呆逼还愿人（2014）

Deadbeat S02E07

Part 5 April 16, 2021, 3:08 p.m.

But, hey, on the bright side, you know,
你我可以有更多时间一起出去玩了
you and me can hang out a lot more together.
我们可以一起解决些实际的鬼魂问题
We can do some real ghost cases.
艹!
Fuck!
什么？不是别...
What? No. Don't...
别这样! 别别!
Don't do that! No, no!
你知道然后我们也许可以
You know, then we can maybe join
参加一场父子负袋赛跑比赛
one of those father-son sack races
你说过的那种?
you were talking about?
父子负袋赛跑比赛是个什么鬼?
What the fuck is a father-son sack race?
这实际上根本讲不通!
That doesn't even physically make sense!
这又不是两人三腿跑
It's not a three-legged race;
这也不是麻袋跑
it's not a sack race.
所以这是个什么玩意儿？
So what is it?
我猜是为你的坚果袋子设计的比赛?
I guess it's a race for your nutsacks?
或者把你的你的坚果放到袋子里?
Or you put your nuts in a bag?
我也不知道!
I don't know!
好吧
All right.
我要回洛杉矶了
I'm going back to LA.
哦你什么意思啊? 你不是才来了嘛!
Oh, what do you mean? You just got here!
我来这儿
I only came here
只是为了那鬼知道的电视节目!
for the goddamn TV show!
你一直都知道这个事儿?
You knew about that the whole time?
我读了同行
I read the trades.
什么同行？
What are the trades?
它们是演艺圈的杂♥志♥!
They're the showbiz industry journals!
我不知道这个! 我刚入圈
I don't know that! I just got into showbiz.
知道它对我来说太早了
It's early for me.
那闹鬼的公♥寓♥是怎么回事儿?
What about the haunted apartment?
我只是租了闹鬼的公♥寓♥
I only rented that haunted apartment
这样我就有借口
so I would have an excuse
缠着你了你个傻♥逼♥
to bond with you, ya dumb fuck.
那... 那那些河豚又是怎么回事儿?
What about... what about the blowfish?
河豚又是怎么回事儿?
What about the blowfish?
哒哒!
Ta-da!
这是书上最老的把戏了
Oldest trick in the book.
什么书?
What book?
我不敢相信我居然养了个这么好骗的小孩
I can't believe I raised such a gullible kid.
嘿
Hey.
你为什么盯着什么都没有的地方看?
Why are you staring at nothing?
因为我失去了所有东西
Because I lost everything.
什么意思啊？
What do you mean?
嗯我猜刚开始
Well, I guess first off,
是我的电视节目被砍了
my TV show got cancelled.
这还挺好笑
So that was fun.
然后我的父亲就告诉我
And then my dad told me
他在这儿唯一的原因
that he was only here to be
是想上那个节目
on that TV show,
扔了一片鱼在我脸上
threw a piece of fish in my face,
然后说我太好骗了然后就走了
and called me gullible, and left,
所以我也失去了他
so I lost him too.
我猜在那一刻我只是觉得自己是
And I guess at the moment I'm just feeling
一个又大又胖还很蠢的失败者
like a big, fat, idiot loser.
不要这样说了!
Stop that!
你不是一个蠢货或者失败者
You're not an idiot or a loser.
你是一个有宽阔胸怀的好人
You're a great guy with a big heart
还乐于助人
who helps people.
那些自己帮不了自己的人
People who can't help themselves.
还帮助鬼魂
Ghosts.
你不需要用一个电视节目
And you don't need a TV show
来证明这些
to prove that.
而且你也没有失去所有的东西
Besides, you didn't lose everything.