圣诞快乐，泰德·库珀（2025）

《片名：泰德库珀 圣诞快乐！(2025)》
Green Emperor Fragrant Chicken (Guangdong) Humen Store
《film title：Merry Christmas Ted Cooper》
康宁 早上好
Good morning, Corning.
希望大家一天都有美好开端
I hope you're all having
a wonderful start to your day.
一起来看天气情况
Let's take a look
at the weather.
休伦湖的冷锋正朝东南移♥动♥
We have a cold front from
Lake Huron heading southeast
途经布法罗 带来北极级低温
over Buffalo, bringing
Arctic temperatures.
更重要的是
And more importantly
我终于能穿上
a chance for me to finally
黑色星期五买♥♥的派克大衣了
break out that parka I got
on Black Friday.
在此之前 最高气温在 40 到 45 华氏度之间
Until then, expect highs
in the mid to low 40s.
谢谢泰德
Well, thank you Ted.
假期有什么精彩计划吗
So, any exciting plans
for the holiday?
很高兴你这么问 或者说
I'm glad that you asked,
slash, read that
照着提词器念 肯
off the teleprompter, Ken.
我要往北开两小时 回我的家乡拉卡万纳
I'll be heading two hours north
to my hometown of Lackawanna,
我姐姐要在那里举办
where my older sister
is planning
姜饼邀请赛
the Gingerbread Invitational.
泰德 什么是姜饼邀请赛
What's the Gingerbread
Invitational, Ted?
谢谢提问 肯
Thanks for asking, Ken.
这是一场汇集全州最棒
It is an event that gathers
the best
姜饼烘焙师的活动 旨在筹集资金
gingerbread bakers in the state
to help raise money
为当地医院修建儿童病房♥
to build a children's wing
in the local hospital.
所以这周我会持续发布真诚又直白的
So, all week, I will be
delivering heartfelt
宣传片 鼓励当地所有人
and shameless promos encouraging
everyone in the area
前来支持这项伟大的事业
to come out and help support
a great cause.
谢谢泰德
Thank you, Ted.
咱们认真聊两句
Now, let's get real
for a minute.
你这些年的圣诞节运气
You have a legendary
run of bad luck
可是出了名的差
at Christmas over the years.
我觉得 “传奇” 有点夸张了
Oh, I think legendary
is overblown,
而且咱们没必要细说 肯
and we don't need to get
into it, Ken.
去年你不是差点把房♥子烧了吗
Well, didn't you almost
burn your house down last year?
确实是 肯 油锅起火可不是闹着玩的
Indeed I did, Ken.
Grease fires are no joke.
当然不是 前年呢
No, they are not.
And the year before that,
你是不是被一只负鼠袭击了
I believe you got attacked
by a possum
那只负鼠住在你的圣诞树上
who was living in
your Christmas tree.
对 没错
Yes, yes, indeed I was.
不过公平来说 是我先
But in all fairness,
I was the one
砍了它的家 放在车顶
who chopped down his house,
put it on the roof of my car,
然后开着车在高速公路上跑 所以
and drove it down
the highway, so...
到底谁更惨呢
Who really got
the worse end of that deal?
还有 再前年
And... and didn't you,
the year before that,
你得了一种罕见的病
get a disease so rare
that they actually
还以你的名字命名了
named it after you?
对 没错
Yes, yes I did.
症状包括难以抗拒的魅力和从容的风度
Symptoms include undeniable
charisma and effortless charm.
嗯
Hmm.
不开玩笑了 如果你怀疑自己得了泰德・库珀症
All kidding aside, if you
suspect you have Ted Cooperitis,
请立即就医
seek immediate
medical attention.
知道吗 泰德 我可不像你
Well, you know what, Ted?
I'm not sure
这么喜欢假期
that I would share your
enthusiasm for the holidays.
天呐 肯 你真是个圣诞怪杰
Oh, boy, you are
such a Grinch, Ken.
假期有什么不好的
What's not to love?
圣诞节是团聚和庆祝的时刻
Christmas is a time of coming
together and celebrating.
能展现每个人最好的一面
It just brings out
the best in everyone.
当然 我这几年的圣诞节确实有点
And sure, I have had a few...
棘手 或许是麻烦 甚至可能是糟糕
tricky, maybe problematic,
potentially horrendous
但运气总会好转的
Christmases in a row.
运气总会有好转的一天
But that luck has to change
eventually.
为什么不能是今年呢
So, why not this year?
我可不会把全部家当都押在这上面 泰德
Well, I wouldn't bet
the farm on it, Ted.
说到农场 接下来
And speaking of farms,
coming up...
一匹马和一只猫之间
an unlikely friendship
between a horse and a cat
出人意料的友谊 你绝对不能错过
that you have to see to believe.
收工
And we're clear.
肯 新发型真好看
Love the new hair, Ken.
要不是我知道 还以为是你自己的头发呢
If I didn't know any better,
I'd think it was your own.
本来就是我自己的 嘿 泰德
It is my own.
Hey... Ted!
泰德
Ted!
杰瑞 再次谢谢你让我宣传邀请赛
Hey, thanks again for letting me
promote the Invitational, Jerry.
哇 该谢的是你
Whoa, I should be thanking you.
现在大家都用手♥机♥看天气
Not a lot of people watching
weather reports on TV
没多少人看电视天气预报了
when they get weather
on their phone.
是啊 我觉得他们更愿意听
Yeah, I like to think they care
about hearing their weather
专业人士播报天气
from a trained professional.
哦 泰德小子 他们是在乎你
Oh, Teddy boy,
they care about you.
是吗
Yeah?
你当初愿意给我机会也是因为这个吗
Is that why you
took a shot on me?
知道吗 都无所谓了
You know what?
It doesn't matter.
事实是 你给了我机会 别人都没有
The fact is, you did...
when no one else would.
我很感激你
And I appreciate you for it.
其实我的初衷没那么纯粹
Well, my intentions weren't
as pure as they might seem.
哦
Oh?
观众圣诞节期间也喜欢看
Viewers also like tuning in
around Christmas to see
你身上会发生什么糟糕的事
what could go terribly wrong.
是啊 是啊
Yeah, yeah.
我仍然认为 “圣诞老人播报天气”
I still maintain that
'Santa does the weather'
会是个很棒的环节
would have been a great segment
要是烟囱再宽一点就好了
had that chimney been
a little wider.
嗯嗯 嗯嗯
Mmhmm. Mmhmm.
嘿 WDTB 电视台给你打电♥话♥了吗
Hey, did WDTB
give you a call yet?
打了 其实今天早上打的
Yeah. Actually they
called this morning.
那你答复他们了吗
So, did you give 'em an answer?
没有
No.
没有吗
No?
嗯 这事得好好想想 我是说
Oh. It's a lot to think about.
I mean they're the state's
他们是城外最大的电视台
biggest network
outside the city.
不过我在这很开心 你们就像家人一样
No, I'm happy here.