硅谷

Well, my boss just signed Gavin Belson's pledge.
他签了 为什么
He did? Why?
因为你这个大嘴巴当着国会的面
Because loudmouths like you got up in front of Congress
抱怨多么需要有人站出来
and whined about how somebody needed to do
对大科技公♥司♥有所作为
something about big tech.
好吧 我就说过一次...
Okay, I did that one time--
现在 盖文打算把自己塑造成那个人
And now, Gavin has managed to paint himself as that guy.
我们都得认可他 不然就是公♥关♥噩梦
And we all have to fall in line, or we'll be in PR hell.
甚至更糟 会面临政♥府♥监管
Or worse! We'll face government regulation.
你看过他的宣誓书了吗
Look, have you read his pledge?
当然没有 那就是坨垃圾
No, of course not. It's trash.
第一行写着 "我们所有在下面签名的公♥司♥
The first line says, "We, the undersigned,
保证做出最大的努力..." 省略一万字
promise to make best efforts to," blah, blah, blah.
最大的努力 理查德 非常假大空
Best efforts, Richard. It's totally toothless.
没错 迈克尔 我就这意思
Yes. Exactly, Michael. That's entirely my point.
这玩意全是废话 毫无意义
It's all empty bullshit. It means nothing.
那谁他妈的在乎啊 理查德
Then who the fuck cares, Richard?
别因为一个没意义的道德准则搞砸了一切
Do not fuck this all up over a pointless moral stand!
-好吧 -把宣誓书签了
- Okay. - Sign the fucking pledge!
别再在网上发什么拇指冲着屁♥股♥蛋的了
Oh, and stop tweeting about thumbs up people's asses.
这是个文字梗
Oh. No, th-that's wordplay.
迈克尔
Michael?
多么幸运的杯子 霍尔登 亲爱的朋友
That is one lucky mug, Holden, my friend.
-你别这样了 -别哪样
- Please stop. - Stop what?
-你就想把我恶心到受不了辞职 -什么
- You're just trying to creep me out so that I'll quit. - What?
怎么会有人对你不友善呢
I mean, why wouldn't somebody be nice to you?
你是个烂人吗
Are you a piece of shit?
-迪尼希 -盖布 听着
- Oh hey, Dinesh. - Okay, listen, Gabe.
我整个航程都在简化我们的安装程序
I spent the entire flight streamlining our setup procedure,
我要开着租的车走过每一个信♥号♥♥塔
so I am gonna take the rental convertible and drive tower to tower,
检查信♥号♥♥覆盖情况 大多在未开♥发♥海滩
most of which are on pristine beaches or scenic volcanoes
或是绝美的火山 你就自己在办公室呆着吧
to check coverage while you sit at the office by yourself.
-欢迎... -不不 让我来
- Welcome-- - Oh! No! No! I get it.
给我戴上
Put it on me.
我不要塑料的
I-I don't want the plastic one.
请问您是头等...
Are you one of the first cla--
给我戴上 给我戴上 给我...
Put it on me. Put it on me. Put it--
你好呀
Aloha.
理查德 打电♥话♥有何贵干呢
Richard. To what do I owe the pleasure?
就是想... 你知道的
Just calling to, you know.
想干嘛 理查德
To what, Richard?
-签你那个玩意 -玩意 签我那个玩意
- Sign your thing. - My thing? To sign my thing?
我感觉你很缺乏诚意啊 理查德
I sense a certain lack of commitment, Richard.
我怀疑你肯将自己的名字
I mean, if I suspected the only reason
加入我的事业的唯一理由
you wanted to lend your name to my cause
是由于你那出了名的老顽固
was because of the enormous pressure you're probably facing
可能给你带来了巨大的压力
as a notable holdout, well,
我怎么能允许
how could I allow you
你的名字出现在我的技德宣誓书上呢
to add your name to my tethics pledge?
这太不...技德了
That would be... untethical.
盖文 拜托 赶紧把这事儿了结吧
Gavin, come on. Just... can we get this over with?
不过呢 一想到你公开献身我的事业
Then again, the idea of you publicly committing to the cause,
让我很快乐
that gives me joy.
理查德 我很高兴成为你的道德导师
So yes, Richard, I'd be happy to be your moral mentor.
我们仪式上见
I guess I'll see you at the ceremony.
什么仪式
What ceremony?
协会启动仪式
The groundbreaking for the Institute.
什么他妈的协会
What fucking institute?
贝尔森技德协会 我们的网站上全是
The Belson Institute of Tethics. It's all on our website.
你和其他人都会在场
You and the others will all be there
公开向宣誓书作出承诺
to publicly commit to the pledge.
另外 我还要请你再说几句话
Also, I'm gonna be asking you to say a few words.
大概就是你对我有多崇拜
Just a bit about how much of a fan you are,
要致力于我的事业 可以先讲个段子暖场
dedicated to the cause, my cause, maybe lead with a joke.
贝尔森技德协会
很高兴你能去 理查德
Be good to have you there, Richard.
在我身边保护我的遗产
Securing my legacy with you at my wing.
贝尔森技德协会
准备好跪舔吧
Wear pants you can kneel in.
内森
Hey, Nathan!
我在研读你的履历 然后...
I was, uh, perusing your file, and I just...
-什么 -抱歉 我...
- What? - Sorry. I just, um,
我在粗略研读你的履历...
I was quickly perusing your file--
研读不是这个意思
That's not what peruse means.
研读是认真仔细地阅读
Peruse means to read thoroughly and carefully.
这真是...真是...非常有用
Wow. That... that's... super helpful.
感谢你的提示
Thank you for that tip.
总之吧
Um, anyway, yeah,
我只是好奇 在罗得岛长大
I was just curious to know, like, what's it like...
是怎样一种体验
growing up in Rhode Island?
或许下次当你在认真做事的时候
Well, maybe some time when you're working on something,
我会过去打断你
I can come interrupt your flow
用错字病句讲给你听
and use words incorrectly to tell you about it.
明白了
Got it.
你有一辆丰田普锐斯吗
Oh, you own a Prius?
热门车型啊 回见 丹尼尔
Popular choice. Later, Daniel.
搞毛啊
What?
你赢了
Well, you win.
这是我见过最严重的
That is the worst case of contact dermatitis
接触性皮炎
I have ever seen.
-简直痒疯了 -没错
- The itching is so insane! - Right.
-仿佛体内万蚁穿行 -沃伦
- It's like from the inside! - Warren!
过来 我有东西给你看
Come here, I want you to see something.
这位是沃伦 实习医生
This is Warren, our resident.
这是他实习第一周
This is his first week.
沃伦 我希望你注意到
Warren, I want you to notice
病人由夏威夷花环
the violent allergic reaction
上面的鸡蛋花引发的严重过敏反应
to the plumeria flowers used in the patient's lei,
这非常奇怪
which is weird.
一般他们只提供塑料的
Normally, they just hand out plastic ones.
快想办法治好我啊
Just make it stop!
好消息是 注射一剂抗组胺药
Well, the good news is a strong anti-histamine shot
应该马上就能见效
oughta take care of it in no time.
太好了 注射 赶紧注射
Great! Yeah! The shot! Just-just gimme the shot!
注射前 我要提醒你
Now, before we proceed, I should warn you the shot,
这个药劲儿很大
it works like gangbusters,
但是可能会引起
but it does tend to cause
对太阳光强烈敏感
acute sensitivity to sunlight,
所以你要待在室内
so you're gonna wanna stay indoors
-四到六周 -什么
- for four to six weeks. - What?!
沃伦 不
Warren, no!
我们要等我解释完
We wait until after I've explained
所有可能的并发症
all the possible complications,
只有到那时
and only then,
我们才能注射
do we administer the injection.
-你刚说四到六周 -正是
- Did you say four to six weeks? - Yep.
否则你的情况会比之前更严重
Otherwise, you're gonna be back here for something a lot worse.
反正都已经这样了
All right, well...
很有教育意义的一刻吧
that was a teachable moment, huh?
-是吧 -确实
- Yeah. - Yeah. Sure.
下一个是我 你们可得小心点
I got next. And, uh, better watch out
因为我可是爆破彗星女王
'cause I am the queen of Asteroids.
-你这是要插队吗 -你不用投币
- Are you trying to cut in line? - You don't need a quarter.
这是免费游戏 傻啊
It's on free play, duh.
我懂了 你是比我们赚得多
We get it. You make more money than us.
好吧 就这么着吧
Okay, you know what?
-吉尔弗约尔 你真棒 -卡尔
- Gilfoyle, you're awesome. - Carl.
干得不错
You're doin' it.
什么鬼
What the fuck?
好兄弟
My man.
诚信 我们坚守正确的路线
"Integrity. We do the right thing.
我们致力于体现最高的道德准则