付出与收获

为伟大的索丽娜·吕妮塔欢呼吧！
Make some noise for the great Sorina Luminita!
这里是迈阿密 纯金酒吧
This is Solid Gold, Miami.
嗨 这是母乳么？
Hey, is that breast milk?
- 啥？ - 这是人奶么？
- What? - Is that breast milk?
- 为啥这得是母乳？ - 因为它就是
- Why would that be breast milk? -'Cause this is.
听好 拿着这个
Listen. You take this,
加进去的话 你就能得到真正的生长激素
you put it in there and you got the real HGH.
就像一种类固醇奶昔一样！
I'm talking about a steroid shake!
我从一个孕妇那儿买♥♥的
I got this pregnant chick I buy it from.
她很干净的
She real clean, too.
- 不 - 不不不 千真万确
- No. - No, no, no, for real.
她可是有全套的检查证明
She just got her tests and everything.
真是二你有喝过孕妇的乳汁么？
Oh, my.“ You ever suck a pregnant woman tittie?
真是棒极了 你也来点吧！
Oh, my God! This is so good! Come on, try some.
哥们 会让你看起来更健壮的！
It'll make you great, man!
你知道么 虽然你肌肉已经很发达了 但你可以更发达些？
You already big, but you could be bigger, you know?
我也很发达 我都快浮肿了！
I'm big! I'ma be swolled, though.
穿过门时都得侧着走
Walk sideways through doors.
来点么？ 我们可是好兄弟
You want some? We could be tittie brothers.
耶！
Yeah!
我准备说 不
I'm going to go with "no."
- 失陪一下 - 你..
- Excuse me. - What you...
现在就留我一个在酒吧？
Now I'm the guy at the bar?
好吧 还是我自己享用这些母乳吧
Fine, keep my breast milk to myself.
酶 保罗 你觉得索丽娜怎么样？
Hey, Paul? What do you think of Sorina?
哇哦 她.. - 对 她就是个女神！
Wow, she's... Exactly. She's perfect!
我还以为我们只能在伦敦找演员的
And we thought we were gonna have to cast in London.
给我介绍下你们在拍的电影叹
Please, tell me again about this movie you're making.
宝贝 不是个电影 是个音乐片
No, it's not a movie, baby, it's a music video.
大笔预算 夕阳 豪车 埃菲尔铁塔
But big budget. Sets, cars, Eiffel Tower.
场面会很震撼的
It's going to be amazing.
保罗 给索丽娜介绍下
Tell Sorina about the song, Paul.
她很激动的
She's very excited.
恩里克是..是我们的主唱
Enrique is our... ls our lead singer.
他和一个美女相爱了
And he falls in love with a beautiful woman.
- 我么？ - 你就是女主演！
- Me? - You're the leading lady!
当然啦！
Yes, of course!
他一路追寻着那个美女 也就是
And he follows this beautiful woman, you,
直至伦敦
all the way to London.
所有一切都是从特兰西瓦尼亚（罗马尼亚一座城市）开始的
It all started in Transylvania.
我曾当选罗马尼亚小姐
I was Miss Bucharest.
吕妮塔·德勒格内什蒂就是个娼妓！
Ludimila Draganesti is a whore!
她性贿赂那帮愚蠢的评委
She show her vageena to the stupid judge.
我知道像我这样的女性
I knew the only place a woman like me could be appreciated
只有在美国才能得到赏识
was in United States.
毕竟 那是个机会之地
After all, it was the land of opportunity.
美国
USA.
- 再见！ - 我看过＜风月俏佳人＞
- Good bye! - I saw Pretty Woman.
朱莉亚·罗伯茨所做的
All Julia Roberts had to do
就是给李察·基尔展现了她的阴♥道♥
was show Richard Gere her pvsda
然后她就可以贝弗利山那儿购物了（意思指出名了）
and she got a shopping trip to Beverly Hills.
我的阴♥道♥可比她的漂亮多了
My msda was so much nicer than hers.
我现在遇到了丹尼尔
Then I met Daniel.
他有种乐观进取的精神
He had that can-do spirit.
哦 再用力点！
Yes! Bang me harder!
车子..
The car...
我的美国梦终于可以实现了
My American dream was finally coming true.
真爽！
That was great!
你不能把别人绑♥架♥了来夺取他的财产！
You can't just kidnap a guy and take his things!
你不能这样 这是违法的
You can't do that. That's so illegal.
我们可以 我们可是实干家
Yes, we can. We're do-ers. Do-ers do.
我才不做 我刚出狱
I can't do right now. I just got out of prison.
保罗 你畏惧了
That's fear, Paul.
- 好吧 宝贝 晚安了！ - 再见
- All right. Good night, babe! - Bye.
你知道什么是畏惧么？
Do you know what fear is?
似乎为真的假证据？
False Evidence Appearing Real?
那是乔尼吴说的教义！
That's a Jonny Wu line!
似乎为真的假证据
False Evidence Appearing Real.
你也知道乔尼吴？
You know Jonny Wu, too?
我压根不认识那个亚洲小子
I don't know anything about an Asian guy.
那是AA协会的教义
That's an AA line.
AA是1935年起源于俄亥俄州阿克伦市
AA started in 1935, Akron, Ohio.
我不想参与进来 你们自己干吧
And I want no part of this. You're on your own.
- 我们一起干 耶 - 才不一起..
- We're gonna do this. Yeah. - We're not gonna...
- 你会和我们一起干的 - 我才不
- You're gonna do this with us. - I'm not.
会很有趣的
It's gonna be fun.
DL 你肯定知道怎么办吧
You sure know how to pick 'em, DL.
这哥们真TM是个怪胎
Dude's a freak of fucking nature.
应该永远把他关起来
Ought to put a fence around him.
我会为丹尼 卢戈做任何事的
I'd do anything for Danny Lugo.
他是我的伙伴
He was my boy.
最亲密的伙伴
As good to me as anyone ever was.
他就是个慷慨的混♥蛋♥
He was a big-hearted motherfucker
我知道他一直为我考虑
who I knew only had my best in mind.
但是这个混♥蛋♥
But the shit he was poppin'?
在逐渐影响我的想法
This daffy plot he had percolating?
我从没犯过罪
I'd never been a crimer.
也没有理由去犯罪
Ain't never had a reason to be.
快！
Come on!
该死的 我老二不行了
Goddamn! My shit stopped working.
突然间 我有了犯罪的理由
Then all of a sudden, I had a reason.
道波先生 你还在服用类固醇么？
Mr. Doorbal, are you currently using steroids?
没有 女士
No, ma'am.
是么 你上次注射是什么时候？
Really? When's the last time you injected?
额，周一？
Uh, Monday?
昨天嘛 好的
Yesterday. Okay. Um...
我得记录下 “使用中…”
I'm just going to put down "using."
我会把他们全扔出去了
I threw them all out.
我觉得他们把我搞垮了
I think they messed me up.
没事的
Hmm. It's okay.
你可能只能患上了勃起障碍综合症
You probably just have Defeated Phallus Syndrome.
我们一直收治这样的病例
We, like, treat it here all the time.
但是别担心 我们会治好的
But don't worry, we can change all that.
我们这儿专门研究这个
It's what we specialize in here.
阳♥具♥魔法
Penis magic.
奥
Aw.
每天都有很多蛋蛋来这儿的
It took a lot of balls to come in here.
或者葡萄干这个比喻更恰当吧
More like Raisinets.
至少你的也是裹着巧克力的葡萄干
At least yours are chocolate-covered Raisinets.
额..哦
Eh? Uh... Oh.
对不起 我只是觉得
Sorry. It's just I find nothing sexier
没什么比带泪的强壮黑人更性感的了
than a big black man in tears.
我喜欢享受非洲大♥陆♥上的雨（意思享受与黑人做♥爱♥）
I love me some rain on the African plain.
我希望你女朋友知道他有多幸运
I hope your girlfriend knows just how lucky she is.
如果有个女朋友的话 她会知道的
She would know if she existed,
可是我并没有女朋友
but she doesn't exist, so...
我猜她并不知道
I guess she don't know.
哎
Whoa.
我刚突然想象到了我们在滑水道里玩的场景
I just got a flash of us together on a water slide.
这是类固醇引发的阳痪
It's a steroid-induced impotence.
但只要给你的老二
But with a shot of an engorgital
打上一针
right into your penis,
你就会和你高中时期一样
you will return to those
生龙活虎 金枪不倒
beautiful, robust erections of your high school days.
你还记得你的高中时期吧？
You do remember your high school days, don't you?
太放纵了！
Hell, yeah!
我曾给我老二起了绰号♥
I used to have a nickname for my di... I mean, penis.
叫他 欧内斯托
I used to call him Ernesto.
我曾叫我私处 米歇尔 之类的
I used to call my vag Michelle. What?
就交给我吧
Just leave it up to me and