布偶演播室（2015）

The Muppets S01E01

Part 1 March 12, 2021, 2:07 p.m.

作为我前女友节目的制♥作♥人
There are a lot of challenges
要面临的困难很多
being the executive producer of a show starring your ex.
其中最大的一个问题就是我的车位在这里
One of the biggest? This is where I park.
每天都要在这里停车
Every day.
好戏开场了
Hmm. Time to get things started.
-嘿呃佩佩 -怎么啦
- Hey, uh, Pepe. - Hmm?
-你表姐的婚礼怎么样 -啊她的婚纱简直让我想吐
- How was your cousin's wedding? - Ah, her dress was "Eh."
但你懂的怀孕胖成那样
But, you know, there's not many options
也没什么别的选择了
when you're pregnant with, like, 4,000 babies.
是啊
Yeah.
呃大家早上好啊不好意思我迟到了
Um, morning, everyone. Sorry I'm late.
呃呃各位
Uh, uh, guys?
呃各位
Uh, everybody!
有人理我下吗
Hello?
呃各位我能不能
Uh, everybody, could I...
能不能注意我一下我们要开会咯
Could I get your attention? We need to get started.
嘿有人在听吗
Hello? Hello!
-不好意思克米特先生 -怎么了
- Excuse me, Mr. Kermit? - Yes?
-请让我来 -好的
- Allow me. - Okay.
这东西安全吗
Is that safe?
当然了
Of course.
我带了保护手套
I'm wearing protective gloves.
-哦 -呃好吧
- Oh. - Uh, okay.
那么各位早上好
Uh, well, uh, uh, good morning, everybody.
早上好克米特
Good morning. Kermit.
好的我我想和各位讨论一下昨晚的节目
Yeah, I-I'd like to talk about last night's show.
首先我们来说说乐队
Uh, let's start with the band.
当猪猪开始采访嘉宾的时候
Uh, when Piggy starts interviewing the guests,
你们就要停止演奏了
that is your cue to stop playing.
啊我们不知道
Ahh! Did not know that.
呃也许我们应该在日常的那种闲聊会议上
Uh, perhaps we should dismystify any further misconfusion
对于这些事情进行比较通俗的解释
with a daily confabulation-type meeting.
呃我们每天早上都有会议
Uh, well, we have meetings every morning.
你现在正在会上呢
You're in one right now.
哈这是个互助会哦
Huh? This is a meeting?
哦
Oh.
-我是左特 -哦
- I'm Zoot. - Oh!
-我的问题是...啊 -不
- And I'm... huh? - D...
-不是那种会啦 -哦
- Different meeting! - Oh.
呃来吧我们继续呃波波
Uh, moving on. Uh, Bobo.
-怎么了先生 -听着下次
- Yes, sir? - Listen, next time we do
我们再做猪猪飞跃舞台的场景时
a sketch where Piggy flies across the stage...
-嗯哼 -我觉得我们应该要选
- Mm-hmm. - I think we should choose a wire
能撑得住她吨♥位的线
that actually supports her weight.
-好的 -早该料到
- Huh. - Should have worked.
就应该选那种落锤破碎机上的绳子
It was a cable from a wrecking ball.
-恩 -我有一个问题
- Hmm. - I've got a question.
我今晚下班后要去见我未来岳父岳母
I'm meeting my girlfriend's parents after work tonight.
我要带瓶香槟吗
Should I bring a bottle of champagne?
这和我们的节目有关吗
What does that have to do with the show?
-说的对哦 -是吧
- You're right. - Yeah.
现在我有个和节目有关的问题了
Here's a show-related question.
我们厨房♥里有瓶香槟那是谁的香槟
There's a bottle of champagne in our kitchen. Is that anybody's?
其他人还有问题吗
Okay, does anybody got anything else?
-我这里有一份放送标准文件 -然后呢
- I have a broadcast standards note. - Okay.
以下不得体的词语
The following inappropriate
必须要从今晚的台本里删去
words need to be deleted from tonight's script.
-好的 -坏脾气的
- Mm-hmm. - "Crotchety."
玩弄
"Twiddle."
还有比画
And "Gesticulate."
比画呃那个
Gesticulate? Well, that...
那个词的意思就是移♥动♥你的手
That just means to move your hands.
会让人联想到握手
Which leads to shaking hands,
从而联想到造人计划的第一步
which is the first step in making babies.
这就不在我的管辖范围内了
Not on my watch!
好的我知道了哦哦各位还有一件事
Okay, got it. Oh, oh, and one more thing, everybody.
为我们拍摄幕后花絮记录的团队
Uh, the crew that's shooting our behind-the-scenes documentary
要求我们
has asked us to be more
提供更多的一对一访谈素材
available for those one-on-one interviews.
对于各位来说都没问题吧
Is that okay with everybody? Yeah?
-当然当然 -好的没问题
- Sure. Sure, yeah. Yeah. - Fine, fine.
一对一访谈这点子都被用烂了好么
One-on-one interviews? What an overused device.
你对着摄像机说出自己的真实感受
You tell the camera how you really feel,
然后被他们随意剪辑成
and then they cut back to
和你说的完全不一样的东西
you saying something completely different.
我烦死这些采访了
I hate these interviews.
我爱死这种采访了真是个好主意
I love those interviews. Great device.
恩好的
Mm. Well, good.
嘿大家好欢迎收看“猪小姐深夜秀”
Hey, there! And welcome to "Up Late with Miss Piggy"!
啊随便这节目叫什么了
Yeah, whatever.
-就这样吧 -哼
- Yeah. - Huh.
我知道你们中的一些人肯定会想
I know what some of you are thinking...
那是猪小姐吗
"Is that miss Piggy?
她是不是忘记脱毛就出门了
Did she miss her waxing appointment?"
啊哈
Ahh!
啊和大家开个玩笑啦我是福兹熊
Ah, just kidding. I'm Fozzie Bear.
我的工作就是给观众们讲笑话暖场
And it's my job to warm up the audience with jokes.
啊哈
Ahh!
我的天哪我们会被这头熊的冷笑话冻死的
- Oh, god, we're gonna die of hypothermia.
那让暴风雨来的猛烈些吧
- I hope it comes quick.
-猪小姐还有两分钟哦 -你已经美美的啦
- Miss Piggy, two minutes. - And you're all done.
哦现在好了吧
Oh, great.
我看起来就像是刚被一个半裸的夏威夷人
I look like a half-naked Hawaiian
从烤猪宴上挖出来的一样真是多谢你的巧手哼
just dug me up at a luau. Thanks a lot! Ugh!
-克米特
- Kermit!
-好的好的 -啊哦对我来说太迟了
- Okay. Yeah. - Uh-oh. It's too late for me.
-你还是自保吧 -收到
- Save yourself. - Gotcha.
克米特克米特
Kermit! Kermit!
走开走远点
Get away! Get away!
真烦人
So annoying.
你应该为你♥爸♥爸是我的干洗师而感到庆幸
You're lucky your father's my dry-cleaner.
-呃怎么了猪猪 -只是一些小事
- Uh, yes, Piggy? - Just a couple of little things.
-好的 -跟我来
- Okay. - Walk with me.
呃呃当然当然
Uh... uh, sure. Yeah, yeah.
我对于门卫居然知道我扔掉的什么东西感到很不满
I'm not happy with the janitor knowing what I throw away.
怎么了
Mm-hmm.
你能不能叫人在我的私人垃圾上
Can you have someone put a layer of generic trash
-再铺一层垃圾 -好的行铺一层垃圾
- over my private trash? - Mm-hmm. Okay. Generic trash.
-还有我更衣室里的紫丁香 -紫丁香怎么了
- And the lilacs in my dressing room... - Yeah, yeah.
-闻起来还不够香 -呃和上帝反映紫丁香的气味问题
- Don't smell lilac-y enough. - Uh, talk to god about lilacs.
哦我还注意到了明天的节目大纲上写着
Oh, and I noticed on tomorrow's rundown
-伊丽莎白·班克斯是我的首位嘉宾(*女演员曾在饥饿游戏系列中扮演埃菲） -对啊
- that Elizabeth Banks is my first guest. - Yes.
-把她的部分去掉 -哦等等
- Lose her. - Oh, wait.
猪猪猪猪伊丽莎白·班克斯可是巨星
Piggy, Piggy, Elizabeth Banks is a really big star.
恩这倒是实话
Hmm... That is true.
你知道吗去掉没得商量
You know what? Lose her!
但是但是但我呃我不能
But... but... but I, uh, can't... Yo...
哦
Ohh.
所以她对你态度怎么样好转了吗
So, how did that go for you? Okay, then?
哦
Oh.
你知道吗当猪猪还和我在一起的时候
You know, when Piggy and I were a couple,
我就发现她阴晴难定不爱考虑别人的感受而且行为古怪
I found her unpredictable and spontaneous and quirky.
不过还挺性感的
You know? It was kind of sexy.
但撇去我们的恋爱关系不谈的话她就是个疯婆子
But if you take dating out of the equation, she's just a lunatic.
啊哈哈哈哈
Ahh!
哦我要从波波我们的舞台总监一只抱抱熊
Yea... oh, I'm getting this signal from Bobo,
那里得到开始的信♥号♥♥咯
our stage manager, which means "Wrap it up!"
即使如此我还是不想被潮流的旋风变成抱抱熊
Either that or I'm about to be blown away by a tornado.
啊哈哈
Ahh!
呃每天讲的都是这几个笑话
Ugh, every night he tells that same joke.