疯城记（2009）

I was played by Sir Richard Attenborough
我的传记电影可是由理查德·阿滕伯勒
in a film of my life.
饰演我的
Who did he get? Martin Clunes.
他由谁演呢 马丁·克鲁尼斯而已
He was rather good actually. Didn't overdo the comedy.
其实马丁演的很不错 没夸大喜剧效果
Yeah, they should have got one of the Chuckle Brothers.
他们应该找"搞笑兄弟"其中一人来演
Gas and acid, that's for faggots.
气体和硫酸是给笨蛋用的
Real men use their hands.
真汉子都是徒手的
Don't listen to him, he has six different personalities.
别听他的 他有6重人格呢
Shut up! No, you shut up!
闭嘴 不 你闭嘴
Oh, you've confused me now, I don't know what to do!
你们都把我搞糊涂了 我该怎么做
Then why not ask the man who was never caught.
那就问问那个逍遥法外的人吧
**It can be such a bore*
*面对妓♥女♥又一个
**when faced with yet another whore*
*别出心裁将她割
**to think of a new method to dispatch her*
*千篇一律惹人恶
**So when I'm feeling grand I change my modus operandi*
*何不趁着心情好 作案手法改一套
**and in that way no-one will ever catch ya!*
*法网恢恢亦可逃
**When you've covered all the angles*
*所有手段全想遍
**from poisoning to strangles*
*下毒扼颈逐个拣
**and you haven't yet been dragged into the dock*
*主意依旧未浮现
**It's always much more thrilling*
*独辟蹊径索人命
**to be inventive with your killing*
*势必动魄又心惊
**But if they catch you you could get a nasty shock!*
*倘若他朝落法网 受刑通电必身亡
**Instead of trying to restrict him*
*与其拼命将其钳
**take a trophy from your victim*
*不如把他阴毛剪
**A clipping of their pubic hairs is good*
*当做纪念留身边
**And if you want to cause a ripple*
*若想恶名速传开
**make a belt from ladies nipples*
*就用乳♥头♥做腰带
**and wear it as you dance round in the woods!*
*缠腰林间把舞载
**And while your heart is tripping*
*想到开膛再上演
**at the thought of yet more ripping*
*心潮澎湃醉心田
**and your hands they might be slipping*
*双手握颈后渐松
**from the neck they are gripping*
*虽若游丝命未终
**and the acid it is dripping*
*手持硫酸浇其身
**from the body you are dipping*
*滴答滑落声如钟
**and your trusty spade is flipping*
*挥舞手中生锈铲
**all the bodies you are tipping*
*霍霍生风把尸赶
**And while you amass your clippings*
*偶像尽收剪贴本
**of DeSalvo, Haigh and Crippen...*
*德萨黑格克里彭
Christie! Sorry!
是克里斯蒂 抱歉
**Take some advice from one killer to another*
*且听前辈来忠告
**There's always someone worse than you*
*总会有人比你糟
**In your case it's your mother!*
*你娘不及你分毫
David! Have you done it yet?
戴维 你下手了吗
I'm sick of looking at all those royals.
我看够那些皇室成员的蜡像了
The Queen Mum looks more like John McEnroe.
皇太后弄得跟约翰·麦肯罗似的
So what did you do then?
那你刚才是怎么杀他的
Um...strangle.
用勒的
Strangle? What a waste,
用勒的 多浪费呀
I thought you'd have had more fun with it
我还以为这里所有工具触手可及
with all this at your fingertips.
你会杀得过瘾点呢
Mind you, we've still got one more to do, haven't we?
提醒你 我们还得再杀一个呢 记得吧
Never mind, come on.
算了 走吧
I've got it all worked out, David.
我都想好了 戴维
We have the reception down here,
我们可以把接待处摆在这
and then one by one all the waxworks come alive!
然后让蜡像一个个活过来
It's been done.
已经活了
So when one of you's having sex,
那当你们其中一个在做♥爱♥时
what do you do with the other one?
另一个怎么办呢
Do you just chuck a duvet over it?
就躲在被窝里避开吗
No,
不
we come apart with Velcro.
撕开我们俩间的魔术贴就是了
Oh, that's handy.
那还真方便呀
Well? Nothing.
怎么样了 没用
He wouldn't speak to me. Oh, this is ridiculous.
他不理我 这太荒谬了
Why don't I just go up there and smack it out of him?
不如让我上去狠揍他一顿好了
Bob!
鲍伯
Either of you two got a cigarette?
你们俩谁有烟呢
They're in the van. Can I get one, please?
在车里 能给我拿一根吗
We're just settled here.
我们才刚坐下
Come on, Kelly-Su. Be good to, er...stretch our legs.
走吧 凯莉·苏 活动一下腿脚也好
I'll tell you something about those two bitches...
我告诉你们 那两个贱♥人♥...
Have they gone yet? No, we're still here.
她们走了吗 没 我们还在呢
Have they gone now?
现在走了吗
They're just...
她们刚...
Now they've gone.
现在走了
I'll tell you something about those two bitches.
我告诉你们 那两个小贱♥人♥
They're not to be trusted.
完全信不过的
They'll promise you one thing,
她们表面上答应了你
and then stab you in the back.
背后却捅你一刀
Isn't that right, Tealeaf? He's gone with them.
对吧 小毛贼 他跟她俩一块走了
Hey? Tealeaf, no!
什么 小毛贼 别这样
Tealeaf!
小毛贼
I thought that fall down the stairs
我还以为她滚下楼梯
would have killed her. Fat bitch.
就会摔死了呢 死肥婆
You should leave now, my darling.
你该走了 亲爱的
The less you touch, the better.
你碰的东西越少越好
What, not even you? Oh, I'm not saying that.
怎么 连你也不能碰吗 我可没这么说
Now go on, before you get me all hot and bothered.
快走吧 省得你搞得我焦虑不安
OK, I know when I'm not wanted.
好吧 我知道我碍事了
I'll, er, I'll just go and take Freddy up to bed.
我看我先抱弗雷迪上♥床♥吧
I'll bet he's tired out, aren't you, my little angel?
他肯定累坏了 对吧 我的小天使
Nicola?
妮古拉
Do you know where his clean jim-jams are, George?
你知道他干净的睡衣放在哪吗 乔治
I think he's got a little bit of nappy rash starting.
我觉得他好像起了点尿布疹
What are you doing?
你在干嘛
Well, we've got to take good care of him, George.
我们要好好照顾他 乔治
He's our little Freddy now.
他现在是咱俩的小弗雷迪了
Little Freddy Fruitcake.
小弗雷迪宝贝儿
Oh, God, no!
天啊 别这样
Nicola, please... I'm joking!
妮古拉 别这样... 我开玩笑呢
I don't know how you lived
我不明白你怎么能
with it for so long, George, I really don't.
忍♥这么久 乔治 我真不明白
Yeah, well, those days are over.
那些日子到头了
And this little bastard can go to his new home --
这个小混♥蛋♥也可以搬新家了
the wheelie bin.
去垃圾桶里待着吧
Apparently we weren't the only ones
显然我们不是唯一
that were bidding for Snappy on eBay.
在易趣上竞拍潇洒鳄鱼的人
There was another bidder, and Ian sent the toy to him.
还有一个买♥♥家 伊恩把玩具寄给他了
Well done, Tealeaf.
干得好 小毛贼
Have you got the address?
你拿到地址了吗
Better than that. I've got a number.
我要到了电♥话♥ 比地址强多了
Yes? Can I speak to the owner of Snappy the Crocodile?
喂 我想找潇洒鳄鱼的主人
Speaking.
我就是