
No way. Just-- Just get one of those kits.
那需要注册 使用信♥用♥卡♥
Ah, you have to register, use a credit card.
需要好几周时间 我要现在就有结果 不会亏待你的
It takes weeks. I need this now. You'll be compensated more than fairly.
朱利安 我已经不再假扮侦探了