圣诞快乐，泰德·库珀（2025）

能先去我的车那边吗 我把这些东西放下
Can we pop by my car
so I can drop all this off?
好啊 这些东西你可能还用得着
Yeah, you might need that.
东西都拿齐了吗
Got all your stuff?
哇 审判官麦审判森
Wow. Judgey McJudgerson.
没有审判 真的没有
No judgment, no.
但我很好奇 你的粉丝俱乐部
But I was wondering if
your fan club always
都穿得像退休的霹雳舞演员吗
dressed like
retired breakdancers.
真有意思 我得发短♥信♥告诉她们
That's great.
I gotta text them that.
哦 你有她们的电♥话♥号♥码
Oh, you have their numbers.
她们把我加进群聊了
They added me to the group chat.
你先请 - 谢谢
After you.
Thank you.
嘿 泰德・库珀
Hey, Ted Cooper!
大家好啊
What's up everybody?
你能 呃 先找个桌子吗
Do you want to, um,
grab us a table
我去点汉堡
and I'll get us some burgers?
可以 没问题
I can do that. Yeah.
好极了 你想喝点什么
Okay, great.
What would you like to drink?
呃
Um...
圣诞麦芽酒
Christmas ale?
圣诞麦芽酒
Christmas ale.
我喜欢
I like it.
嘿 麻烦来两杯圣诞麦芽酒
Hey, can I get two
Christmas ales, please?
♪ 玩游戏 唱圣诞歌♥ ♪
♪ ...playing games and
singing Christmas songs ♪
♪ 我一直 ♪
♪ And I've been
♪ 一整年都在耐心等待 ♪
♪ Waiting patiently all year
♪ 现在它终于来了 ♪
♪ and now that it's here
我真不敢相信 这里的每个人
What I can't believe is
that every single person here...
都认识你
knew your name.
你就像 你就像那个
You're like...
You're, like, that guy.
《欢乐酒吧》里的诺姆 这就是你
The... the Norm from Cheers.
That's who you are.
诺姆 哦 我的天 哇
The Norm? Oh, my gosh. Wow.
我在这里长大的
Well, I grew up here.
我也是啊
Well, so did I.
是啊 但你搬走了
Yeah, but you moved away.
你也搬走了 而且
So did you, and...
我现在住在这里
I live here now.
你说得对
You're right.
听起来是你的问题
Kinda sounds like a you issue.
是吗
Does it?
不 我开玩笑的
No, I'm kidding.
我每次回镇上都会来这儿 所以
I come here all the time
whenever I'm back in town, so...
你有没有想过搬回来
Have you ever thought
about moving back?
说来也巧 我刚收到布法罗的工作邀约
Funnily enough, I just got
a job offer in Buffalo.
嗯 做气象相关的吗
Hmm. Doing the weather?
嗯嗯
Mm-hmm.
听起来像是 上天在为你铺路
Well, that sounds like the...
universe aligning for you.
是啊 我不知道
Yeah. I don't know.
为什么 怎么了 为什么不呢
Why? What? Why not?
我在康宁的制片人 杰瑞
My producer in Corning,
this guy Jerry,
我刚研究生毕业他就给了我机会
he gave me an opportunity
right out of grad school
当时根本没人愿意给我机会
when literally
no one else would.
所以 我觉得我的职业生涯多亏了他
So, I kinda feel like
I owe my career to him.
而且康宁对我也很好 所以
And Corning itself
has been great to me, so...
但康宁是家吗
But is Corning home?
不 不是
No, it is not.
我打赌 你要是问这家酒吧里的每个人
I bet you if you asked every
single person in this bar,
他们都会让你接受布法罗的工作
they'd tell you to take
the job in Buffalo.
我也这么认为
As would I.
你也这么想 - 是啊
You would?
Yeah.
你可能很难理解 毕竟你
You might find this hard
to understand, given you know
五英里范围内的每个人都能叫出名字
every single person
on a first-name basis
范围
within a five-mile radius.
哦 非常感谢
Oh, thank you very much.
但我没太多时间去
But I haven't had
a lot of time to--
谢谢
Thank you.
... 参加社交活动 所以
...do much socializing, so...
能看到熟悉的面孔会很开心
it'd be nice to see
a friendly face.
哇 露丝说得对
Wow. Ruth was right.
这些汉堡看起来真的很棒
These burgers do look amazing.
哦
Ooh...
怎么了 出什么事了
What? What's wrong?
没什么 不算大事
No, nothing.
It's not a big deal.
我只是要求不要蛋黄酱 但里面有
I just asked for no mayo
and there's mayo.
嗯 我相信他们能帮你换一份
Mmm, well, I'm sure they
can fix it for you.
哦 不用 不用 没事的
Oh, no, no. It's... it's fine.
那个 服务员是老板的孩子
The, um... the server
is the owner's kid
我不想让她惹麻烦
and I don't wanna
get her in trouble.
没关系的
It's all good.
库普 你之前一直夸这些汉堡
Coop, you've been raving
about these burgers.
这里每个人都喜欢你
Everybody here loves you.
我相信他们很乐意为你换一份
I'm sure they'd love
to fix it for you.
不会有问题的
It'd be no problem.
霍普 真的没事
Hope it's fine. Really.
我现在玩得太开心了 不会因为一点蛋黄酱
I am having far too good
a time to let a little mayo
影响心情
bring me down.
好吧 让我看看
Well, let's see it.
蛋黄酱确实很多
Very mayo forward.
呃 嘿 马特・克罗纳怎么样了
Uh, hey, whatever happened
to Matt Kroner?
哦
Oh...
我们要聊高中的前男友吗
we're gonna bring up old
high school exes, are we?
打乱你的节奏 是我唯一的机会
Throwing you off your game
is about the only chance I have.
我觉得你做不到
I don't think you can do that.
呃 我们大学分手了
Uh... we broke up in college.
哦 不 我当时还很看好你们呢
Oh, no, I was
really rooting for you guys.
为什么分手了
Why'd you break up?
哦
Oh...
我不知道 他 从不敞开心扉
I don't know.
He... would never open up.
我不知道 我总是陷入这样的感情
I don't know, I keep ending up
in these relationships
和那些 男人
with guys that...
你知道的
you know...
不会为之努力的人
don't fight for it.
我是说 我明白 我工作时间很长
I mean, I get it.
I work long hours,
这很难 但我
and that's hard, but I...
不过 我
still, I...
你不用说了 这也是我单身的原因
You don't have to tell me.
It's the reason I'm single, too.
女人无法承受和气象学家约会的忙碌
Women cannot handle
the hustle and grind
和压力
of dating a meteorologist.
嗯嗯