吸血鬼生活

What We Do in the Shadows S01E04

Part 1 April 19, 2020, 9:19 a.m.

化学课上助教问你怎么没来
Uh, the TA was asking about you in the chem section.
我说你有点不舒服
I said you were feeling a bit under the weather.
所以我给你买♥♥了点...这是啥
So I got you some, um, oh, what...?
欧斯里奥...
Oscillio--
欧斯克洛...
Osclio...
欧克洛
Oc-Occlio.
欧克里恩
Oak-Oaknium.
欧克里奥舒可能
Occlioscosnium.
欧斯洛...
Oscillo...
欧斯洛可舒能那才是...
Oscillococcinum, that's...
那才是正确的读法
that's the correct pronunciation, there.
那么...
So--
吃一片
Take one of those.
天啊
Oh, my God.
Siri 拨911
Siri, call 911.
-我不确定是否听懂了您的意思请您... -Siri
- I'm not sure I got that, can you... - Siri.
她昨晚还好好的
She was fine last night.
然后今早
And then, this morning,
她让我去给她买♥♥一些晚间感冒药
she asked me to go get her some Nyquil.
然后我说"晚间感冒药你是想说日间感冒药吧
And I said, "Nyquil? Don't you mean Dayquil?
因为吃了那个你会睡着的"
Because then you're gonna fall asleep."
她说 "我想要睡一天"
She said, "I want to sleep all day."
然后然后我最后买♥♥了一些欧洛舒...欧洛舒可能
And then, and then I ended up getting some oles, olescoleum.
你们这里有宿管或者是可以...
Do you have a dorm advisor or someone who can...
什么鬼
What the fuck?!
你不是说她死了吗
I thought you said she was dead!
她的脉搏为零我把了三次
Her vitals were at zero, I checked them three times.
天啊...对不起
Oh, my-- I-I'm sorry.
我很抱歉
I'm so sorry, um...
把账单寄给我吧因为我还在我爹妈的保险里
you should bill me because I'm still on my parents' insurance.
-女士你刚刚死了 -我现在没事了所以...
- Uh, ma'am, you were dead. - I'm fine now, so...
我没事了
I'm fine.
我还是觉得你该上医院看看女士
I still think you should come to the hospital, ma'am.
不了不了
No, no.
我好着呢
I'm fine.
女士你并不好
Ma'am, you are not fine.
吸血鬼生活
第一季第四集
我有没有为自己没被转化成吸血鬼而感到失望
Was I disappointed I wasn't turned into a vampire?
吉尔莫
南多的人类亲信
当然
Yes.
心碎了
Heartbroken.
但我觉得那是因为...
But I think it's because...
我得学会有耐心
I need to learn patience.
而且我主人最近对我真的很好
And my master's been really good to me lately.
看起来怎么样吉尔莫
How is it looking, Guillermo?
看起来我像是在飞主人
It looks like I'm flying, Master.
我是个吸血鬼了
I'm a vampire!
但你并不是
You are not, though.
我们拥有完全统治权
We have total dominion
从这里到这里
from here... to here.
-所以就是两条街 -我们的街和艾什莉街
- So that's two streets. - Our street and Ashley's street.
对我撒了点儿谎
Yes. I lied a bit.
实际上是从这到这里
Actually, it's from there to there.
所以我们的领土就五栋房♥子
So we have dominion over five houses?
我们得联♥系♥其他吸血鬼
We need to reach out to some other vampires.
考虑联合其他领土来保证
Consider joining dominions to secure
我们对该地区的控束
our stranglehold over the region.
-是的 -是的
- Yes. - Yes.
狡诈者西蒙是我们认识了几个世纪的吸血鬼
Simon the Devious is a vampire we have known for centuries.
我们的棺材都在同一艘
Our coffins were all together on the ship
娜嘉拉兹洛
把我们带到美国的船上
that brought us over to America.
我们过去常常藏在下面的洞里互相低声说笑话
We used to hide down in the hole and whisper jokes to each other.
爬来爬去互相挠痒享受美好时光
Crawl around, tickle each other, have a lovely time.
然后我们会爬到顶层甲板
And then we would climb up to the top deck and just
呼吸海洋空气引诱然后杀死水手
breathe in the sea air and seduce and kill sailors.
我们到了斯坦顿岛他去了曼那个哈顿
We went to Staten Island, he went to Mana-hatta.
他很快就成为了
And he very quickly became
曼哈顿吸血鬼之王
the king of the Manhattan vampires.
当时他只有107岁
And he was only 107, which--
真正的吸血鬼金童非常聪明
You know, real boy wonder. Very clever.
他没那么聪明
He's not that clever.
好吧那谁更聪明呢
Okay, who's cleverer, then?
智者斯塔夫罗斯
Stavros the Clever.
他在花♥园♥中心的木桩销卖♥♥会上
He died tripping on his cape
被他的斗篷绊倒摔死了
at the wooden stake sale at the garden center.
西蒙的总部是个很棒的夜店
Simon's HQ is this fantastic nightclub
叫曼那个哈顿的小野猫俱乐部
called the Sassy Cat Club in Mana-hatta.
20年代的时候我们经常过去玩
We used to go all the time in the '20s.
跳查尔斯顿舞
And we would do the Charleston
查尔斯顿舞美国1920-1930年代流行的一种摇摆舞
还有皮博迪舞然后会喝一些很不错的血
and the Peabody, and we'd drink some very nice blood
皮博迪舞
美国1910-1920年代由拉格泰姆时期
快速狐步舞演化而来的舞厅舞蹈
盛在一些高档的高脚杯里
from some very nice goblets.
在那儿你必须穿斗篷
You have to wear a cape in there.
对每个人都穿着斗篷
Yes. Everyone is in a cape.
如果你不♥穿♥斗篷
And if you don't wear a cape,
你会看起来像个求操的站操者
you'll look like a Fuck Me Knee-trembler.
拉兹洛好吧他没说错
Laszlo! He's right, though.
如果你不♥穿♥ 会看起来像个小婊♥子♥
If you don't, you'd look like a right little tart.
穿这身进城怎么样
How's this for the city?
不错
Oh, yes.
你看起来像一张美美的墙纸
You look like a beautiful piece of wallpaper.
还需要一件斗篷
It needs a cape.
真的吗
Hmm? Really?
对越大越好
Yeah. The bigger the better.
去拿
Run.
我们今晚要进城
We're going into the city tonight.
我们要去跑趴和跳舞
We're going to party and dance
与曼哈顿的吸血鬼结成权力联盟
and form a power alliance with the Manhattan vampires
南多
这样我们就能碾压人类了
so that we can crush the humans.
别见怪
No offense.
我找到了
I found it.
看起来怎样
Thoughts?
看起来就像是活着的
Looks like it's alive.
好眼力
Good eye.
百分百女巫皮制♥作♥而成
It's 100% witch skin.
西蒙总是很嫉妒这顶帽子
Simon was always very jealous of this hat.
我等不及想看他见我走进去时的表情了
I can't wait to see his face when I walk in.
求你别戴这顶帽子
Please don't wear that hat.
-太时髦了 -不是
- Too stylish? - No.
这是一顶被诅咒的
It's a big, bloody stupid hat with
又大又蠢的帽子
a big, bloody stupid curse on it.
你每次戴它
And every time you wear it,
就会发生一些可怕的蠢事
something bloody stupid terrible happens.
-胡说吉兹莫很喜欢对吧 -我叫吉尔莫
- Nonsense. Gizmo likes it, don't you? - It's Guillermo.
拉兹洛的蠢帽子
Laszlo's stupid hat.
那帽子被狠狠诅咒了
It's got a bloody huge curse on it.
我无数次想把它扔掉
I have tried to throw it out many times,
但它总是爬回来真的是爬回来的
but it keeps crawling back. Literally.
我是在
I acquired this hat
吸巴伐利亚海克森布雷纳的血时得到的这顶帽子
while draining the blood of a Bavarian Hexenbrenner,
或者说是巫师焚手
or witch burner.
他一定注意到我盯着帽子看了
He must've noticed me eyeing it,
因为他用最后一口气
'cause in his dying breath,
说 "拿走我的帽子它..."
he said, "Take my hat, it's cuh..."
"是啊确实很酷" 我这么想
"Yes, it is cool," I thought.
免费的帽子
Free hat.
更好
Even better.
想想发生过的所有事情
Think of all the things that have happened.