瑞克和莫蒂（2013）

Morty, be sure to pee before we go.
Morty 出门前别忘了尿尿
This adventure is gonna be a long haul,
这次冒险可是道阻且长
and I don't feel like emptying the jug.
我才不想替你倒尿壶
Jerry, will you please just let me automate this fucking task?
Jerry 你敢不敢让我把这傻♥逼♥活儿给自动化了
I didn't ask for anyone's help.
我没请任何人帮我
You two are welcome to leave.
欢迎你们二位离开
Mom told me she wanted me to stay here
妈妈让我在这盯着
to make sure you didn't die.
确保你不会死
Well, you tell your mother that I'm gonna be fine.
告诉你妈我不会有事儿
Don't train your child to lie, Jerry,
别教孩子扯谎 Jerry
even though, you know, 'tis the season.
虽说 你懂我的意思 圣诞节什么的
Then I'll tell her.
那我亲自找她说去
I told you, no more rays.
我告诉过你 别再拿射线照我了
What ray did you zap me with?
你拿什么射线照的我
I made your atomic matrix slightly lighter than air,
我刚把你的原子矩阵降到比空气略轻
and now your shoes are heavier than air,
现在你的鞋子比空气更重了
which makes you neutrally buoyant,
这让你获得整体中性的浮力
which I find personally more impressive conceptually than walking on water,
我个人觉得 概念上这比耶稣的水上行走还令人动容
but what do I know?
不过我知道个啥呢
I wasn't born into the god business.
我又不是生下来就是个神
I fucking earned it.
老子自己赚来的
Just to be clear, this doesn't mean you helped me.
得先说清楚 我可没说你帮到我了
It wears off in 10 hours,
10小时后失效
and the next hit will cost you 30 bucks.
续费请充30刀
Like I'll even be using it in 10 hours.
说的好像10小时后我还用得上它似的
Siri, set a 9-hour and 50-minute timer.
Siri 设置一个9小时50分钟的倒计时
Playing The Beatles.
即将播放披头士
I need to pee. Nope.
我要尿尿 不行
Here, I've got a centipede you can swallow
来 吞了这条蜈蚣
that makes you not have to go.
你就不想尿了
I ain't swallowing no centipede.
我才不吞蜈蚣
What, you think the centipede wants to eat your pee?
什么 你以为蜈蚣愿意替你喝尿吗
You're not the victim in this transaction.
这件事中 它才是受害者
Uh-oh, flat tire.
啊哦 爆胎了
How the hell do you get a flat tire in space, Rick?
太空中难道还能爆胎吗 Rick
Obviously from a sharp thing in space, Morty.
显然是因为碰到了太空中尖锐的东西 Morty
It's just crazy how much it feels
这和正常的爆胎
like getting a regular flat.
也太像了点儿吧
Oh, no, no, that's just my custom-programmed,
啊不 不 那是我自己定制的
fully immersive flat-tire indication experience.
深度沉浸式的爆胎反馈体验
I can turn it off. I thought it was cooler
我也可以把它关了 我觉得这
than the celebrity voice package, but here.
比明星语♥音♥包要酷一点儿 你听这个
Flat tire -- you should be...walkin'.
爆胎了 你本该 走路的
Can I come out with you, Rick? No, I've seen this movie.
我能和你一块儿出去吗 Rick 不行 电影里有这场景
Two guys leave the ship.
两个人离开船
One guy goes spinning away.
其中一个旋转着圈儿就没影了
You're staying in here where it's safe.
你待在这里安全得很
Morty, goddamn it. Come on.
Morty 该死的 别嘛
I n-- I never get to be out here.
我从 从来没到过外边
Ugh, you young people think space is like
你们这些年轻人都把太空当成
"Saturday Night Live."
《周六夜现场》吗
You see it every day, so you dream of being in it,
场场不落 连做梦都想上一场
but it dreams of removing all the air from your body
可它却想把你体内的空气抽个精光
and making you float around it for eternity
然后让你永远在这飘着
as a flash-mummified corpse,
像具瞬间木乃伊化的尸体
which is also what space wants, so get back in the car.
这就是太空的想法 所以滚回飞船里去吧
I'm not in danger. There's nothing out here.
我倒感觉没啥危险 外面啥也没有
Literally everything is out here,
实际相反 这外面什么都有
and unlike everywhere else, I'm too busy to help you.
而且这和任何地方都不一样 我太忙了没空帮你
Right, because you're always so helpful.
那可不 你可乐于助人了
God damn it. What is that?
该死 那是什么
Obviously, it's a space snake.
这很明显 是一条太空蛇
T-There's snakes in space?
太 太空里还有蛇吗
There's literally everything in space, Morty!
实际上太空里什么都有 Morty
Now get the fuck back in the car.
你♥他♥妈♥赶紧给我滚回飞船里去
I'm dying, Rick.
我要死了 Rick
I can see the black mountain.
我已经出现幻觉了
People who are really dying don't keep bring it up.
真要死的人才不会一直念叨自己快死了
Is that true? I don't know.
真的吗 我也不知道
I'm just usually around people that die faster.
只是我碰到的情况经常是没两下就死了
All right. All right.
好吧 好吧
J-Just let me analyze the snake's planet,
让 让我分♥析♥一下蛇星
so I can whip up an antivenom.
然后就能造出血清了
Computer, you might want to put a rush on this.
电脑 你可能得快点儿了
Morty's starting to look like a '90s Japanese ghost.
Morty越看越像90年代的日本鬼怪了
Cutting corners.
偷工减料模式
Oof, oh, my God, these snakes are a mess.
啊我天 这些蛇真是一团糟
19 billion snakes divided into 10,000 nations
190亿条蛇分成了一万个国家
all on the brink of global war over...
世界大战一触即发 而战争是为了
race.
种族
How funny is that?
真有意思
Imagine being a racist snake.
想象下 作为一条种族歧视蛇
"Hey, other snake, I hate you
“嘿 其他蛇 我恨你们
because you're the wrong color, snake."
因为你们颜色不对 蛇们”
Oh, my God. You're not laughing?
哦我天 你居然没笑
Oh, you're dying.
啊 你快死了
It's a miracle they were able to fling one this far out
他们在濒临灭绝之际 还能把一条蛇
before they slithered into extinction.
送上太空简直是奇迹
Oh, oh, God, I killed their --
哦我天 我杀了他们的
What's his name, their Buzz Aspirin?
怎么叫他 蛇星的巴兹·阿司匹林吗
It's actually Buzz Advil, Morty,
应该叫巴兹·布洛芬吧 Morty
and, uh, this is totally different.
还得说句 这可完全不是一回事
It's a female snake.
这是一条母蛇
There's an extra layer of heartbreak.
多了个令人心碎的原因
Wait. Wait. Morty, Morty, you hear that?
等等 等等 Morty Morty 你听到了吗
Listen.
听
Snake jazz.
蛇爵士乐
Ha. Idiots. Let's get moving.
哈 蠢货 咱们走吧
We've got a long way to go,
还有很长一段路呢
and I'm not sharing that centipede.
我可不想跟你共享蜈蚣
Rick, wait. Go back.
Rick 等等 回去
I-I can't be the reason why 19 billion snakes lost all hope.
我不能成为190亿条蛇希望破灭的元凶
That's right, Morty.
没错 Morty
Only 19 billion snakes can do that.
只有他们自己能做到这点
That species was never getting beyond this stage.
那个物种跨不过这个阶段的
To paraphrase the great Jeff Foxworthy,
用伟大的Jeff Foxworthy的话说就是
if you bite your first contact on its ankle,
“如果你在第一次接触外星人时去咬对方的脚踝
you might be a type-zero-civilization-neck."
那你顶多是个零型文明的乡巴佬”
What up, homeys?
怎么了 亲们
Shooting hoops, I see.
投篮 我懂了
Hey, who's interested in a friendly bet
嘿 谁有兴趣打个友好的赌
that this white guy can jump.
就赌这个白人会跳
Hey, leave the racial stuff off the court, okay?
喂 别把种族问题带到球场上好吗
Oh, I thought that kind of talk was part of street ball.
哦 我以为街头篮球就要包含这种对话
Well, now it's part of everything else, so chill.
现在球场外啥啥都跟种族有关 所以就别在球场上说这个了
We -- We got off on the wrong foot.
咱 咱们刚才的打开方式不太对
My name is Jerry Smith. I live in the suburbs.
我叫Jerry Smith 住在郊区
I'm only here because I have a certain power
来这儿仅仅是因为我得到了某种力量
I wanted to kind of celebrate before it goes away.
我想在它消失之前运用一下 以示祝贺
Yo, we got a Nazi up here.
哟 咱们这儿有个纳粹
Hey, I think there's a misunderstanding.
嘿 我想你们是误会了什么
Here, just -- just watch.
来 看 看好了
Help! Help!
救命 救命
I-I need that shoe!
快给我那只鞋
No, no, don't touch that shoe or that money.
不不 别碰那鞋或者钱
Let them be a powerful but confusing monument
就让它们化作强力又让人费解的丰碑
to our neighborhood's integrity.
彰显我们街区的正直
Oh, boy, what an adventure, huh?
天啊 多棒的冒险 哈
Hey, Morty, listen. I can tell you're pretty upset
嘿 Morty 听着 我看得出
about the whole snake encounter thing,
你对蛇的事儿很不高兴