女浩克（2022）

You are glued to that thing.
我在婚礼上遇到了一位男士 他叫乔希
I met a guy, Josh, at a wedding.
我们约会过几次 我觉得进展挺顺利的
We went on a few dates. I thought it was going great.
然后我就联♥系♥不上他了
Then, I haven't heard from him.
现在我一直惦记着这件事 行了吗
Now I can't stop thinking about it. Okay?
你上次和他说话是什么时候
- When was the last time you talked to him? - Uh,
三晚以前 当时我们在...
three nights ago when we...
滚床单吗
Made love?
别那么直白
First off, ew.
没有 只是第一次睡在一起而已
No, when we'd slept together for the first time.
-你也够直接的 -够了 你们是两口子吗
- Another direct hit. - Okay, are you two married?
-说什么呢 -相互依赖啊
- Come on. - Codependency.
你们俩能和别人换个座位吗
Yeah, actually, could you switch seats with someone?
随便谁都行 好吗
Anyone?
连我都觉得有点不健康了
- It's feeling just a little unhealthy. - Mmm-hmm.
谢谢
Thank you.
你们约会过几次
So how many dates?
-三次 -最后一次发信息说的什么
- Three. - What was the last thing you texted him?
“昨天很棒 我到现在都很开心”
"That was fun. I can't stop smiling."
-天啊 -哎哟
- Oh, God. - Yikes.
-怎么了 -“我到现在都很开心 ”
- What? - "I can't stop smiling"?
显得你很饥渴 还特别庸俗
It is thirsty and a cliché.
你才又饥渴又庸俗呢
You're thirsty and a cliché.
她居然这么说我...
No, she did not just call me...
我总结一下 你还想继续 他却消失了
Bottom line. You said game on and he didn't respond.
-这不是我给他发的最后一条信息 -不好意思 你说什么
- That's not the last thing I texted him. - I'm sorry, what?
就在刚才 因为我实在太担心了 太长时间没有他的音讯了
Just now 'cause I was so worried I hadn't heard from him in so long.
-他可能出什么意外了 -那你又说什么了
- He could be in a ditch somewhere. - What did you do?
“嘿 有点担心你 只是想确认下你没事吧”
"Hey, getting a little worried. Just wanna know you're okay."
外加一个害羞小笑脸
Blushing smile emoji.
你怎么能发这个啊
Why would you do that?
我也不知道啊 我就是着急 好吗
I don't know! I was freaking out, okay?
这么做太掉价了
It's a real bad look.
我知道这很掉价 牛头人
I know it's a bad look, Man-Bull.
你不用对我的错误指手画脚 你又不是我妈
You don't have to point out my mistakes. My mom does that.
我认为最有可能的就是 他不告而别了
We have to consider the very real possibility that you were ghosted.
-也许他就是想吸你的血 -不可能
- Or he wanted your blood. - No, not that.
别老想着吸血 不是谁都和你♥爸♥一样
Don't talk about blood. We're not your dad.
不许说我爸爸
Don't talk about my dad.
兄弟 别说了
Hermanos, please.
珍妮佛 我很抱歉 我不是想刺♥激♥你...
Jen, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to talk so...
没关系
No.
遇见他的时候 我是珍妮佛 他喜欢的也是珍妮佛
I met him when I was Jen, and he liked Jen.
他根本没提女浩克
He specifically didn't ask about She-Hulk.
你们高中时都有过那种朋友吧 那种比你更酷的人
You know in high-school that friend you have that's like, cooler than you are?
比你有魅力 身材也更好 他们总是所有人的焦点
Like, more attractive and athletic. They get all the attention from everyone.
现在我就是
Hello.
你觉得如果你是那种人 生活肯定会更轻松
Like, you think life would be so much easier if I were that person,
而我现在随时随地 都能变身成那种人
and I can turn into that person anytime I want to.
变身后的我会吸引每个人的目光
And everyone pays attention when I'm this.
比如我的同事 老板 还有追求者
Like, my colleagues, my boss, guys.
可是这一切很不真实
But it feels like cheating
如果我没有这种能力 他们会喜欢我吗
because would they like me if I didn't have all of this?
如果我就是珍妮佛 那些喜欢女浩克的人
Like, if I was just Jen, would the same guys who like She-Hulk
会继续留在珍妮佛旁边吗 很多人根本不会
stick around for Jen? Because some of them don't.
这对珍妮佛很不公平 因为珍妮佛挺好的
And that sucks for Jen because Jen is great,
但是女浩克一出现 就没人在乎她了
and no one cares when they're She-Hulk.
所以当我遇到 这个喜欢珍妮佛的男人时
So, like, I meet this guy who actually likes Jen,
你们知道那种喜悦的感觉吗
and that just felt good to know that, you know?
结果我还是被甩了 太不爽了
And then, he ghosts me and it sucks.
这人就是个渣男 他住在哪
Screw this guy! Where does he live?
咱们去弄死他 他死定了
Let's kill him. He's gotta die.
哥们 冷静点
Big men, please.
不 牛头人说得对
No. Man-Bull's correct.
乔希已经引发众怒了
Josh has made an enemy of this entire group.
今晚咱们就动手
Tonight, we ride!
太棒了
That's awesome!
亚历杭德罗 我警告过你 恳谈会上不许使用生物发电
Alejandro, you've been warned about using bio-electricity in group before.
对不起
Sorry.
咱们找到这个叫乔希的家伙 我要吸干♥他♥的血
Let's find this Josh guy and suck out all his blood.
对
Yes!
不 等等 兄弟们 等一下 珍妮佛很受伤
No, wait, guys! Wait! Jen is hurting,
我们只能用暴♥力♥来安慰她吗
and all we can offer her is violence?
有谁愿意去开导一下珍妮佛呢
Does anyone think they could speak to Jen's pain
别忘了在恳谈会上 你们都学到了些什么
with the tools that we've learned in the group?
好吧 一方面 你无法控制别人的行为
Well, for one thing, I'd say you can't control what others do.
被人嫌弃确实很难受
It hurts when someone rejects us
因为那会让我们回想起 自我嫌弃的感觉
because it reminds us of the times we reject ourselves.
或许 乔希真正对你的伤害
Maybe this Josh thing hurts so much
是让你忽视了珍妮佛的存在
'cause you haven't been spending enough time with Jen.
这是不对的 我敢保证珍妮佛其实特别棒
And that's a shame because I bet Jen is pretty damn great...
-对 -而且血也是最甜的
- Yeah. - ...and tasty.
我又说过火了
Went off the rails.
-谁来帮帮我 -也许...
- Somebody bail me out. - Maybe...
也许乔希并不是 唯一喜欢珍妮佛·沃尔特斯的人
just maybe this Josh isn't the only guy who likes Jen Walters.
也许在座的每个人
Maybe, there's a group of guys right here
现在都非常愿意和珍妮佛在一起
who would love to spend time with Jen right now.
好吧 珍妮佛
Okay, Jen.
你相信这群人 真心认可你的全部吗
Do you believe that this group genuinely values the whole of you?
-我相信 -这就对了
- I do. - And there it is.
也许你不需要女浩克 来自我防御了
So maybe, you can stop using She-Hulk as a protective shield
你可以用珍妮佛的样子 和我们在一起
and trust us with Jen.
对
Yeah!
干得好
Great job.
不得不说 这感觉确实特别好
I gotta say that felt really good.
对...
Well...
真的感觉特别好 豪猪
Felt really good, Porcupine.
天啊
Oh, my God!
-太臭了 -是啊
- It smells like a fart. - Yeah.
-感觉真好 -天啊
- Feels really good. - Oh, man.
你不会一天到晚 都带着这个面具吧 老爹
How many hours a day do you wear that mask, Papa?
-怎么了 我脸色不好吗 -没有
- Why? Am I ashy? - No, no, no.
要不你今天先穿着衣服 等送去干洗的时候再脱
Could you just leave the suit on until we can get it dry cleaned?
好的
Okay.
还有 珍妮佛 既然乔希不在乎珍妮佛
You know, Jen. If Josh isn't spending time on Jen,
那珍妮佛也完全没必要 在他身上浪费时间
then Jen doesn't need to be spending time on Josh.
他的意思是直接把乔希给删了
Delete Josh's number is what he's saying.
-删了他 -快点
- Delete it. - Come on.
删了他
Delete it.
真的吗
Really?
删了他
Delete it. Delete it. Delete it.
删了他
Delete it. Delete it. Delete it. Delete it. Delete it.
好吧 感觉如何 你成长了
Okay. How do you feel? So much growth.
不敢相信我会这么说
I can't believe I'm gonna say this,
但是我太想去汗蒸房♥了
but I'm hurtin' for a yurtin'.
珍妮佛 我就知道 早就告诉你了
Jen! I knew it. I told you!
早就告诉你了
I told you!
我必须得说不是这样的
Have to say it's not so.
各位 我会永远记着大家的 真的
Guys, I will never forget any of you, honestly.
我们给你做了这个
Well, we made this for you.
“再见 珍妮佛 我们爱你 也爱女浩克”
Aw. "Bye, Jen. We love Jen and She-Hulk."
-没错 -“一群坏蛋”
- We do. -"The gang."
-真可爱 -说是“坏蛋” 可不是真的坏蛋
- That's nice. - Says "gang" but it's not a literal gang.
千万别让假释委员会的人误会
Just make sure you make that clear to the parole board.
好的 放心
Yeah, I will. Yeah.
-好吧 -再见
- Okay. - Bye.
-多保重 小姑娘 -看开点
- You got this. - Take it easy.
-再次抱歉砸坏了你的车 -没事的
- Sorry about the car again. - That's okay.
-你可别惹事啊 -好 你也是 亲爱的
- You stay out of trouble. - Yeah. You, too, darlin'.
珍妮佛
And Jen,
当你再想起乔希的时候 记住我们遇到的每个人