前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes
第三季
剧集 | 前夫总动员（2011） | 导航列表
前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes S03E11
Part 2
March 18, 2021, 1:36 p.m.
兄弟 我要来根烟
Man, I need a smoke.
《前夫总动员》第三季 第十一集
给你我的最新发明
I give to you my latest creation,
伊比利的火腿香肠
Jamon Iberico y Chorizo.
这道菜起源于西班牙地区的
This dish hails from the Spanish region
拉里奥哈...
of La Rioja...
世界最好的火腿之乡...
Home of the world's finest ham...
并且很有趣的是...
And as an interesting...
你♥他♥妈♥倒是给我啊
Just give me the food!
原谅我想着去充实
Forgive me for trying to nourish
某个人的身体以及大脑
the body and the mind.
感觉怎么样?
So how is it?
噢 斯图尔特
Oh, Stuart.
斯图尔特
Stuart.
你做得简直是太好了
You are amazing.
你们好
Hello.
我觉得你们应该想要知道
I thought you'd like to know
我和伊登已经和好了
that all is good between me and Eden,
再次证明了友谊这种东西
proving once again that friendship
的确是相互的
is indeed a two-way street.
她道歉了 然后我原谅了她
She apologized, and I forgave her.
哦 菲尔
Oh, Phil.
哦 菲尔!
Oh, Phil!
他们又来了
There they go again.
我更喜欢他们当初偷偷摸摸做这事的时候
I for one liked it better when they were sneaking around.
要更安静些
It was a lot quieter.
整夜整夜的 我们听到的都是
All night, all we hear
伊登愉悦时的尖叫声
are Eden's squeals of delight.
听起来就像动画城里的狂欢
It sounds like an orgy in toontown.
- 终于完了 - 还没呢
- Finally, it's over. - Not yet.
- 你是怎么知道的? - 知道什么?
- How'd you know that? - How'd I know what?
那个狂欢还没结束
That the party wasn't over yet.
因为我们都是女人 我们都是这样做的
Because we're women. That's what we do.
就是这样了 先生们 拜拜了
It's how it's done. Good day, gentlemen.
不要走这么快嘛 妹子
Not so fast, sister.
有情况哦
Something's goin' on here.
- 什么都没有好吧 - 好的
- Nothing's going on. - All right.
要不你现在说出来 要不当她下来喘口气时
Then you spill it or we talk to squeaky
我们当场问她
when she comes up for air.
好吧 但是你们要答应我
Okay, but you have to promise me.
你们不会告诉伊登我向你们说了这些事
You won't tell Eden I said anything.
如果发现你们知道了的话她会杀了我的
She'd kill me if you knew.
仅仅是你这样想就已经伤害了我
The fact that you would even think that wounds me.
好的
Okay.
呃 伊登有时候...
Well, Eden sometimes...
偶尔...
Occasionally...
然后?
Yeah?
在极少发生的情况下...
Once in a very blue, blue moon...
是装的
Fakes it.
什么是装的?
Fakes what?
难不成是装胃痛逃掉体育课么
A stomachache to get out of gym.
还能是什么?
What do you think?
你还是不懂 对吧?
You still don't get it, do you?
完全不懂
Not a clue.
伊登假装她在和菲尔做♥爱♥时达到了高♥潮♥
Eden fakes her orgasms with Phil.
- 你们好 - 你们好
- Hi, hi. - Oh, hi.
你好
Hi.
我都不知道你在这里
I didn't even know you were here.
是吗? 我甚至还在耳鸣
Really? 'Cause my ears are still ringin'.
- 菲尔! - 什么?
- Phil! - What?
什么? 我只是很高兴所有的事都公开了
What? I'm just happy everything's out in the open.
所有人都知道了一切
Everybody knows everything.
是的 我们的确知道
Yes, we do.
- 再见 伙计们 - 再见 伊登
- Bye, guys. - Bye, Eden.
我希望你们不会介意
Hey, I hope you don't mind me
- 我一直在这里打扰你们 - 当然没有
- Being around so much. - Oh, of course not.
有女人在这里的感觉还不错
It's nice having a woman around here.
你看斯图尔特不就在么
Besides Stuart.
我很抱歉昨天晚上有点吵
Hey, so I'm sorry if it got a little loud last night,
但是如果你一直做得好的话
but when you keep knockin' it out the park,
人们总会发出些声音来的
the crowd's gonna make some noise.
或者那些是别人装出来的
Or the crowd is faking it,
因为想要翻个身睡觉了
'cause it wants to roll over and go to sleep.
哈斯克 小声点 他会听到你的
Haskell, hush. He'll hear you.
就是说给他听的
Well, maybe he deserves to.
也许我们的"冠军"只是处在低谷期
Maybe the champ is just in a slump.
如果我能看他们的录像我就会知道了
It would help if I could see the game films.
好了 现在 听我说
Okay. Now, you listen to me.
我们已经向霍利保证过了 我们要信守承诺
We made a promise to Holly, and we're gonna keep it.
再说 难道你想知道
Besides, would you have wanted to know
你的前妻是否假装达到了高♥潮♥吗?
if your ex-wife faked her orgasms?
嘿 她在这段时间里
Hey, what she did on her own time
做了些什么完全是她自己的事
was her business.
我的前妻从来不用假装
Well, my ex-wife never had to fake it.
不是说我很粗俗 但是我的确知道
Not to be coarse, but I knew exactly
如何可以让她感到脸红心跳
how to put the blush in her cheeks.
也许只是你自己这样觉得而已
Or you thought you did.
女人是世界上最会演戏的人
Women are the greatest actors on earth.
"噢 斯图尔特
"Oh, Stuart.
这感觉真是太好了
It's so good.
你太棒了"
You're amazing."
等等
Wait a minute.
我知道那句"噢 斯图尔特"
I know that "Oh, Stuart."
那和你吃我做的东西时发出的声音一模一样
That's the same voice you use when you eat my food.
- 不 不是 - 是的 绝对是这样
- No, it isn't. - Yes, it is.
你... 噢 我的天啊
You... Oh, my God.
你一直在对我假装"食物高♥潮♥"
You've been faking foodgasms with me.
不是吗? 不是吗?
Haven't you? Haven't you?
好吧 也不是每一餐
Well, not every meal.
我的意思是 只是在极少发生的情况下
I mean, just once in a... in a blue, blue moon.
你怎么可以这样?
How could you?
我很抱歉
I'm sorry.
并不是每道菜都能让我达到"食物高♥潮♥"的
Not every dish gets me there.
你们在争论些什么?
What are you two arguing about?
我以为哈斯克喜欢我做的饭
I thought that Haskell liked my cooking.
结果他只是在骗我
It turns out he's been faking it.
斯图尔特 真的吗? 你没能分辨出来?
Stuart, really? You couldn't tell?
"噢 斯图尔特
"Oh, Stuart.
噢 斯图尔特!
Oh, Stuart!
噢!"
Oh!"
- 你就是个天真的小伙 - 哦 是吗?
- You're one naive little dude. - Oh, yeah?
伊登所谓的高♥潮♥是骗你的
Well, Eden fakes orgasms with you.
- 天啊! - 什么?
- Jeez! - What?
你们从哪里听来的?
Where did that come from?
伊登告诉了霍利 霍利又告诉了我们
Eden told Holly who told us.
伊登为什么要说这些?
Why would Eden say that?
我是说 当和菲尔·切斯在一起时
I mean, no woman has to fake an orgasm
没有任何女人需要假装高♥潮♥
when she's with Phil Chase.
但是当然 我不应该告诉你们这些的
But of course, I don't have to tell you guys that.
不 不 当然不应该
No, no, of course not.
我说正经的 如果只有一件事我会做的话
I'm serious. If there's one thing
那就是去满足一个女人
I know how to do, it's satisfy a woman.
我收到过花束
Okay, I've gotten flowers,
香槟 还有iPad
champagne, an iPad.
我甚至收到过纸条写着
I've gotten notes that said,
"菲尔 感谢你带给我的高♥潮♥"
"thank you for the orgasm, Phil."
是的 你是国王
Yeah, you're the king.
你这见鬼的小瘪三 我就是国王
You damn skippy I'm the king.
嘿 伊登 有什么事吗?
Hey, Eden. What's up?
我给你买♥♥了一件小礼物
I bought you a little present.
- 真的吗? - 这是一条友谊手链
前夫总动员（2011）
The Exes
剧集 | 前夫总动员（2011） | 导航列表