公园与游憩（2009）

所以怎么样 她没问Andy醉酒的事情吧
So how'd it go? She didn't ask about Andy being drunk, did she?
哦 没 没 就是一些标准问题
Oh. No. No, just your kind of standard questions.
只有一件讨厌的事情
There was one annoying thing.
她和Mark做♥爱♥了
She and Mark had sex with each other.
开玩笑吧
You're kidding.
我希望我是 但是没有 他们做了
I wish I was, but I'm not. They did it.
Shauna Malwae-Tweep 和 Mark Brendanawicz
Shauna Malwae-Tweep and Mark Brendanawicz
昨晚和彼此做♥爱♥了
had sex with each other last night.
谁做♥爱♥了
Who had sex?
那个Mark和那个记者
That guy Mark and the reporter.
猜中了 我猜中了
Called it. I called that.
你记得吧 - 是
You remember that? - Yeah.
确实是 他完全说中了
He did, actually. He totally called that.
为什么男人都要这样啊
Why do men have to behave like this?
为什么他们不能专业一点
Why can't they be professionals?
男人都是狗
Men are dogs.
你知道 可能他们喜欢对方
You know, maybe they really like each other.
他可不喜欢她
He doesn't like her.
他可能用他鸡鸡那个头思考了
He was probably thinking with the head of his wiener
而不是脑子那个头
instead of the head of his brain.
哦 天 Andy 别这样
Oh. God. Andy, come on.
男人都这样 很恶心
Men do that. It's disgusting.
我应该找他聊聊
Well, I should go talk to him.
保证他不要说什么伤害项目的话
Make sure that he didn't say anything to hurt the project.
是的 当然 你得和他聊
Yeah. Definitely, you should talk to him.
是的 好主意 Ann
Yeah. Good idea, Ann.
我赌他没戴套
I bet he didn't use a condom.
Andy 别
Andy, God!
你好 Mark 我能进你办公室吗
Hello, Mark. May I come into your office?
我需要跟你讨论一些敏感话题
I need to speak with you about something very sensitive.
我注意到一些需要你注意的事情
Something's come to my attention that requires your attention.
我注意到你和Malwae-Tweep小姐上♥床♥了
It has come to my attention that you had sex with Ms. Malwae-Tweep.
这可是私事
That's personal.
作为人♥民♥公仆 和媒体人员上♥床♥既不道德也不负责
It's unethical and it's irresponsible for a public servant to have sex with a member of the press corps.
尤其是你还和一个这么恶心的人上♥床♥
Especially when you have sex with someone who is so skanky.
想想 和她上♥床♥...
I mean, have sex with her and...
我想说几句话 但希望你别误解
I'm gonna say something. I don't want you to take it the wrong way.
你现在就像个傻子
But you're being a huge dork.
我不允许我的子委员会成员有这种行为
Well, I can't allow that kind of behavior from someone serving on my subcommittee.
那我退出你的子委员会
Well, then I resign from your subcommittee.
Shauna Malwae-Tweep
Shauna Malwae-Tweep.
你好 我是公园与娱乐部门副主任
Hi, this is deputy director of Parks and Recreation...
Leslie吗 你好 - 是的 你好
Leslie? Hi. - Yes, hi.
我偶然吃了一个过期的玉米煎饼
I accidentally ate an old burrito.
什么
What?
我在坑里表现很奇怪
I was acting strange at the pit
原因是我吃了一个过期玉米煎饼导致食物中毒
and the reason is because I had food poisoning from an old burrito.
所以 我希望我们的采访可以重来一次
So, I was hoping we could have a do-over interview.
午饭就可以 我请客
Maybe over lunch. I'm buying.
行 我应该有空 我猜不吃墨西哥菜了
Yeah, I guess I'm free. I'm assuming not Mexican.
为什么
Why?
因为那个玉米煎饼
Because of the burrito.
哦
Oh!
啊 那个 不是个墨西哥的玉米煎饼
Yeah, well, it wasn't a Mexican burrito.
你确定这是你现在应该吃的吗
Are you sure that's the best thing for you right now?
哦 这可是菜单上最好的东西
Oh, it's the best thing on the menu.
所以 我觉得我可能
So, look, I feel like I may have
在大坑采访那天有点跑题
gone a little off message at the pit.
是的 你看起来有点奇怪
Yeah, you seemed a little weird.
我不想说奇怪
Well, I wouldn't say weird.
只是 我们想吧一个危险丑陋的东西
It's just, we're trying to turn a dangerous eyesore
改造成一个美丽的社区公园
into a beautiful community park
而一篇正面的文章能有效推动这件事的发生
and a positive article could go a long way towards making that happen.
好的
Great.
你觉得这个公园实际能建成的几率有多大
So what do you think the odds are that this park is actually gonna get made?
我能说超过100%吗 要是说少一点都是在撒谎
Can I say over 100%? Because I would be lying if I said less.
哇 你听起来比我聊过的一些人更自信呢
Wow. You seem a lot more confident than some of the other people I've spoken to.
我给你读一些他们的话吧
Can I read you some of these quotes?
请便
Be my guest.
"Sullivan大街的坑永远都会是个坑
"
"The Sullivan Street pit is always going to be a pit."
在我们建成公园之前
Well, until it turns into a park.
是的 我同意
Yes, I agree.
"嘿 你该写一篇独角兽的文章
"Hey, you should write an article on unicorns,
"因为他们比这个公园更可能存在"
"because they're more likely to exist than this park."
哦 是嘛 去哄14岁的孩子吧
Oh, really? Tell that to a 14-year-old girl.
"你应该写一篇教皇结婚的文章
"You should write an article on the Pope getting married,
"因为它比这个公园更可能发生"
"because that's more likely to happen than this park."
有些国家教皇是可以结婚的
There are some countries where the Pope can be married.
"你应该写篇关于会说话的猴子的文章"
"You should write an article on talking monkeys."
真的嘛 你看过《绿野仙踪》吗
Really? Have you seen The Wizard of Oz?
"你应该写篇关于妖精的文章"
"You should write an article about leprechauns."
妖精是存在的
Leprechauns exist.
"你应该写篇太阳从天上掉下来的文章"
"You should write an article about the sun falling out of the sky."
为什么要写那样的文章 那
Why would you write an article about that? That's...
这条就是 "不行"
This one is just "No."
"这个公园永远永远永远永远建不成"
"This park is never, ever, ever, ever going to happen."
我能问问是谁说的吗
Might I ask who said that?
Mark Brendanawicz
Mark Brendanawicz.
请进 - 嘿
Yeah. - Hey.
你好
Hi.
我能跟你聊聊吗
Can I talk to you for a second?
好 怎么
Yeah, what's up?
我们得找个办法搞定这个记者的事情
You and I need to find a way to fix this reporter thing.
为什么这成了个大事了
Why is this a big deal to anybody?
很显然 这个记者要报道你跟她讲过的所有话
Well, apparently, the reporter is gonna print everything you said to her.
但我没跟她说过什么啊
But I didn't say anything to her.
"这个公园永远永远永远永远建不成"
"The park is never, ever, ever, ever getting built?"
但那些话都是不发表的啊
But that stuff was off the record.
你说过不能发表吗
Did you say it was off the record?
必须说不能发表吗
Do you have to say it's off the record?
哦 天啊
Oh, God.
嘿 非常感谢能见我们
Hey. Thank you so much for meeting us.
没事
Sure.
嘿 Mark
Hey, Mark.
嘿
Hey.
呃
Uh...
我听说你要报道一些
I heard that you were gonna print some of that stuff
我私下里关于公园的评论
that I said in private about the park.
哦 是的 我的编辑很喜欢
Oh, yeah. My editor loves it.
我们真心恳求你不要发表这些
You know, we'd really appreciate it if you didn't print that stuff
因为我们想建成这个公园
'cause we're trying to build this park...
我不理解
I don't understand.
你确实说了吧
You did say it, right?
严格来说
Technically.
严格来说
Technically?
这个 你知道的
Well, you know,
你起来准备写文章然后我说
you got up because you had to write the article and I said,
"别啊 留在床上吧
"Come on, stay in bed.
"那个公园永远永远永远建不成的"
"That park is never, ever, ever gonna get made."
是的 然后我就回到床上了
Right. And then I came back to bed.
是的 但重要的是我说了"留在床上"
Yeah, but the important part of what I said was, "Stay in bed."
你知道 那种情况下我会说任何
You know, I would've said anything at that point
会让你留在床上的话
if I thought it would make you stay in bed.
好吧 既然我们 你知道 有浪漫关系
Okay, well, since we're, you know, romantically involved,
我不会发表那些话的
I won't print any of it.
很棒 非常感谢 - 不用谢
That's great. Thank you so much. - You're welcome.
但 我不会说是浪漫关系
You know, I wouldn't say romantically involved.
你知道 在此之后
You know, going forward.
我的天啊
Oh, my God.
怎么