善地

The Good Place S03E04

Part 2 Dec. 11, 2019, 3:31 p.m.

其实不是真心想看
I don't, really,
但用你们的话说我这段时间真是"空虚寂寞冷"
but I am, these days, as you might say in America, mad horny.
-懂了 -坏了
- Okay. - Boy.
我无力反驳亲爱的他确实是个小帅哥
Well, no judgments, babe. He's a straight hottie.
加油拿下杰森
You want to smash Jason, go smash.
就算塔哈妮只是随便和杰森滚个床单
Tahani getting together with Jason, even casually,
也可能会拆散四人组
could tear this group apart.
我们得把这件事扼杀在萌芽中
We have to nip this in the bud.
我觉得插手别人的事不太好
Well, it makes me slightly uneasy to interfere in the personal life of
尤其一个是我的暗恋对象一个是我欣赏的女人
the man that I'm secretly in love with, and a woman I admire,
但我尊重你的决定
but if you think we should, I--I'm not going to argue.
"扫雪机"又该出动了珍妮特
Time to break out the old snowplow again, Janet.
我们去给塔哈妮找一个帅气给力的男伴吧
Let's find Tahani a loving, supportive companion.
-好主意 -这么说吧
- Great idea. - You know?
虽然与我们的任务没什么关系
This is not as crucial to the mission,
但我还想给他们升级一下电脑
but I'd also love to arrange for them to get better computers.
加快学习进度
Help them work faster.
既然要去商场
If I'm going to the mall anyway,
那我正好趁机给杰森买♥♥几条牛仔短裤
I might as well pick Jason up some jean shorts.
毛边的那种
The kind with the frayed edges
裤口袋若隐若现
where you can see the pockets coming out of the bottom.
有助于他好好学习
So that he can study better.
有道理
Sure.
塔哈妮是你吗
Tahani, is that you?
拉里·海姆斯沃斯天呐
Larry Hemsworth? My goodness.
太神奇了
That's so funny,
刚餐厅打给我说我的外套落在这里了
I just got a call from the restaurant about a jacket I left here,
结果居然在这儿碰到了你
and now, here you are.
而你居然还记得我
I can't believe you remember me.
当然啦我们约会过呀
Of course I remember you. We dated.
是啊我就是没想到有人能记住我
I know, I just never expect anyone to remember me.
因为我才一米八
Because I'm only 6'4"
还长了一张大众脸
and I have one of those forgettable faces.
你肯定很忙吧
Well, I'm sure you're busy.
大概不想和我闲聊
Probably don't want to talk to me.
我懂换我也一样毕竟我呆若石头
I get it, I wouldn't either. I'm as dull as a rock.
这是什么破比喻
Even that analogy was boring.
抱歉我又傻又挫
I'm sorry, I'm so dull, and I'm ugly.
我像块石头拉里你个大傻子
I'm like a rock. Stupid Larry!
-别再提石头梗了 -不不不拉里先别走
- Stop talking about rocks! - No, no, no, Larry, please.
见到你真好坐呀我们聊聊
It's lovely to see you. Sit down, let's catch up.
你的"海姆斯沃斯三兄弟"还好吗
How are Chris and Liam and Luke?
抱歉我不会再提你哥哥们了
Sorry, no, I won't mention your brothers again.
但你也不能跟我提我姐
As long as you don't mention my sister.
你是谁这里的员工吗
Who are you? Do you work here?
你叫蒙哥马利·沃考夫
Your name is Montgomery Wycoff.
你前妻萨曼莎还爱着你
Your ex-wife, Samantha, still loves you,
但她没勇气打给你
but she's afraid to call.
把你写的情诗献给她快去
You must show her your poetry. Go to her.
快把她找回来
Go to her!
-看来你昨晚很"幸福"啊 -没错
- Looks like you had a good night. - I did.
你和杰森滚床单画面太美了
You and Jason. Imagine that.
我忍♥不住脑补了一下
To be fair, I have.
其实我昨天是和前男友在一起
Actually, I was with an ex-boyfriend.
我们无意中碰到了
I ran into him unexpectedly.
立马就天雷勾地火了
The reunion was a smash-ing success.
你懂我的暗示吧我们爱爱了
It was a pun, you see. The--we had intercourse.
-我懂不用解释 -但我挺不好意思的
- Yeah again, I always get it. - I do feel bad, though.
我彻底忘记要陪杰森看球的事了
I completely forgot about watching the game with Jason.
亲们你们猜怎么着
Homies, guess what?
我昨天在脸书上收到了邀请
Yesterday, I got a Facebook invite
去美洲虎队澳洲粉丝会玩了
to the Australia chapter of the Jacksonville Jaguars fan club!
他应该不介意被你放了鸽子
Yeah I think he's over it.
我和两个小伙伴看了一场美洲虎队血虐德州人队的比赛
Me and two other dudes just watched the Jags annihilate the Texans!
太爽了我彻底喝大了
It was super fun! I'm completely wasted.
我得再去吐一会儿
I got to go barf one last time,
然后就满血复活回来上哲学课
and then I'll be ready to learn philosophy!
嗷呜
Duva!
-虽然不完美但利大于弊 -同意
- Okay, not perfect, but the pros outweigh the cons. - Agreed.
六个月后
♪亲爱的奇迪生日快乐♪
♪ Happy birthday dear Chidi ♪
各位今年真是过得太有意义了
You guys, this whole year has been amazing for all of us.
我们生活的方方面面都得到了提升
I mean, literally every aspect of our lives has improved.
也没有方方面面吧
Well, I don't know about every aspect.
"超级板" 启动
SuperBoard, activate!
早上好阿纳贡耶教授
Good morning, professor Anagonye.
您的教学大纲已经准备好了
I have your lesson plan ready to go.
"超级板" 放点喜庆的音乐
SuperBoard, some triumphant announcement music, please.
昨晚拉里·海姆斯沃斯向我求婚了
Last night, Larry Hemsworth proposed to me,
我们会回伦敦准备婚礼
and we're moving back to London to begin planning the wedding.
我滴个神啊
Holy smokes!
珍妮特红色警报
Janet, red alert.
"扫雪"行动立即终止
All snowplowing has to stop immediately.
不给杰森小熊熊了吗
So don't give Blake Bear-tles to Jason?
你怎么戴得住这么大颗钻戒
How are you even lugging this thing around?
这么沉我都不一定hold得住
I'm not sure I could bench this much weight.
我们这个阶级的女孩很小就训练过戴大钻戒了
Well, girls in my social class begin ring training at a very young age.
我今晚会在"爱彼迎出租屋"举办一个小小的订婚派对
I'm throwing a little engagement party tonight at my AirBnB.
临时通知你们
It's very last-minute.
穿便装来就好了
Just come as you are.
大家的便装都这么隆重吗
I guess all these people came as they were?
各位你们能来真是太好了
Hello, everyone. I'm so glad you made it.
天啦噜塔哈妮还有这种出租屋
Holy crap, Tahani. You found this place on AirBnB?
不是我当时没解释清楚
No. I see why you're confused.
我用的是高定版
I used "HeirBnB." H-E-I-R.
专为有钱人设计
It's an app for heirs and heiresses
用于交换豪♥宅♥ 私人岛屿小型飞机场等
where we swap mansions, private islands, blimp hangars, that sort of thing.
总之各位
Anyway, everyone,
来见见拉里·海姆斯沃斯吧
I want you to meet Larry Hemsworth.
传说中的学习互助组
The legendary study group.
抱歉我好不容易才鼓足勇气见你们
I'm sorry it's taken me so long to build up the courage to meet you.
你们大概知道原因吧
I guess you can see why.
他是因为下颌性感身材完美而羞于见人吗
Is he ashamed at having a perfect jaw line, and 0% body fat?
她愿意嫁给我我现在还觉得是在做梦
Still can't believe she wants to marry me.
我只是个勉强有八块腹肌的儿科医生而已
A dumb old pediatric surgeon who barely has an 8-pack.
你真是帅不自知啊
Do you know what you look like?
还有就是
More importantly,
麦莉那首《伤心大铁球》是写给"雷神"他弟利亚姆的吗
did Miley Cyrus write the song "Wrecking Ball" about Chris's brother, Liam?
2010年利亚姆·海姆斯沃斯与麦莉·赛勒斯因出演《最后一支歌♥》相爱 12年订婚 13年分手
"真好"
Wonderful.
又一次活在了我优秀哥哥们的阴影下
More questions about my talented brothers.
为什么就不能让我当一次主角呢
God forbid there's a single day when I'm the special one.
不亲爱的别走你也很重要啊
No, sweetheart, don't go. You're important, too!
修复儿童脊柱和表演一样厉害呀
Fixing babies' spines is just as valuable as acting.
塔哈妮订了明早的机票
Tahani booked a flight for tomorrow morning,
这个派对是我们劝阻他们的唯一机会
so this party is our only chance to talk them out of moving.
也许可以放任他们去过各自的生活了
Maybe we should just let them go their separate ways, and...
但愿他们已经提升到能进入"善地"了
hope that they learned enough to get into the Good Place.
不行我们俩都知道这样的后果
No, we know what'll happen.
四人组散了他们就完了不行
The group splits up, they're screwed, no.
我们得找机会单独和拉里聊聊
We have to isolate Larry,
说服他留在澳大利亚
and convince him that he needs to stay in Australia.
该进入角色了
Time to get into character as--
今天我是内特尼尔·库克斯维尔
Nathaniel Cookswell, mate.
明星宴会承办人
Caterer to the stars!
别模仿澳洲口音了简直辣耳朵
Maybe no accent.
行吧
Fine.
吃点心吗
Vegemite canapé?
好啊
Might as well.
老妈说得对
Mummy was right.
我总是管不住自己的嘴
I'll always be the chubby one.