熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S01E10

Part 1 Dec. 8, 2020, 11:16 p.m.

为什么在这个镇上的人都对他们的
Why does everyone in this cul- de- sac think it's ok
疯狗胡作非为而视而不见呢
To let their stupid dogs run loose?
外面就像加尔各答
It's like calcutta out there.
你在干嘛呢
What are you doing?
看看能不能找到些不要的东西
Trying to round up any crap I can find
把它们再转送出去就像这稀罕玩意儿
To regift this christmas, like this little gem here...
去年鲍比叔叔送我的礼物
Last year's present from Bobby's uncle.
种族歧视叔叔还是贩毒叔叔
Racist uncle or drug dealer uncle?
种族歧视叔叔
Racist uncle.
贩毒叔叔现在升级为监狱叔叔了
Drug dealer uncle is now prison uncle.
对因为他还有个侦探表亲
Oh, right, because of detective cousin.
我可真服了他的家人了
I miss Bobby's family.
早上好
Morning.
你一定在想你的小日子多舒服啊
Wow. If you're wondering, you're too comfortable.
天真热我正想往你泳池里冲呢
It's hot. I'm gonna go hop in your pool.
这真滑稽搞笑而且恶心
Hey, you know what's funny... funny- ha ha, and funny- err?
我穿着一件红体恤衫睡
I slept in a red T-shirt,
然而这里却有一点点的蓝色线头
And yet there's a little bit of blue lint in here.
你还敢闻它
Don't you dare smell that.
很好现在它掉在我的地板上了
Oh, good. now it's on my floor.
别游泳了茱尔斯要和我一起去健身
And no swimming. Jules and I are going to spin class,
你得照顾一下斯坦
And you've got to take care of Stan.
等他醒了你得给他换尿布
So when he gets up, you gotta change his diaper,
然后给他穿好衣服
And then you gotta get him dressed.
你真的觉得我还没对这些应对自如吗
You really don't think I could figure that out?
-确实如此 -好吧
- I really don't. - Fine. oh,
我喜欢这个我能穿上吗
I love this. Can I have it?
当然了就当做是你的圣诞礼物吧
Sure, but it counts as your christmas present.
一言为定我是俏夫人太平了
Deal. I am a saucy bitch. bink!
劳里正带人看♥房♥♥呢我得提醒她
Oh, Laurie's showing a house. I have to remind her
不要用"帅呆"来形容一切事物
Not to describe everything as "slammin'."
这个房♥间帅呆了
So this room is totally slammin'.
"帅呆"就是"很棒" 这是间很棒的房♥子
And by "slammin', I mean great. It's a great room.
其实用不着那些陈词滥调
I'm fine without all the blah- blah.
我已经看过这房♥子好几次了
I've already seen the house a few times.
好几次了
A few times?
我有好几只脚戒我还有好几个爸爸
I've got a few toe rings, I've got a few dads,
而且我还被牵涉进好几宗家庭纠纷中
And I've been involved in a few domestic disputes.
你已经看过这房♥子8次了
You've seen this house eight times.
这还是不完全统计呢
That's officially a buttload.
那我能做些什么来补偿吗
Uh, what can I do to fix this?
好吧那
Oh, okay. well...
不我开玩笑我不关心
No, I'm kidding. I don't care.
过来大嘴巴
Come on, blah- blah,
再带我看一下那个厨房♥吧
show me that kitchen again, huh?
快来大嘴巴快点
Come on, blah- blah! come on!
这里人可真多啊
You know, it's pretty crowded in here.
我提议我们应该坐在划船机械上
Let's just do that thing where we sit on the rowing machines
-不划船只看电视 -不行
- without rowing and watch tv. - Oh, we can't.
我已经全副武装了
I have my spinning outfit on,
-可不是装装样子的 -有什么区别
- Not my fake rowing outfit. - What's the difference?
-护腕和加厚内衣 -早上好辣妹
- Wristbands and thicker undies. - Morning, chicas.
睁大双眼好好瞧瞧
Drink in my new outfit.
芭布你看起来像是要去滑雪
Barb, you look like a bobsledder
好吧我可参加过多次滑雪比赛
Well, I have sledded down a few bobs.
嘿我看到好多新面孔哦
Hey! I see some new faces.
德韦恩是最棒的
Dwayne's the best.
他有充分激发人积极性的魔力
He's got a magical way of motivating people.
跟上节奏你们这群胖奶牛
Saddle up, you fat, lazy cows!
再接再厉卡罗尔
Try harder, Carol!
这样不错吧
Ah. isn't this great?
在游艇上喝上一杯提神的咖啡
Drinking a refreshing cup of Joe on a boat...
我们好像置身于某个奇特咖啡电视广♥告♥里
It's like we're in one of those fancy coffee commercials.
在停车场的破旧游艇咖啡广♥告♥ 够经典
The old boat- in- a- parking lot coffee commercial. classy.
现在貌似不好惹啊火♥药♥桶
Whoa, a little pricklier than usual, greystoke.
但你还是看起来不错啊帅哥
But you're still looking good... handsome.
上帝在造你的时候可不会三心二意的
God was not multitasking when he made you.
他没有在建造高山
No, he wasn't building mountains
或是在造小鸡什么的
and making chick or not.
-他很用心的 -我们怎么到这世上的
- he was focused. - how did we get here?
我不知道为什么这么低落
I don't know. why so down?
我心里有点事
I have something on my mind,
而我不想说
And I don't want to talk about it.
你知道什么也许会让你好起来点吗
You know what might make you feel better?
我一朋友突发奇想把一个链锯
My buddy feisty just put a chainsaw
放到了来♥福♥枪♥的底下就像个刺刀一样
On the end of his rifle, kind of like a bayonet.
我们过去瞅瞅怎么样
What do you say we head on down there
我们用一天时间去打猎然后把它们切成片
For a day of shooting things and slicin'em up?
我可不确定去见识某人的来♥福♥枪♥
Yeah, I'm not sure I'm up
就能打起精神来
For playing with someone's rifle- saw.
见识来♥福♥枪♥
Rifle- saw!
比起说看古老档案要好多了
That's a much better name for the saw- fle.
健身课上的那家伙可真惹火
Ohh. spin class guy was so hot.
我真想当他的单车座
I wanted to be his bike seat.
你得让开一下了
Oh. hey, you need to move,
因为这一区域要派上用场了
Because if this area is gonna work again,
我们得坐会儿
It needs to sit.
-不会吧 -不行
- Oh! that's not gonna happen. - Oh, no way.
崔维斯快扶我上楼我要洗个热水澡
Oh, Travis, take me upstairs and put me in a hot bath?
我以为你要到70岁才会需要我的搀扶呢
That's a sentence I was hoping not to hear until you were 70.
你儿子在这里你要仔细检查一下
Here's your boy. You want to check him over,
确保他完好无损吗
Make sure he's okay?
你真想让我信任你带小孩的能力吗
You really want me to trust you more with Stan?
今天你来带他怎么样什么情况都别问我
How about you take him today? No instructions,nothing.
你真的信任我
You really gonna trust me?
-当然了再见 -谢谢宝贝这对我意义重大
- I really am. Bye. - huh. Oh, thanks, hon. That means a lot.
-噢多恩爱啊 -是啊不过她并不是心甘情愿的
- Aw, that was sweet. - Yeah, she didn't mean it, though.
她想要信任我可惜她做不到
She wants to trust me. It's just not in her.
我给儿子洗澡或喂奶的方法不当或是把他
She's always gonna freak out if I bathe him wrong
像这样举过头顶她都会抓狂
Or feed him wrong or pretend he's a top hat.
你好小老板
Hello, guvnor!
杀进来了
Incoming.
忘了我的包包
Forgot my purse.
总是在找包包
Always look out for the purse.
故意把它们留下来当无间道
They leave it behind like a little spy.
他居然叫我"大嘴巴"
He called me "blah- blah."
我发誓茱尔斯我真想杀了他
I swear to god, jules, I would have killed him,
不过那样我们就卖♥♥不出去那该死的房♥子了
But then we'd never sell that stupid house,
没人会想买♥♥一座发生过谋杀案的房♥子
Because no one wants to buy a murder house
除非是我姐姐蒂娜不过她现在也后悔了
Except for my older sister Tina. She regrets it now, though,
她说她的房♥子被一个大学教授的鬼魂纠缠
Because she says her house is haunted by a college professor
把她所有的的衣服都翻转了
Who turns all her clothes inside out
还偷她的酸奶
And steals her yogurt.
有时候蒂娜喜欢撒谎但这件事上
Sometimes Tina lies for attention, but this time,
我不知道我相信她因为证据太多了
I don't know. I believe her. There is just too much proof.
我们还是回到
I'm gonna take a giant leap back
你说的第一件事上面
To the first thing that you said.
听着杰夫是很惹人讨厌
Look, Jeff is annoying,
不过我们本来就是干服务业的
But we're in the service business.
你知道吗劳里作为一个受到嘉奖的
You know, Laurie, one of the things I've learned
房♥产经纪人我所学到的东西就是
As an award-winning real estate agent...
等等你说的嘉奖是那个绿色产业证书吗
Wait, are you talking about that green business certificate
就是因为我们换了节能灯而得的那个
We got for changing all our lightbulbs?
那也是个奖嘛我想说的是
It's an award. The point is,
我们不能让客户影响我们
We don't let our clients rattle us.
杰夫总是能影响到你
Jeff always rattles you.
不那是以前后来我的心理医生
No, he used to. Then my shrink told me
让我把他想象成一个穿着小裤裤的小矮人
To think of him as a tiny little man who wears tiny little pants
手里还转动着着一根微型的小拐杖
Who sometimes twirls a tiny little cane in his tiny little hand.
你的心理医生好像很牛的样子
Your shrink sounds amazing.