纯粹

纯 洁 强 迫 症 第一季 第六集
玛妮
今晚有什么安排
我的思想很肮脏 而且所有人都知道了
I've got a dirty mind and everybody knows it.
操
Fuck!
玛妮
M-M-M-Marnie...
我要擦掉水龙头上的羞耻
Just scrubbing the shame off the taps,
吸走地毯上的悔恨
hoovering some regret off the carpet
清理掉上周的可怕回忆
and cleaning up the general horror of last week.
我打扫了公♥寓♥
I cleaned the flat.
也该打扫了
Yeah, it needed it. Mm.
-我找到工作了 -漂亮
- And I got a job. - Oh, well done.
你去参加安珀的派对吗
Are you going to go to Amber's party?
我们可以一起去
Cos we could go together,
因为你认识的人不多
and seeing as you don't really know that many people...
可能不去了
Probably not.
等会厨房♥见
Right, I'll maybe see you in the kitchen later.
我感觉整整一周都没怎么看见你了
Er, I feel like I've hardly seen you all week.
我一直在上班
Er, I've been working.
我得炒了凯伦 临时管♥理♥员♥太多了
I had to let Karen go. There's been a lot of interim admin.
我也不是一直都对人友善
I'm not always nice to people.
我说过对不起了
I said sorry.
我们能...
Can we just...
回到以前的样子吗
..Go back to how things were?
我住在那个壁橱里已经很不舒服了
Cos I'm uncomfortable enough as it is in my cupboard.
-或许你不适合住那儿 -不 我喜欢那个壁橱
- Er, maybe it isn't working. - No, I like the cupboard,
我也没有那么不舒服 我都习惯了
and I'm not even that uncomfortable. I'm used to it.
反正我都是蜷成一团睡觉 那让我心安
I sleep in a ball, anyway, and it's comforting.
不
No, um...
或许你该搬出去
Maybe you should move out.
为什么
Why?
你说过等你站稳脚跟就会搬出去的
You said it was just until you got yourself sorted.
不是因为你的病
It's not because of your disorder.
你特地提到 让我感觉你就是因为这个
Well, you mentioning it kind of makes it seem like it is,
要不你为什么要说起
cos why would you bring it up if it's not?
感觉就像是站在一具尸体旁说
It's just like standing over a dead body and going,
-"不是我杀的"一样 -是因为你
- "It wasn't me!" - It's because of you!
是因为你 还有你和人相处的方式
It's because of you and the way you are with people.
我怎么对待别人是因为我有强迫症
How I am with people is because of my OCD.
这个病让我变成了一个烂人 除非我变更好
It makes me a shit person and I'm going to be shit
否则我会一直烂下去 问题是要到什么时候
until I'm better, so, it's just like, when is that?
我已经接受了三个疗程了
Cos I've had three sessions now
我原以为我会比现在感觉好点
and I thought I was going to feel better than this.
你说的"变得更好"是指什么
What do you think being "better" means?
等我没了那些念头 不再思考它们的意义
I'll be a better person when I don't have these thoughts
不再思考自己是谁 我就会变成更好的人
and wondering what they mean and who I am.
但问题不是你有那些念头
The problem isn't the thoughts, though.
是那些念头带给你的感觉
It's the way they make you feel
以及你为此产生的羞耻感
and the shame you have about them.
所以我们需要找到方法
That's why we need to find a way
让你能换一种心态接受这些想法
for you to have a different relationship with them.
我不想接受它们 我希望它们消失
I don't want a relationship with them. I want them to go away.
这才是我来这的原因 我花钱是为了这个
That's why I'm here. That's what I'm paying for.
人类就是会产生荒谬的想法
Having absurd thoughts is part of being human.
只有脑死亡
If you got rid of them completely
才能彻底摆脱这些想法
you'd be brain-dead.
我只是希望你告诉我 这些念头什么时候能停止
I just want you to tell me when they'll stop
我什么时候能好起来
and when I'll be better,
好让我不用再担心自己会孤独终老
so I can stop worrying about dying alone
因为我是个大烂人
cos I'm such a shit person.
治疗不能帮你除去你的想法
Therapy is not going to help you get rid of your thoughts,
你越是不想去想 你就越是会想起
and the more you try to do that, the more you'll have,
你就越会感到压力
and the more distressed you'll get.
所以我永远摆脱不了它们了
So I'm always going to have them?
我知道你想要一个确切的回答
I know you're looking for a definitive answer.
但我会变得更好的 对吗
I AM going to get better, though?
抱歉 这我不能保证
I'm sorry. I can't, I can't give you that.
我以为你不会留下来过夜
I thought you weren't staying.
我知道 我肯定是不小心睡着了
Yeah, I know. I must've just fallen asleep.
这是正常的人类生理反应
Well, it's a natural human response.
不怪你
I won't hold it against you.
我们今天干什么
So, what shall we do?
我不知道你有什么安排
Oh, I don't know about you,
但我现在要走了 去上私教课
but I'm going to go and do a HIIT class.
-我不用上私教课 -你应该试试
- I'm not doing a HIIT class. - Well, you should.
不管了 你想参加我的生日派对吗
Fuck it. Do you want to come to my birthday party?
什么时候
When is it?
就在今天
Today, actually.
生日和派对都是
Birthday and party.
那你在这干什么
What're you doing here, man?
你就这个时间有空
Er, it was the only time you could do.
你想来吗 还是...
So, do you want to come, or...?
为什么
Why?
因为伦敦人都不守约定 我不想只有我
Cos people in London are flakes and I don't want it to be just me
和另外四个人♥大♥眼瞪小眼
and four others staring at some fucking Gs.
好吧 还有谁会去
Right, who's going to be there?
很多人
Loads of people, you know?
同事 不是同事的人
Er, people from work, people not from work.
还有...在你家住的人
People from...your house?
我不知道 只是
I don't know, it's just...
有点太正式了
..A bit much.
我不是特别邀请你
I don't WANT you to come.
只是凑人数 所有人我都会邀请
It's just for numbers. I'm asking everyone.
包括我的...配色师
I'm asking...my colourist.
我们还是下周再约吧
But we should catch up next week.
好吧 再约
Yeah, catch up.
我还以为你不喜欢咖啡
I thought you didn't like coffee.
我上过一个咖啡师 现在我自己也是咖啡师
I slept with a barista, now I'm a barista.
有点像嬉皮士之间互相性传染病
It's like a hipster STD.
你不该跟他分手的
You should've stuck with him.
那他还能教你几招
He could've given you some tips,
因为你完全不知道自己在干什么
since you have absolutely no idea what you're doing.
-我培训了半天呢 -培训什么
- I've had half a day's training! - As what?
这个吗
As this?
老天
Fuck's sake...
玛妮 我来吧 没关系 交给我吧
Marnie, just let me do it. It's fine. I'll do it.
你去收拾下 可以吗
Can you just clear, please?
把那位女士点的麦芬蛋糕给她
And take that lady her muffin?
别 我需要这份工作
Don't. I need this,
否则我就也是个无家可归的苏格兰人
otherwise I'm just another homeless Scottish person.
抱歉 我这话真是偏见
Sorry, it's such a stereotype.
如果你遇到难处 可以暂住我那儿
You can always crash at mine if you get stuck.
你确定吗
Are you sure?
也许会有点尴尬 毕竟上次我去你家时
It might be a bit awkward, because last time you asked me over
你把老二掏出来了
you showed me your cock.
那我收回刚才的话
I take it back then.
你会去安珀的派对吗
Are you coming to Amber's?
我约好了要见莎拉
Er, I'm meant to be seeing Sarah.
你该带她一起来
You should bring her.
-我不确定她想去 -真的吗
- I'm not sure she'll be up for it. - Really?
我还以为她可愿意和年轻人一起玩了
I thought she'd love a chance to hang out with the kids.
不 她宁可在家和我做♥爱♥
No, she'd rather stay in and have sex with me.
那么
So...
是不是意味着你好点了
..Does that mean you're better?
-有点改善了 -所以你喜欢去做毛毡
- Getting there, yeah. - That's why you go felting.
更年期女人能帮你解决问题
Menopausal women do it for you.
一定是了
They must do.
希望这次也能成功
Hope it works this time.
嗯 会的
Yeah, it will.
会的
It will.
-那我先走了 -祝你顺利
- I'll leave you to it. - Yeah, have a good one.
-好的 -行 回头见吧