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以上就是这本书的主要内容
And that's what my book is about--
不再寻求别人的肯定
shedding your need for validation from others.
塔哈妮·阿贾米尔签售会之远离聚光灯
出版商说下周销量就能达到两百万
Publisher says you'll hit 2 million copies sold by next week.
-你的"582问"视频获得了英国电影学院奖提名 -有点意思
- Your "582 Questions With" video was nominated for a BAFTA. - That's fun.
-他们还想请你上《奥普拉脱口秀》 -不是已经停播了吗
- Also, they want you for "Oprah." - "Oprah" Is off the air.
不是 他们想让你取代奥普拉
No, they want you to take over for Oprah.
还有个投资人想见见你
Also, this investor wants to meet you.
我查过了 此人靠谱
I checked him out, he's legit.
塔哈妮 你好 我是戈登·因迭戈[金蓝色]Tahani. Gordon Indigo.
你的演讲实在是太鼓舞人心了
I just have to say you are so inspiring.
祝你平安
Namaste.
你真把那些笨蛋唬住了
I mean, you really have all these idiots fooled.
-你说什么 -听着
- Excuse me? - Listen.
你肯定利用这场骗局赚得盆满钵满了
I'm sure you're already rolling in dough from this incredible scam,
你想过要商业化吗
but have you thought about merch?
我们可以搭伙大发财
Because we could, we could partner here.
我通过卖♥♥"涅槃灵球"发了大财
I made a fortune selling Nirvana Orbs,
老实说
which is to say,
其实只是涂成银色的高尔夫球
driving range golf balls that I painted silver.
-太缺德了 -不 人们觉得有用
- That's awful. - No, it's healing.
机智吧
Wink.
你想卖♥♥什么都可以
You should be selling whatever crap you can think of,
因为那些笨蛋一定会乖乖掏钱
because these people will buy it.
真是够了
That is quite enough.
你凭什么污蔑我是造假骗人
And how dare you insinuate that I'm not authentic?
你的大头照我都签好了
I finished signing your headshots.
-一边去 -阿贾米尔女士 没事的
- Not now. - Ms. Al-Jamil, it's okay.
我们俩是一类人 我很欣赏你的行为
You and I are the same. I love what you're doing here.
你不用帮助任何人
You get to be rich and famous
就能名利双收
and not have to do any of the work of helping people.
但我确实在帮助大家 你快走吧
But I am helping people. You need to go right now.
随便你吧
Suit yourself.
如果改变主意 网上一搜就能找到我
Look, if you change your mind, I'm online.
关键词是 "避免勃起障碍的水晶球"
Just Google "Crystals that prevent erectile dysfunction."
抱歉
I'm sorry,
阿贾米尔女士很忙
but Ms. Al-Jamil doesn't have time
没空参加野鸡大学的道德研究
to participate in an ethical study at some random university.
如果想约见她
If you want to meet her,
可以报名参加"远离聚光灯"巡游活动
you can sign up for the "Get Out of the Spotlight" cruise,
还能见到一些特别来宾
with special guests Deepak Chopra and will.I.Am.
你好 我是塔哈妮·阿贾米尔
Hello? This is Tahani Al-Jamil.
我没想到真能联♥系♥到你
I didn't think I'd actually get you.
我叫奇迪·阿纳贡耶 我在进行一个学术研究
My name is Chidi Anagonye, and I'm doing an academic study
主题是濒死经历对道德决断的影响
on near-death experiences and ethical decision-making.
-我读到了一篇关于你的报道 -能帮助大家吗
- I read an article about you - Will it help people?
我只想知道 你的研究能帮到别人吗
That's all I want to know. Will this help people?
应该能 我们的目标就是帮助别人
Yes, I--I think so. I--I mean, that's the goal.
把具体细节发给我 我明早就到
Send me the info. I'll be there tomorrow morning.
但你怎么知道我的事情
But how had you learned about me, I wonder?
一个我从没听说过的教授发给了我一篇关于你的报道
A professor I'd never heard of named Charles Brainman
他叫"查尔斯·布莱曼"
sent me an article about you.
他说你很适合我们的研究
Said you'd be perfect for our study.
欢迎来到澳大利亚
Well, welcome to Australia.
如果你找房♥子期间需要地方借住
if you need a place to crash while you get settled,
我的旅馆有个折叠沙发
my motel has a pull-out sofa.
但是 看你的模样 高贵得像个公主
Although, as I say that, and I look at you and your whole thing,
住旅馆沙发太委屈你了
I realize that's absurd,
你还是自己找地方吧
and you should probably just get your own place.
嗯 还是这样比较好
Yes, I--I think that's best.
但还是谢谢你的好意
But--but thank you.
解决了三个 还差一个
Three down, one to go.
批准
兄弟 我一直在找你
Sup, bud? I've been looking for you.
抱歉 这些是你的石头吗
Sorry. Are these your rocks?
不是 我叫扎克·皮亚兹
No, look. My name is Zach Pizazz.
来自国际星探公♥司♥
International talent scout.
我一直在关注你的舞团
I've been tracking your dance troupe, man.
我觉得你真的很有才
I think you really got the goods.
我希望你能去澳大利亚 组建一支新团队
I want you to come on down to Australia and start a new crew, all right?
费用全包
I'll pay for everything.
你可能还得做一些额外的工作 但总的来说...
You may have a few other obligations, but basically--
谢谢你的好意 还是算了吧
Thanks, but no thanks, man.
-我不想再跳舞了 -慢着
- I'm done with dancing. - But wait.
你知道我是谁吧
You heard what my name was, right?
扎克·皮亚兹啊
Zach Pizazz?
我的生活真是一团糟
My life is just kind of messed up right now.
我去年过得很糟心
I had a really tough year.
我很遗憾
I'm sorry.
你想倾诉吗 我善于聆听
Want to talk about it? I'm a pretty good listener.
事情始于一年前
Well, my year started about a year ago.
"药哥" 我喘不上气了 我好怕
Pillboi, I can't breathe, and I'm freaking out,
我要不行了 "药哥"
and I'm almost out of whip-its! Pillboi!
早上好[意大利语]Buongiorno.
早上好[意大利语]Buongiorno.
-怎么了 -我刚才喘不上气了
- Yo, what happened? - I couldn't breathe.
一定是呼吸管坏了
The snorkel must have been broken.
太惨了
Yo, that sucks.
-你准备好进去了吗 -不行
- You ready to get back in there? - No, man.
我们不能再这样下去了
We're not doing this no more.
为了抢劫这个墨西哥餐馆 我差点死掉
I almost died trying to rob a Mexican restaurant.
我得改变生活方式了
I have to change my life.
改变
生活
方式
我知道要怎么做了
I know what I'm going to do.
我要赢得这个舞蹈比赛
I'm going to win this dance competition.
你当时没看见别的海报吗
So you didn't see any other posters there?
应该没有 怎么了
No, don't think so. Why?
没事 你继续说
Doesn't matter. Continue.
朋友们 我昨天差点死掉
Homies, I almost died yesterday.
但我们有一个重新来过的机会
But we've been given a second chance.
三个月以后
Three months from today,
在史密斯威尔森表演艺术中心兼电视台
on this very stage in the Carmen Electra auditori
就是现在我们所在的这个卡门礼堂有场比赛
right here at the Smith & Wesson Performing Arts Center and ATV Repair Shop,
我们要赢下这场舞蹈比赛
we are going to win this dance competition.
要怎么做呢 努力练舞
How, you ask? By working.
我们吃饭 睡觉 抽烟时都要想着舞蹈
We are going to eat, breathe, and vape dance.
你们要20×7的时间里都想着舞蹈
I want you thinking about dance 24/7.
其实是一周七天 每天24小时的意思 杰森根据读音误以为是twenty for seven
也就是说 每天 你们要想20次 每次7分钟
That means every day, you think 20 thoughts about dance for seven minutes.
如果你们无法保证
And if you can't promise me
全心投入舞团训练
that you'll give this dance crew everything that you've got,
那你大可以离开
then you can walk out that door.
现在就走
Right now.
好吧 我退出
Yeah, okay. I'm out.
不是吧 "傻强"
What? Come on, Donkey Doug.
我们可是共患难的兄弟啊
After all we've been through?
我们是兄弟
Listen, you know you're my boy,
但这太难了 祝你们好运
but this sounds like a lot of work. Good luck.
"傻强"出局
Donkey Doug out!
天啦噜 扎心了
Damn, that's a tough blow.
不过 既然这些人退团了
But now that those guys are no longer members of our crew,
我们就可以正大光明抢劫他们了
we can legally rob their houses.
不行 "小花生"
No, Little Peanut.
我们要通过合法方式挣钱 不再犯罪
We're going to do this the right way. No more crime,
如果你们不同意 现在就可以离开
and if you don't like that, you can walk out that door. Right now.
不是吧 大家...
What? Co-come on--
我们还有35人 开始吧
We still got like 35 people, so let's get to work.
几个月后
先宣布一个消息
Quick announcement.
车牌号♥为GOTMILF
Will the owner of a 1998 Toyota Tercel
两侧印有巨蟒的丰田雄鹰车主
with golden pythons painted on both sides,
有一个很不幸消息要告诉你
license plate GOT-MILF please see an usher.
你的车爆♥炸♥了
Your car has exploded.
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