妙房东与俏房客（1963）

什么让你以为不是幻觉 淫♥虫♥?
What makes you think so, you worm?
首先他叫我萝缤
First, he calls me Robin.
那不管用 他就按名单叫下去
Then that doesn't work, he goes right on down the list.
谢丽尔 艾丽卡 莫妮克 丽姿
Cheryl, Ericka, Monique, Liz.
艾琳 我求你
Irene, I beg you,
告诉我我叫到"艾琳"时发生什么?
tell me what happened when I got to "Irene"?
在那时候 你这大猩猩
By that time, you big ape,
我拼尽全力才忍♥住没打烂你的醉鬼头
I had all I could do to keep from braining you, drunk or sober.
萝缤 听老马识途的女人一句忠言
Robin, take the advice of an older and wiser woman,
现在就收拾好东西离开这里
pack your things and get out of here now.
等等 我是这里的房♥东
Wait, just... I'm the landlord around here.
你是告诉我我没有...
You mean to tell me that I didn't...
闭嘴 别打扰我们!
Shut up and leave us alone!
这对我非常重要 出去!
This is very important to me. Out!
你是告诉我... 出去!
Do you mean to tell me... Out!
你关心他们 我的情绪稳定怎么办?
You're worried about them, what about my emotional security?
在我永远离开你们的生活之前
Before I get out of your lives forever,
我要给你们最后一次说教
I'm going to give you one last lecture.
萝缤 爱不是机械安排
Robin, love isn't a mechanical arrangement
料理好洗衣盆和烤箱
worked out over laundry tubs and ovens
以及共享浴室
and sharing bathrooms together.
爱的态度是希望彼此好
The attitude of love is to wish each other well.
为他做饭 为他织补袜子
To cook for him and darn his socks
当他生病时照顾他
and take care of him when he's sick
因为你希望他好
because you wish him well.
对你来说 戴维 是为她工作
And for you, David, to work for her,
当她犯错误时原谅她
and forgive her when she's a boob,
容忍♥你外套上的化妆品
to put up with all the makeup on your coat
以及她把汽车防护板撞的坑坑洼洼
and the car fenders she'll dent
还有她坏脾气的时刻 因为你希望她好
and her moments of bad temper because you wish her well.
爱不是突然从树上掉下来永远给你们的果子
Love doesn't suddenly drop from a tree and stay with you forever.
就像任何其他夫妻一样
Just like any other husband and wife,
你们必须培养爱
you're going to have to create love
在你们生活中的每一天
each and every day of your lives.
现在去结婚 开始正常同居吧
Now go on and get married and start living together properly.
我爱你 傻丫头!
I love you, you silly puss!
还有你要照顾好她 不然我打烂你的头
And you take care of her or I'll brain you.
呸!
Yech!
艾琳 等等 等等
Irene. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
我不想跟你说话
I don't want to talk to you.
快等等
Now, wait a minute. Come on.
结束了 你疯了吗?
It's over. Are you mad?
别挡路 臭虫! 等等
Out of my way, insect! Now wait.
为什么你昨晚回来?
Why did you come back last night?
你是怕承认 好了 好了
You're afraid to admit it. All right, all right.
我就告诉你你想听的
I'll tell you what you're just dying to hear.
我不妨一劳永逸说出来
I might as well get it said once and for all.
我过去是爱上你了 你这可怜傻瓜!
I used to be in love with you, you poor jackass!
但你从没告诉我 为什么我爱上你
But you never told me. Why I felt love for you
我永远永远也不会明白
I will never, never know.
你是骗子 酒鬼 色魔
You are a liar, a drunk, a lech,
我一辈子见过的最蠢的人之一!
and one of the most ridiculous men I have ever met in my life!
这女人生我的气
The girl is mad about me.
嗨 艾琳? 嗨 你没事吧?
Hey, Irene? Hey, are you all right?
再见 犯规席
Goodbye, sin bin.
唉!
Phew!
现在终于断舍离了 好
It's all over now, finally. Good.
艾琳 等等 等等 你不能抛弃我
Irene, wait a minute. Wait a minute. You can't walk out on me now.
她是唯一爱我的女人 爱到把我臭骂一顿
She's the one woman who ever cared enough to tell me off.
你应该听到她在里面叫我什么 美妙动听!
You should have heard what she called me in there. Beautiful!
我被千刀万剐挫骨扬灰
Cut me into little pieces and ground me right into the dirt.
有事情告诉我你会恢复的
Well, something tells me you'll recover.
从今以后你会看到全新的霍根
From this moment on, you're going to see a brand new Hogan.
我怀疑我们是否会路过
I doubt if we'll be around.
努力 努力 努力 艾琳
Work, work, work, Irene,
我们来一起做 你和我
and we're going to do it together. You and me.
再见 霍根 再见?
Bye, Hogan. Goodbye?
你和我缘尽了
You're finally out of my system.
努力 努力 努力 霍根
Work, work, work, Hogan.
但你不能现在离开我 这不公平
But you can't leave me now. That's not fair.
这不对 不对 不对 不对!
It's wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong!
再见 霍根 什么?
Goodbye, Hogan. What?
我会蜜月后再回来拿东西
I'll be back for my things after the honeymoon.
对 再见 老兄 我送给你
Yeah, goodbye, old pal. I bequeath to you
我的杠铃和高尔夫球棒
my barbells and my golf clubs.
代我告别柏拉图
Now, give my best to Plato.
- 好... - 再见
- Yeah, well... - Bye-bye.
女人个个都是忘恩负义
Ungrateful females, every one of them.
别急 又来了一个
Hold it. Here comes another one.
这是什么意思?
What does that mean?
也许你看这就明白了
Maybe this will give you the general idea.
你也要离开? 等一等
Well, you, too? Now, wait a minute.
等一等 我们就像一个团队
Wait a minute. We're like a team.
你就像我妈妈 你不要离开我
You're like my mother. You wouldn't leave me.
妈妈离开了 从今以后你自己收拾吧 快来 墨菲
Mother's left. Clean up your own mess from now on. Come on, Murph.
我很抱歉 霍根先生 这不是我的意思
I'm sorry, Mr. Hogan. It wasn't my idea.
就个人而言 你是我的大神
Personally, you're aces with me,
我真的羡慕你的生活方式...
and I sure admire the way you...
墨菲!
Murph!
我忘了我的工具 亲爱的 我在汽车站和你碰头
I forgot my tools, honey. I'll meet you at the bus stop.
快
Come on.
我会想念你 大神
I'll miss you, ace.
好吧 走吧 你们都离开我吧
All right, go ahead, walk out on me. Every one of you.
抛弃将沉的船 很好 走吧
Desert the sinking ship. Well, fine, go ahead.
谁需要你们? 我没有任何女人也过得去
Who needs you? I can get along without any of you.
我要开始过独身生活
I'm going to lead a life of celibacy.
我没有女人也过得去
I can get along without women.
小伙子?
Young man?
这公♥寓♥租吗?
Are there premises available for rent here?
从今以后 我只租给男人
From now on, I rent only to men.
你不必无礼
Well, you don't have to be rude.
我给我的姑娘们另外找地方就是
I'll look elsewhere for my girls.
姑娘们?
Girls?
唉 又来了
Well, here we go again.
你们好 我的名字叫霍根
Hello, there, my name is Hogan.
全剧终
你们小心 可要小心
Careful there. Careful now.