辣妈辣妹2（2025）

Why do I sound like this?
变怎样
Sound like what?
美国腔
American!
很好 妈
Oh. Good. Mom.
什么声音
What was that?
噢
Ow! Oh. Ow!
莉莉 你还好吗
Lily, are you okay?
我不是莉莉
I'm not Lily.
你是哈珀吗
Are you Harper?
不是
No.
不
No. No. No, no, no.
我快要腐烂了 天啊
I'm bloody decomposing! Oh, my.
哈珀
Harper?
欧买♥♥尬
Oh, my God. Whoa.
怎么回事 我知道
What is happening? I know.
哈珀 我是妈
It's me, Harp. It's Mom.
你说什么
What are you saying?
如果你是我 我是你 那她是谁
So if you're me and I'm you, then... then who is that?
我是外婆 甜心
I'm Grandma, sweetheart.
天啊 我死了
Oh, my gosh! I've died.
我自寻死亡了
I killed myself!
她满脸皱纹
She just has crevices all over her face.
看这些裂痕
Look at the crevices.
我的手好像洋娃娃手
My hands look like doll hands.
我的屁♥股♥好翘喔
My butt feels so high.
我好像闪尿了
I think I just peed a little.
不会吧
Oh, no.
我的脸干巴巴的
My face feels so thirsty and dry.
我的脸完美无暇
My face is perfect.
我的脸像是被遗忘在大太阳下
My face looks like a Birkin bag
晒烂的柏金包
that's been left out in the sun to rot.
为什么
Why?
我怎么又想尿尿了
Why do I have to pee again?
这比上次更诡异
This is so much weirder than the last time.
上次 什么上次
Last time? What last time?
你怎么没跟我说过
How come you never told me?
我们谁都没说过 甜心 吃隔夜燕麦
We never told anyone, sweetheart. Overnight oats.
我们停下来换个角度想
Now let's just pause and reframe.
我不想跟你们家有关系
No. I didn't want to be a part of this family
现在居然扯上你们家族的诅咒
and now I'm part of some dodgy family curse?
我还是最老的 妈
And I'm the eldest? Mom.
她的嘴唇呢 她没有嘴唇
And where are her lips? She has no lips!
跑去哪了
Where did they go?
该怎么解决
How do we fix this?
上次我们交换回来
Well, you know, last time, we switched back
是因为从对方的角度看事情
when we saw things from the other's perspective.
该牵手吗
Should we hold hands?
牵我的手 我们能
Hold my hands. Well, we can--
对
Just... Yeah.
我对你和艾瑞克很严厉
I know I've been hard on you and Eric,
现在我发现你做得没错
but I can now see that you're doing the right thing.
妈 你为我付出好多 我明白
And, Mom, you have always done so much for me, and I see you.
我明白
I see you.
你真的明白吗 真的
Are you really seeing me? Mm-hmm. I really see you.
我没有感觉
Because I don't feel anything.
你不知道我现在多努力明白
You have no idea how hard I'm seeing you right now.
一 二 三 三
One, two, three. ...three.
孩子 那没用
Girls, that doesn't work.
上次试过了
Yeah, we tried that last time.
长这副模样
Looking like this
难怪你这种人足不出户
is why people like you become shut-ins,
这口音又是怎样 番茄儿
and what's with this accent? "Tomato."
你觉得我讲话是这德行
Is that what you think I sound like?
欧买♥♥尬 对
Oh, my God, yes.
你讲话就是这样
Of course this is what you sound like.
我们去贵妇超♥市♥ 我才没有买♥♥免疫增强剂
Let's go to Erewhon... I do not sound like that.
我没说过 没听过贵妇超♥市♥
I've never said that. I don't even know...
我得打给能量治疗师
Then I need to call my energy healer
重置我的脉轮
because I need a chakra reset.
对 你说话就这样 治疗师
That's what you sound like. The healer.
珍夫人
Madame Jen.
我以为她是灵媒
I thought she was a psychic.
我以为她帮狗狗做声频浴
Ow. I thought she did sound baths for dogs.
我以为她是品水师
I thought she was a water sommelier.
她还想卖♥♥刀子给我
She did try to sell me knives.
什么 不管她是谁
What? No, well, whatever she is,
我们得找到她 在那之前
we have to find her, but until then...
在那之前怎样
"Until then" what?
上次交换回来前
Last time we convinced everyone
我们瞒过了大家
that we were each other until we switched back.
好棒棒 我们要怎么做到
Oh, brilliant. So how are we supposed to pull that off?
惊慌失措一点帮助也没有
Well, panicking is not going to help anyone!
快去换衣服 烂透了
I need you to get dressed. This sucks!
快去 不 住口
Go. Go get- No! Stop.
拜 一定很棒 妈 太烂了
Bye, girls. It's going to be great.
听着
Look, Mom.
我在她们面前故作镇定
I kept it totally together in front of the girls,
老实说 我现在超糗的
but I have to be honest, I am freaking out right now!
这样叫故作镇定
That was you keeping it totally together?
对
Yes!
没事 确认一下
No, no. Just checking.
灵光摄影师
Aura photographer.
她线上商店打八折
Hmm. Twenty percent off on her Etsy shop.
我不能结婚
I can't get married.
我连男友都没有
I haven't even had a boyfriend yet.
我们得把身体换回来
We have to switch back to our bodies.
至少你的身体没带着关节炎醒来
At least your body didn't wake up with arthritis.
不通
It's disconnected.
她的生涯辅♥导♥生意大概收了
I guess her life coaching business went bust.
这周末我要结婚
I'm supposed to get married this weekend.
这什么
What are these?
一个人需要几件羽绒衣
And how many puffer jackets does someone need?
灵气治疗师 怎样 发现什么
Hmm. Reiki master. What? What'd you find?
我弯下身子却没放屁
I bent down and didn't toot.
让年轻人拥有青春好浪费
Youth really is wasted on the young.
每个口袋里都有旧面纸
And what's with the old tissues in every pocket?
解释一下
Explain.
灵气治疗没人接 怎么办
No answer at Reiki. Now what?
你试过她的素肉饼餐车吗
Did you try her vegan meat loaf truck?
他们没电♥话♥ 只用富胖达
They don't have a number, and they only use DoorDash,
我不会用
and I don't know how to do that.
我看来跟魔法阿妈一样老
I look Eileen Fisher years old.
我简直就是我妈
I'm literally my mother.
我这辈子都得做心理咨♥询♥
I'm going to need therapy for the rest of my life
不是我外婆那种
and not the kind from Grams.
而是要付钱的正版咨♥询♥
Like the real kind that you have to pay for.
怎么有人穿这种鞋
Why does anyone wear these?
她有说什么算命的东西吗
Did she say anything, like a fortune?
没有 也许她有跟孩子们说
No, but maybe she told the girls.
灵媒有帮你们算命吗
Did the psychic say anything to you about a fortune?
那可能是解决的关键
It could be the key to getting out of this.
等等 她有吧 有
Wait, she did, right? She did.
她说什么
What was it?
改变错误的心意
"Change the hearts you know are wrong
抵达你所属之地
to reach the place where you belong."
那是指我们父母结婚的事
That's about our parents getting married.
洛杉矶 伦敦
LA. London.
身为青少年 我们没有实质权力
As teenagers, we have no power.
对搬家没说话的份 但身为成年人
No say in whether we move or stay, but as adults...
妈 她没对我们说什么
Mom, she didn't say anything to us!
噢