妙房东与俏房客（1963）

你好厚的脸皮 什么?
You've got a nerve. What?
我全部空闲时间花在帮你赢得意中人上
I'm spending all my free time trying to help you win the girl of your choice.
你还抓住细节不放 给我钥匙
You're standing on a legal technicality. Give me the key.
哦 你动不动就生气 来 来
Oh, you're touchy. Come on. Come on.
霍根 我要睡觉 不不不 你不要
Hogan, I am going to bed. No, no, no, you're not.
听着 你想娶上那位姑娘吧?
Now, look, you want to marry that girl?
我指导你怎么办
I am going to show you how.
你把火柴搁在哪里?
Where do you keep your matches around here?
在那里 我们来谈正事
There we are. Now let's get down to business.
首先 谈对象本人 萝缤
First of all, take the subject herself, Robin.
我不想要你见怪
I don't want you to take offense, son,
但那姑娘的脑筋是倒过来转的
but that girl has got her clock worked in backwards.
所以你的脑筋就转得很正常
So yours are perfectly all right.
这证实了我早先的观点
Which, confirming my earlier opinions,
就是说她其实寻觅的是
means that what she actually seeks is a man
不放纵她一切欲望的男人 你明白吗?
who doesn't pamper her every desire, do you follow?
听着 霍根 早上九点我有考试
Now, Hogan, at 9:00 am in the morning,
现在我要睡觉 好吗?
I have examinations. Now, I gotta get some sleep, okay?
你说的太对了 现在问题是
Yeah, you're darn right. Now, the problem is
如何布局 以便...
how to set the stage, so that...
听我说 后生
Now, pay attention to me, boy.
我在这领域经验丰富
I've had a lot of experience in this field.
我是葵花宝典
I'll be an inestimable help.
我怎么这么走运?
How lucky can I get?
既然可爱小甜甜无法面对她无意识的欲望
Since this dear sweet child cannot face up to her unconscious desires,
就得你来帮她容易面对无法面对之事
it's up to you to make it easy for her to face up to the unfaceable. Huh?
你说什么?
What was that again?
做得要让她看来是她自己
And in such a way as to make it seem to her that she herself,
而不是你瓦解了她的抵抗
and not you, has dispelled her resistance.
你听明白了吗? 当然 当然明白
Now, you follow that? Of course, of course.
决不要简单的上去推倒
It'd never do to simply go upstairs and attack.
她一定会心不甘情不愿
That, she'd be bound to look upon that with disfavor.
那么溜到她后面
Then how about sneaking up behind her
用氯仿手帕怎么样?
with a handkerchief soaked in chloroform?
你在说什么?
What are you talking about?
或者锁喉
Or a firm grip on a soft throat.
兄弟 我想你不是说真的吧
Brother, I don't think you're taking this thing seriously.
你一定要听我的 这是当务之急
Now, you have got to listen to me, boy. It's imperative.
给我钥匙 我给你的献策是
Give me the key. What I have planned for you
假装不感兴趣
is a program of feigned indifference.
我们应该称之为心口不一政策?
A policy of reverse English, shall we call it?
极少有活女人能抵抗得了
And hardly a woman alive can resist it.
你还有多少这东西?
Yeah, how many more of these things do you have?
供应源源不绝
The supply is inexhaustible.
问题是 你一定要
Now, the thing is, you are going to have
严格坚持这一方针
to adhere to this with strict discipline, boy.
不要有赞美
There is to be no compliments
不要有甜言蜜语进她耳朵
and no whispered sweet nothings into her ear.
不要送花 不要送糖 最重要的是
And no flowers and no candy. And most important of all,
你必须戒除所有
you must abstain from all those
女人喜欢的小节
little niceties that women adore.
你明白了吗? 我讲的太快了吗?
Do you follow me? Am I going too fast?
听起来无从反驳
It sounds irresistible.
短期这样一收拾
A short period of treatment like that
她就准备白刀子进红刀子出了
and she is primed for the kill,
如果你懂的话 你用上这东西吗?
if you get the picture. Do you get any use out of this thing?
我不明白的是你怎么设法活了这么久
What I don't understand is how you've managed to live so long.
看不见的力量保护着我
Unseen forces watch over me.
你的运气刚刚用完了
Well, your luck just ran out.
你什么意思...
What do you mean...
你怎么回事? 你为什么这样做?
Boy, what is the matter with you? Why do you do that?
你不明白我是想帮你吗?
Can't you see I'm trying to help you?
这姑娘欲♥火♥在她体内深深燃烧
This girl has got cravings and desires burning deep within her.
让她燃烧!
Let her burn!
这样的态度 无情的态度我吃不消
It's attitudes like that, callous attitudes that make it tough on me.
我还是告诉你为好 我可有病
Well, I might as well tell you, I'm sick.
什么? 我有病
What? I'm sick.
她会找我来灭火 而我病入膏肓
She's going to turn to me to put out the fire, and I'm sick of playing patsy
被中加州娘子军小分队搜刮一空后
to the entire female contingent of central California.
你... 我不能继续这样
You... I can't go on like this.
再也不能 听我说 你不懂的
Not again. Look, son, you don't understand.
马上开始你的演技
Look, start your program right away,
一旦她走出浴室
as soon as she gets out of the shower.
显示你毫无兴趣 通过把她甩给我
Show your indifference by leaving her alone with me.
欢迎光临我的公♥寓♥ 我希望你喜欢 我想要你知道
Welcome to my apartment. I hope you like it, because I want you to know
你随时可以使用
that it is available to you at any time.
我是说 你可能想来这里
I mean, you might want to pop over here
做功课 或者不受打扰睡一觉
and do some homework or maybe get some uninterrupted sleep.
我就回去一个蚊子哼哼哼
And I'll just toot along back in
继续对她关怀备至
and continue to lavish her with attention.
当然 我立刻被拉黑成床上臭肉 对不对?
Of course, that rules me out right away as a love object, doesn't it?
给 傻冒 再见
Here, simple, huh? Bye.
喂喂喂!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
小心你在抓什么大爷 小子
Be careful what you're grabbing there, boy.
* 努力磨 小魔鬼 通往幸福的钥匙 *
Grind away, you little devil The key to happiness *
求求老天
Please, God.
艾琳! 艾琳! 亲爱的 艾琳
Irene! Irene! Honey, Irene.
戴维 出了什么事 艾琳!
Dave, what happen... Irene!
怎么了? 戴维 你干了什么?
What happened? Dave, what did you do?
我打了她脑袋 什么?
I hit her on the head. What?
用东西 你怎能这样做?
With a thing. How could you do that?
我... 艾琳!
Well, I... Irene!
你能听见我吗? 她死了吗? 艾琳
Can you hear me? Is she dead? Irene.
艾琳 艾琳 醒醒 醒醒
Irene. Irene, wake up. Wake up.
可能出事了? 她冰凉了
What could've happened? She's out cold.
醒醒 艾琳 怎么回事?
Wake up, Irene. What happened?
他用东西打了她
He hit her with something.
这太荒唐了
Well, that's ridiculous.
你别管这事 霍根
You stay out of this, Hogan.
你要学会控制脾气
You gotta learn to control that temper.
我告诉你... 别喊了
I'm telling you... Stop shouting.
好 那就让他滚出去 什么?
Well, then get him out of here. What?
去拿白兰地 艾琳
Go get the brandy. Irene.
这样扑过去砸晕女人
Going around poleaxing women like that.
你怎么当成功的建筑师
How are you going to be a successful architect
如果你荣获性急的美名?
if you get the reputation for being a hothead?
这件事上你想听我的忠言吗?
You want to take my advice in this matter?
只管闭上嘴巴滚出去 霍根
Just button your lip and get out of here, Hogan.
萝缤 给我白兰地 艾琳
Robin, give me the brandy. Irene.
戴维曼宁 我不知道你怎么了
Dave Manning, I don't know what's gotten into you.
你怎能对一个弱女子这么凶暴?
How could you be so brutal to a poor woman?
我不知道是艾琳
I didn't know it was Irene.
竟然用瓶子之类的打她的头
Hitting her over the head with a bottle, or whatever it is.
我不是有意的 你以为我是什么人?
I didn't do it on purpose. What do you think I am?
我现在不确定了
I'm not sure now.
这种情况我觉得不值得恐慌
Well, I find it doesn't pay to get panicky in these situations.
女人非常耐用 你知道吗
Women are very tough, you know.
她们比你以为的要坚强得多
They got much more fiber than you think.
我可以提个建议吗? 这女人最合适的地方
Can I make a suggestion? The best place for this girl,
显然是她自己的床上
obviously, is her own bed,
所以你何不快把她抱上车送她回去
so why don't you just pick her up and take her home.
在此期间我尽我所能
And in the meantime, I'll do my level best
试着让可怜的萝缤平静
to try and calm poor Robin down.
你满脑子好主意 对不对?
You are full of helpful ideas, aren't you?
为什么你...你又来了
Why do you... There you go again.
怎么了...就是一个建议
Now, what's... A simple suggestion.
我现在要出手了 霍根
I am going to do now, Hogan,
在你一开始骚扰我们时我就该出手
what I should have done the minute you stuck your nose in our lives.
你又来了 缺乏情绪控制
There you go again, lack of emotional control.
人们会对你议论纷纷
People are gonna talk about you.