基和皮尔（2012）

I mean, you got the Bat Mizzles, you know?
市面上还有很多黑人团队比如"犹年礼"
Oys to Men, you know?
"大人犹太双拍档"之类的
派对热场员
马库斯·"犹陀士"·坎宁安
派对热场员
莱纳德·"犹鱼饼"·杰佛里斯
It's supposed to be a simcha.
真正的意义应该是带来欢乐
You just really can't put a price on the look on your child's face
孩子们第一次见到黑人时脸上的表情
父亲 纽约长岛
大卫·施瓦茨曼
when they see a black person for the first time.
是用钱也买♥♥不到的无价之宝
It's...It's just magical, really.
一切太不可思议了
Is he getting back up or what?
他还会爬起来还是晕倒了
We are not technically chosen.
严格上来说 我们不是被顾客选上
We're chosen by the chosen.
是被神所选上的神选之人
Which is kind of better than being just the chosen.
当神选之人其实比当神爽多了
That's right. It's less responsibility.
没错 我们肩上没这么多责任
Jews are like black people,
犹太人跟黑人差不多
但这里在恶搞他们也互相歧视的事
都是受到压♥迫♥ 也常被歧视的民族
but we were black people
但我们是在黑人
before there were black people.
被"黑"之前就被人"黑"了
Um... well, I guess that's not true.
其实这么说也不对
They were just in a...
当时我们只是在
different part of, uh, the world.
世界上不同的角落当"黑人"
Oh, black people coming to get me! Help!
黑人要来抓我啦 救命啊
We find it spiritually intoxicating,
干这行 我们精神上会上瘾
we find it culturally fascinating,
文化上让我们着迷
and we find it monetarily exhilarating.
金钱上让我们满足
When we say Sarah you say Schwartzman
我们说"莎拉"你们说"施瓦茨曼"
Sarah! Schwartzman.
莎拉 施瓦茨曼
Sarah! Schwartzman.
莎拉 施瓦茨曼
Yeah! There you go, yeah!
赞啦 这就对了
I mean, the fact that we're willing to put
我觉得我们在业界无人可及
forth the extra time is what sets us apart.
是因为我们愿意多花四倍的功夫
I mean, how often is a 13-year-old
你们想想 一个13岁的女孩
gonna hear their own name?
能有多少机会听到别人喊自己名字
We learn that name. We rehearse it.
我们用心记住 还反复排练那名字
Go Daniel! Go Daniel!
丹尼尔 丹尼尔飞高高
Go Daniel! Go Daniel!
丹尼尔 丹尼尔来一发
Judaism can be a very somber religion.
犹太教可以是一个很严肃的宗教
That's right. You know, something we learned
的确 在我们干这行的学习过程中
along the way is that the word "ghetto"
我们发现"街头"这个词
means something very different to these people.
在黑人与犹太人眼里有天壤之别
对犹太人而言是指犹太强制集中居住区
对黑人而言是指街头/贫民窟
To tell you the truth, I was a little nervous about the whole thing.
老实说 我其实一开始挺担心这事的
No, not because they were black,
不是因为他们是黑人
but because you never really know
是因为你永远搞不太清
what those kind of people are gonna do.
他们这种人类会做什么事
If we can add some fun, some life, some color
我们可以在一个犹太人还年轻时
to a Jewish person's life when they're still young--
为他们生命增加点乐趣 活力 与色彩
They might not grow up and run away from black people
或许他们长大后看到黑人时
when they see them. No, maybe they won't...
不会想拔腿跑 或许就不会了
Or, uh... Fire people so willynilly
或者... 莫名其妙就炒人鱿鱼
when they're older.
等他们长大后当老板时
We provide a service to these people.
我们为这些人提供了一种服务
We motivate parties.
我们为派对暖场
That's we do.
我们就是做这个
That's we do. We motivate parties.
我们为派对暖场[带来激励]
So we're fascinated with movies these days,
现在的这些新电影很让我俩着迷
because movies have gone crazy.
因为现在的电影太疯狂了
Oh, yeah. They have the 3D,
是的 现在电影有3D画面
amazing effects, amazing sound.
超赞的效果 超赞的音效
They spend so much money, and it looks so good.
他们砸了超多钱制♥作♥ 画面看起来超棒
Why can't they just get the simple right, though?
但他们他妈为什么不能把简单细节做好呢
You know what I'm talking about?
你们懂我的意思吗
The next time you go to a movie,
你们下一次去看电影的时候
when you watch somebody on the phone,
当你们看到影片中人打电♥话♥
I guarantee you they will not say good-bye.
我跟你们保证 他们绝对不会说"再见"
Yes. It won't happen.
没错 绝对不会有
"Honey, I promise you that I will be home
"宝贝 我保证为了你跟孩子
for you and the kids on Thanksgiving."
我绝对会赶回来跟你们过感恩节"
You can't...
你不能...
You can't get away with that.
你不可能不被人追杀打回来啊
You never see the scene
你永远不会看到
where somebody calls back talking about...
对方打电♥话♥回来说...
"Why'd you hang up on me?"
"你为什么挂我电♥话♥"
"Oh, I was just... What?
"我只是... 你说什么
I didn't... What are you talking about?"
我没... 我不知道你说的是啥"
Or my favorite is after a shower, or love-making,
或者我的最爱 是洗澡或做♥爱♥完
how come every person in the film, when they get out,
为什么电影里的所有人 当他们出来时
just immediately put this... Towel, towel.
都能瞬间包上... 浴巾 浴巾
Talking about in your own house by yourself!
你想想你自己一个人在自己家的时候
No.
就不会这样
I get out of the shower, I'm ass-naked
当我走出浴室 绝对是光着屁♥股♥
all over the place. Yes!
到处溜达 对啊
Oh, dude, if I'm home alone,
如果我自己一个人在家
I will put my balls on a bookshelf.
就要把我蛋蛋晾书架上之类的
I don't care.
我才不管别人
I'll just make something up because I can.
自己家想干嘛干嘛 我没事也得找事
Please! No!
求求你 别杀我
No!
别啊
No!
不要
What-- What's the joke?
笑... 笑点在哪里
What?
什么
I-I don't get it.
我不懂哪里好笑
Man, you shot that damn fool!
兄弟 你射死了这傻♥逼♥
Yeah, no. I still don't get it.
不懂 我还是没懂笑点
Hey, man, ain't nothing to get.
没啥需要懂的啊
This shit is just funny, man.
就是单纯很好笑啊
Dude can't snitch now.
这逼这下不能告密了
Man, don't fake laugh.
你别假笑啊
That's not real. I can tell.
你不是真心在笑 我看得出来
No, I think it's really funny.
没有啊 我真的觉得好笑
No, you don't.
屁 你才没有
Look at him! Sitting there all dead.
你看他 坐在那死得不能再死
He was 20, and now he's dead.
他享年二十 就英年早逝
Ain't never gonna have a wife or kids now.
此生绝不可能有老婆孩子了
Man, what are you doing? Wife and kids?
你干啥提这个呢 还老婆孩子
That shit ain't funny.
这不好笑啊
His mom and dad ain't never gonna see him again.
他的父母再也见不到他了
No. No.
不 不对
You're ruining it for me.
我兴头全被你搞没了
Okay, well, I guess I just don't get it then.
好吧 我就是真的没懂笑点在哪嘛
It's just that you shot him.
就只是你射死了他啊
That's all! That's the whole thing!
就这样 没别的了
Oh, okay, so...
好吧 那...
The hell is wrong with you?
你♥他♥妈♥脑子被驴踢啦
You don't shoot a dude that's already dead!
怎么可以开枪打死人呢
That's not funny!
这不好笑啊
Yeah, I guess I just don't get it.
我想我这辈子都不会懂这笑点
So you have to tell every human being in the world
这世界上有一条潜规则就是
that their baby is cute whether it is true or not.
当看到别人家的婴儿 可不可爱都得说可爱
You just have to.
必需得称赞
Keegan-Michael Key, nicest guy in the world,
基根·迈克·基 世上第一好人
just outed himself as somebody who doesn't
就在刚才当着大家的面说
find all babies cute.
他不觉得所有婴儿都可爱
Well, I mean, what am I supposed to do?
不然我还能怎么样
Go down the street, you know,
在路上走着
you see a lady with her stroller.
一个推着婴儿车的女人迎面走来
"Oh, hi." And you peer in,
"你好" 然后你往车里一瞧
and there's just, like, an infant body
然后里面就是个婴儿身体
and then Steve Buscemi's head. Yeah, you don't...
但史蒂夫·布西密脸的婴儿 这没办...
基本上长得像真人版的鬣狗
知名男演员 《大西洋帝国》的男主角