上班族妈妈

Workin' Moms S02E05

Part 1 March 15, 2020, 6:37 p.m.

《职场老妈》前情提要
Previously on "Workin' Moms":
如果今天你能跟我们一起去宣讲就再好不过了
It would be great if you could join us at the pitch today.
我很想去的
I'd love to,
但我得去接孩子
but I have to pick my kid up.
朋友们这是凯特
Everyone, this is Kate.
她是我们新来的创意顾问
She's our new Creative Consultant.
你当了多久作家了
So, how long you been a writer?
5分钟吧
Like, 5 minutes.
布拉德你怎么在这
Brad, what are you doing here?
我想我们是隔壁房♥
Guess we're neighbours.
今天我想大家讨论下同意权的问题
Today I'd like to dive into the issue of consent.
现在的同意权简直不可理喻根据最新规定
Ugh, consent today is insane. According to the new rules,
莱昂内尔看我一眼都得经我同意
Lionel basically needs consent to even look at me.
这太扫兴了对吧
Ugh! Such a buzz kill, right?
我想放松警惕背靠着冰箱
I wanna be taken off guard, you know? Up against a fridge,
嘴里含着根萝卜
with like, half-eaten carrot in my mouth.
没错或者来点陌生人强制戏码
Yeah, or a little bit of stranger danger like,
这个在更衣室对我用强的是谁
who's this person cornering me in the change room?
我原本想讨论的是
I had intended that we discuss consent
和孩子的同意权
in relation to children.
但你们说的也有趣
But you know, this is fun!
也很让人费解
It's also confusing.
比如如果内森死了但愿不要...
Like, what if Nathan were to die... god forbid...
最终经过好长一段时间
and eventually, after a respectable amount of time,
-我开始和别人交往 -好吧
- I'm bangin' someone new? - Sure!
他多久就得向我征求一次同意权
How frequently does he have to ask for consent?
这可是个灰色地带
Oh, it's a grey area.
就比如说我采用背入式四肢着地
Well, say I'm takin' it from behind, I'm on all fours,
-感觉越来越燥热 -在桌上
- it's gettin' hot. - Table top.
我的表情说要可他不知道
My face is saying yes, he don't know that.
他要不要拍下我肩膀确认一下
Does he have to tap my shoulder, do a double-check?
-对着镜子 -如果三人行呢
- Mirrors? - Or what if it's a threesome,
每个人都得同意才行吗
does everybody have to consent?
你们谁试过三人行
Who here is having a threesome?
等等抱歉我有些问题
Wait, sorry, I've got some questions.
我最近刚刚和个女生约会
I just recently started seeing this girl.
没错我得经她同意才能碰她吗
Yeah, so do I need permission to touch her?
-没错 -没错
- Yes. - Oh yeah.
是的
Yes.
-好吧接吻呢 -当然要了
- Okay, um, kiss her? - Absolutely!
好吧所以我基本上连呼吸都得经过她同意
Okay, so I just basically need permission to breathe.
你是要在她身上呼吸吗
Are you breathing on her?
在你们牵手前你最好要个签名
I would get a signature before you hold hands.
职场老妈
第二季第五集
别别
Come on, come on.
大家好这是在开茶会吗
Hey, we havin' a tea party?
这是要搞园艺吗
Oh, are we planting a community garden?
我们在微量嗑药
We're micro-dosing.
是个新客户吗
Is that a new client?
一个小的制药公♥司♥吗
A tiny pharmaceutical company?
你真逗伙计
You're hilarious, man.
不是我们刚吃了微量的迷幻蘑菇
No, we're just taking small doses of mushrooms.
这样才能调动起你的贝塔波
It's the secret to maxing out your beta waves.
孕妇除外来喝点水
Except for preggers over here, a water!
调动起来太棒了
To the max then, cool, cool. C-cool.
-你还好吗凯特 -我没事
- Are you okay, Kate? - Mm hmm, yup.
早餐没吃够
Just wish I had a little bit more breakfast,
但我没事我真没事
but I'm sure I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm okay.
你从没试过微量磕药吗凯特
Have you never micro-dosed, Kate?
不我磕过
No, I've micro-dosed.
很多次了但我从没嗑多过
A lot, yeah, and I've never um, overdosed
你得小心了别嗑多了
that's the one you want to avoid.
没错伙计
Yeah, dog.
你们很怀念学校那种
You guys miss the day at school
互相分享的校园生活啊
where they taught ya how to share?
我们觉得这么很高效
We find it incredibly effective here.
少来点就能让我们...
Just a little bit, get us thinking...
凯特悠着点
whoa, Kate! Be caref--
我们通常给茶里放点
We usually put a little in tea.
我知道原因了
I can see why.
算你厉害
Like a boss!
请稍等
Just a sec!
给我的吗
Really? For me?
只想当个友善的邻居
Just being a good neighbour.
你怎么样安顿好了吗
How are you uh, settling in?
我很好
I'm good.
万事顺利
Everything's great,
除了隔壁发出的怪异声音
except for those very strange voices coming from next door.
我这周好像有三次没抽成烟
I think I quit smoking three times already this week,
拜你所赐
thanks to you.
怎么回事伙计催眠疗法又是什么
What's up, man? What's up with the hypnotherapy?
你以前可是个正儿八经的心理医生啊
You use to be a real psychiatrist!
我保证它可以帮人们解决实际问题
I assure you, it resolves some very real issues for people.
你有什么解决不了的问题吗
Have you ever had a problem you just couldn't kick?
你应该没有暴饮暴食的问题
I mean, you're clearly not overeating.
但是你最近焦躁吗
But have you had any anxiety recently,
或者注意力难以集中
or I don't know, a hard time focusing?
可能稍微有点失眠
I mean, maybe a little trouble sleeping.
要不你今天下午来我办公室一趟吧
Well, why don't you swing by my office this afternoon.
当真吗
Really?
好吧
Oh okay, sure.
只要不让我像鸡一样咯咯叫
I mean, as long as I don't come out clucking like a chicken.
催眠术不是闹着玩的安妮
Hypnotism's serious, Anne.
这是我分居以后
This is the first date that I've been on
第一次出来约会
since my separation.
-是吗 -是啊
- Oh yeah? - Yeah.
-我应该试试... -好的
- I should probably try it just... - Yeah.
-好 -喝吧
- Yeah. - Go ahead.
这是我和达米安的一次大摊牌
So this is like the major showdown with Damien.
他就像是保姆集体里的恶霸好吧
He's like the bully of the nanny's group, okay?
其实他照看的那个小孩也很坏
In-in fact, actually the baby he cares for is also a bully.
所以达米安...
Right, so Damien...
觉得理论上联盟很不错
Damien, he's all like, yeah, unions are great on paper--
我想到一个好玩的给我
I've got a better idea. Give me this.
好吧
Okay, all right.
-我能吻你吗 -当然
- May I kiss you? - Uh, yes.
好
Okay.
我能...
Can I um...
我能摸你的胸吗
can I put my hand up your shirt?
别闹了
Stop.
好吧抱歉
Oh, okay, sorry.
等等你要问我吗
Wait, are you gonna ask me...
因为我同意你随意脱我的衣服
Or 'cause you totally have consent to take my shirt off
-如果你想的话 -你怎么这么奇怪
- if you want to. - Okay, this is weird.
等等
Wait, no, no, no, no.
对不起我做了什么你不同意的事吗
I'm sorry. Have I done something non-consensual?
-并没有 -等等
- Unfortunately, no. - No, wait, please...just...
对不起
I'm sorry.
我在托儿所的时候
I was in Toddler Time,
被他们洗♥脑♥了同意权这玩意
and they-they filled my head with all this consent stuff.
你为什么要在托儿所讨论咱俩的事
Why were you talking about us in Toddler Time?
-我要走了 -好吧
- I'm gonna go. - Okay.
家用硬件
Hardware for Homes...
我们的眼界要放宽一点
Okay, we need to think bigger here, guys.
家用硬件是我们最大的客户
Hardware for Homes is our biggest client.
等等...比如说什么是家
Wait... like, what is a home?
太疯狂了
Is that crazy?
地球就是个大家庭
Earth is like a home.
你知道地球有71%都是水吗
Do you know it's 71% water?
是真的写在黑板上
It's true, put it on the board. Put it on the board.