接生公（2015）

Could you look just in case?
你们能看看吗 以防万一
We don't just have babies randomly turning up
我们这里又不会随便冒出一堆宝宝来
all over the hospital, do we, Bunting?
搞得满医院都是 对吧 Bunting
No, that's, erm... I don't... I'm not...
不 那是 呃 我不 我不是
I don't think I've, not quite, erm... no. Good heavens. No.
我不认为我已经 不是很 呃 不 苍天呐 不
It's just the thing is, as I was telling Natasha,
只是吧 就像我跟Natasha说的
I do suffer from somnambulism - I walk in my sleep
我的确患有梦游症 我睡觉时会乱走
and I sometimes do odd things, and I leave things in odd places.
我有时候会做奇怪的事情 把东西放在奇怪的地方
Do you? And you mentioned that to Tash?
你有吗 而且你告诉Tash了
Yes... I once wrote a poem on my husband's laptop
是的 我曾经在我丈夫的笔记本电脑上写了一首诗
and then I put it in the freezer.
然后我把它放到了冰箱里
I've got his little bracelet.
我有他的小手环
Your husband wears a bracelet?
你丈夫戴手环
Erm... no, the baby's ID. I was probably doing loom bands.
呃 不 是宝宝的身份证明 我大概是在做织布带吧
Anyway, he can't have gone far, can he?
总之 他不可能走太远 对吧
Erm... this is very puzzling, Mrs Nicholson.
呃 这很令人困惑 Nicholson夫人
Certainly a missing baby would have turned up by now,
当然 如果有失踪的宝宝 到现在怎么着也该出现了
we would have obviously informed you, is that not right?
我们也肯定会通知你了 不是吗
Mm-hm, yes, absolutely, Mr Edward, that's,
嗯哼 是的 当然 Edwards医生 那个
erm... I can't, can't think of a...
呃 我不能 想不到一个
I will just go
我现在就去
and have a quick little look in lost property. Yeah.
失物招领处看看 好
Have you see a baby at all? Quite a few.
你有看到一个宝宝吗 看到了蛮多个呢
Oh.
哦
Right...
好了
Where did she put the baby? Which baby? Hubbard!
她把孩子放哪儿了 什么孩子 Hubbard
In the cupboard. Durr.
在壁橱里啊 废话
Not the mother, where has Pat put it now?
不是说他妈妈 Pat现在把他放哪儿了
Oh, right, well, Ian, he wanted to get him measured up
哦 对 Ian 他想给宝宝量好尺寸
for a tiny little police uniform in case there was a photo shoot.
给他做一套迷你小警服 以防要拍照
And Pat took him back.
然后Pat把他带回来了
Mrs Nicholson, did she or
Nicholson夫人 她有
did she not tell you she was a somnambulist?
还是没有告诉过你 她是个梦游症患者
No... Oh, wait, yeah, yeah,
没有 哦 等等 是啊 是啊
she did because I was going to Google it
她有 因为我本来想谷歌♥一下
and then I found this clip of a cat
然后我发现了一个猫咪从
falling off a thing and then I forgot.
一个东西上面掉下去的视频然后我就忘记了
Oh, my God, Tash! What the hell is going on?
我的天哪 Tash 这到底怎么回事
Mrs Siddiqui could hear you all the way down in theatre
Siddiqui夫人在手术室都能听到你们
and she's under general anaesthetic.
她还被麻醉着呢
Mrs Nicholson walks in her sleep.
Nicholson夫人会梦游
She took Hubbard,
她带着Hubbard
put him in the cupboard and went back to bed. Is that all?
把他放到壁橱里然后回去睡觉了 就这些吗
I thought we'd got one of those three layered lemon cakes again.
我还以为我们又收到那种三层的柠檬蛋糕了
Later on, when you least expect it,
这之后 在你最不经意的时候
I'm going to kick you really hard in the shin.
我会狠狠地踢你的小腿
Well, should we give him back, then?
那我们应该把他送回去了 对吧
No, I think we should put him on eBay I mean now.
不 我觉得我们应该把他放到eBay上卖♥♥掉 我是说现在
Yeah, or maybe we could wait two or three weeks for a laugh
是啊 或者我们应该为了好笑再拖延两三个星期
Come on, let's reunite Mrs Nicholson with Hubby.
好了 让Nicholson夫人和Hubby重聚吧
Oh, has her husband turned up, then?
哦 她的丈夫出现了吗
No, no, he's flying in from Paris or Poland...
不 还没有 他正从巴黎或者波兰飞过来
somewhere beginning with P... P, Pa-a-a...
是个以P开头的地名 P Paaa
Helsinki!
赫尔辛基
Ow! You said later.
嗷 你说了之后再踢的
It is later.
现在就是之后
There you go, Mrs Nicholson, safe and sound.
给您 Nicholson夫人 安全无恙
Thank you so much, officer. Oh, please, Ian.
太感谢您了 警官 哦 拜托 叫我Ian
I feel really stupid.
我觉得自己好笨
Don't be silly. It's just lucky
别傻了 幸亏
I've my highly trained eyes and ears on red alert at all times.
我训练有素的眼睛和耳朵时时刻刻保持极度警戒
We're blessed to have such
我们很幸运能有这么
a quality of staff on call day and night.
高水准的雇员日夜待命
Thank you... sorry, I don't know your name.
谢谢 抱歉 我不知道你的名字
Matthew. Matthew. Thank you, Matthew.
Matthew Matthew 谢谢你 Matthew
I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't get
你要是没得到某种
some sort of commendation. Well done, Ian Hanwell. Whoo.
嘉奖的话我会很吃惊的 干得好 Ian Hanwell 呜呼
How did you find him exactly?
你具体是怎么找到他的
I just, erm... heard a little noise
我只是呃 听到了一点声音
and opened the cupboard and there he was.
打开柜子然后他就在那里
He wasn't distressed or anything. Aw.
他没有不高兴或是怎么的 噢
Yeah, he was just standing there, you know, on the shelf...
是啊 他就站在那儿 你知道的 在架子上
hands on hips, kind of thing. What?
双手叉腰 差不多那样子 什么
OK, I think it's probably time for a nap,
好的 我想是时候睡一觉了
yes? Supervised, obviously.
可以吗 有人监督的 当然
OK, I found some pictures of your husband on Facebook
好的 我在脸书上找到了一些你丈夫的照片
and I worked with those but then I added my own special sauce.
然后我根据那些开始创作 不过我又加了一些个人色彩进去
Oh, my God!
噢我的天哪
Oh, wow, Pat, you've achieved something I never thought possible.
哦 哇哦 Pat 你达到了一种我认为不可能达到的境界
You've got me thinking my ex husband
你让我觉得我前夫
was maybe not that bad.
可能也没那么糟糕
I still get paid, though, right?
你还是会付我钱的 对吧
Yes, yes, and I will pay you extra
是的 是的 我还会多付你钱
just to take your dark and terrible gift and seal it up.
只要能把你暗黑又恐怖的天赋永远封存住
Never paint again, Pat, never again.
不要再画画了 Pat 再也不要了
Ok?
好吗
You sound just like those women in labour, "Never again",
你和那些正在生孩子的女人说的话一样 "再也不要了"
but you'll soon be thinking of having another painting.
但是你很快又会再想要另一幅画
Oh, I've never seen such horror.
哦 我从来没见过如此恐怖的东西
Everything all right? Oh. Fine! Fine.
一切都还好吧 哦 没事 没事
Yeah, that was really kind,
是啊 那真的很好心
what you did for Ian. Oh, no, not really.
你为Ian做的 哦不 并没有啦
Yeah, it was, well, it was kind of kind.
啊 是真的 是有点好心啦
Yeah, well, I was going to say that so...
是啊 我本来也想说的所以
Yeah, well, I said it first so...
是吗 那是我先说的所以
Well, but you said it in a shallow sort of a way.
但是你说的方式很肤浅
No, I said it in a deep way.
才没有 我说的很深沉
Well, maybe not deep, but it wasn't shallow.
呃 也许不是深沉 但是绝对不肤浅
I said it at a normal depth.
我是用正常的深浅说的
Anyway, that was really kind of you, Matthew.
不管怎么样 你那样做真的很体贴 Matthew
Oh, please. Excuse me?
哦 拜托 你说什么
That was just sickly. OK, I'll see you...
那简直病态 好的 待会儿见
Oh, bye. Bye.
哦 拜 拜
"Oh, bye-e-e-e." Don't say it like that.
"哦 拜" 别那样说
What? I'll say it however I want. You're not the boss of me.
干嘛 我想怎么说就怎么说 你又不是我老板
Hello, I so am, look, read the badge.
拜托 我太是了 看 读读这个胸章
Boss of you. Oh, well, at least I was not like,
你的老板 哦 那好 起码我不是像那样
"Bye-e-e-e, Matthew!"
"拜 Matthew"