呆逼还愿人（2014）

Deadbeat S02E09

Part 1 April 16, 2021, 3:09 p.m.

第二季第九集
可以再来点薯片吗
Chip please?
呃如果这家伙能吃东西的话
Ugh, if this thing can eat,
是不是意味着它也会...
does that mean it can also...
卧♥槽♥(拉屎)
Shit.
这不可能
This cannot be right!
- 怎么了 - 哦没啥
- What's wrong?- Oh, nothing.
我只是在额计算
I'm just, uh, crunching
一些讨人厌的数字
some numbers over here
如果我没算错的话
and if my calculations are correct,
情况比我们想的可要严重的多
it is way worse than we ever imagined.
小苏我必须得找份工作了
Sue, I might have to get a job.
- 大包啊啊 - 抱歉
- Blob! Ah, ahh!- Sorry!
你你在做什么大哥
What... what are you doing, man?
你怎么搞的我们谈论过这种事
What are you doing? We discussed this!
不准在对方的女朋友面前拉便便
No shitting in front of each other's girlfriends.
我以为我们已经达到了共识老兄
I thought we were on the same page, buddy.
给我滚去窗外拉完
Go finish up out the window.
天呐
God!
女朋友
Girlfriend?
额
Well...
我是么我们是吗
I... is it? Are we?
凯文我很愿意做你的女朋友
Kevin, I'd love to be your girlfriend.
真的么
Really?
嗯
Mhm!
太好了
All right!
嘿我们做点有趣的事怎么样
Hey, why don't we do something fun
这周末
this weekend?
是啊我也很想小苏
Yeah, I would love to, Sue,
但我真真是没钱能做什么事了
but I literally can't afford to do anything.
额你有多少钱
Mm. How much money do you have?
十美分
Ten cents.
凯文这是一美分
Kevin, that's a penny.
噢见鬼
Oh, damn it!
我得重新再算一遍了
I have to redo all this now.
等下我有办法了
Wait, I have an idea!
小苏你真是个绝世天才
You are a god damn genius, Sue.
货真价实啊呜哈哈
A real G-D-G. Woohoo!
这样吧你盯着
All right, you keep your eyes out
那个穿蓝色衣服的家伙
for the boys in blue,
我去捞点银子花
I'm gonna go grab the cheddar.
什么? 不凯文这是许愿池
What? No, Kevin, it's a wishing well.
神... 神马
A... a what?
许愿池
A wishing well.
把硬币放在手心
Take the penny in your hand,
闭上眼睛许个愿
close your eyes, make a wish,
然后扔进去你的愿望
throw it in, and your wish
就会实现啦
will come true.
好吧
Okay...
好了然后呢
Okay, now what?
只用等着就可以了
Now we wait.
不不是傻站这儿
No, not here.
- 不在这 - 它会自然实现
- Not here?- It'll happen later.
比萨上来点巧克力酱棉花糖
The s'mores on the pizza!
好美味呦!
Nice to meet ya!
我就要吃掉你啦!
I'm gonna eat-za you!
谁呀?
Herro?
嗯就是我什么事呀?
Yeah, this is he. What?
好的我马上就到
Yeah, I'll be right there.
比萨上来点巧克力酱棉花糖
S'mores on the pizza!
好美味哟
Nice to meet ya!
谢谢您能还算快地赶来
Thank you for responding semi-promptly,
派克刘咕噜先生
Mr. Pacalioglu.
额其实老实说
Yeah, well, you know, to be fair,
我打给我的时候
you called me literally right
我正在切我的棉花糖比萨呢
as I was sliding a s'mizza in the oven,
所以这得怪你啦
so that's kinda on you.
我想你应该知道
As I'm sure you're aware,
多沃弗酒店是曼哈顿
the Dalworf is one of the finest hotels
最好的酒店之一
in Manhattan.
我们的顾客想要
Our guests expect
最顶级的奢华享受
the highest standards of luxury.
任何质量上的偏差不论多么微小
Any dip in that quality, however small,
都是绝对不允许的!
is an absolute travesty!
而且是多沃弗酒店盛名
And a smear on the good name
上的一个污点!
of the Dalworf Hotel!
是绝不能接受的
It's unacceptable;
这可特么的是多沃弗酒店啊!
this is the Dalworf for fuck's sake!
抱歉我用词过激
I do apologize;
我们现阶段压力很大
we're under a lot of stress at the moment.
没事你没必要道歉
It's okay; no apology necessary.
顶层的套房♥正在闹鬼
The penthouse suite is being haunted.
这绝对是一场噩梦啊
It's an absolute nightmare in there,
而48小时后就会有客人要入住
and we have a guest arriving in 48 hours.
我现在可以给你
I'm willing to give you
500美元
500 dollars right now
赶走那个鬼魂
to get rid of this ghost
在我们的VIP贵宾来之前
before our VIP guest arrives
这周末之前
at the end of the weekend.
VIP 哈是我认识的人吗?
VIP, huh? Anybody I know?
我不能随意透露顾客信息
I'm not at liberty to say who.
这是不礼貌的
That would be uncouth.
是 Mayor Meyer吗?
Is it Mayor Meyer?
相信我你绝对猜不到
Trust me, you'll never guess.
是James McAvoy吗?
Is it James McAvoy?
赶紧干活吧
Just get it done.
明白
Gotcha.
有人么!?
Herrooo!?
有人在吗?
Herro?
高级酒店客人?
Fancy hotel ghost?
是高级酒店叫我来的
Just got a call from the, uh, fancy hotel.
他们说你就在这
They said you were up here
你的行为像是个大煞♥笔♥
being kind of a dick.
嘿煞♥笔♥!
Hey, dick!
我不知道你做了什么煞♥笔♥的事
I'm not sure how you were being a dick.
这地方看起来太棒了
This place looks awesome.
噢天呐噢小苏
Oh, my God. Oh, Sue!
你怎么你在这干什么
What are you... what are you doing here?
其实我在想着我们说要度假呢
Well, I was thinking about that vacation,
而你又需要钱所以我想
and you need money, so I thought
这是个一石二鸟的点子
I'd kill two birds with one stone.
哦所以这儿有鸟鬼喽
Okay, so there are ghost birds in here?
- 不是 - 它们在哪?
- No!- Where are they?
我就是那个鬼
I'm the ghost!
是我让这间套房♥闹鬼的
I'm the one haunting the suite!
- 噢 - 这样的话你就能得到钱
- Oh.- This way you get paid,
- 并且我们能自己享受这个套房♥啦
and we get the suite to ourselves
整个周末哦
the whole weekend.
小苏这是偷窃行为
Sue, that is stealing.
还有这简直太他丫有才了
Also, it's fucking brilliant.
- 太赞了 - 是吧?
- Yeah!- Right?
而且你看看那是啥
And, check it out.
我的天呐
Oh my God.
是我想的那样吗
Is that what I think it is?
是的
Yes.
高档酒店的浴袍
Fancy hotel bathrobe.
哦，我的天哪! 哦，苏!
Oh my gosh! Oh, Sue!
这样的长袍是给国王或者王子的吧！
Robes like this are for kings and princes!
现在我就像他们其中一人一样。
And now I'm one of them.
哦它就像穿着一件
Oh, it's like wearing a jacket
乳液做的夹克一样