一夜寻情记（2014）

Mixology S01E04

Part 2 April 26, 2021, 11:06 a.m.

太痛苦了
It's too painful.
-别放弃卡尔 -或者放弃卡尔
- Hey, don't give up, Cal. - Or do give up, Cal, okay?
显然你所做的没用
Because clearly what you're doing, it's not working.
你只是不断在结婚
You just keep marrying people.
我很意外我们坐在这里后
I'm surprised you haven't married someone
你居然还没有结婚
since we've been sitting here.
事实是我爱这些女人
The thing is, I loved every one of those women.
我的心里有感觉
Like, I felt it in my heart.
结果她们全变成完全不同的人
And they all turned out to be completely different people.
怎样我现在要忽视内心的感觉吗
So what? I'm supposed to ignore my heart now?
-不永远不要 -是的永远这样
- No! Never! - Yes, always!
显然你的心是个傻♥逼♥
Because clearly you have a stupid heart.
别再听从你的傻♥逼♥内心了卡尔
Stop listening to your stupid, stupid heart, Cal.
开始听从你的大脑和你的下半身
Start listening to your brain and your balls.
我说的大脑其实就是指你的下半身
And by your brain, I-I definitely mean your balls.
听好了哥们听从人类的下半身
Listen up, dude. Listen to the balls of mankind.
或者你可以承认你犯了几次错
Or you can just accept that you've made some mistakes
然后最后一次追随你的心
and follow your heart one last time.
或是布鲁斯说的下半身
Or Bruce's balls thing.
我说的下半身
My balls thing.
我们为什么要来野餐
Why are we having a picnic?
我觉得会很不错
I thought it'd be nice.
还行
Yeah, it's okay.
我只知道下次我再说找到了真命天女
Look, all I know is the next time I say I found the one,
我需要你们...
I need you guys to st--
给你一拳谢谢
To punch you in the neck! Thank you!
我就会这样做
That's what I'm gonna do.
我会蜷起这些橙色肌肉
I'm gonna curl up these little orange muscles here
朝你下巴下面挥过去
and right under your chin.
我们在公共场合
We're in a public place!
我只是在阻止你
I'm just trying to stop you
第四次犯同样的错误白♥痴♥
from making the same mistake for the fourth time, idiot.
拜托他没有娶那个服务员
Oh, come on, he's not marrying the waitress.
他只是和她聊天
He's just talking to her.
汤姆你没有我那样了解他
Tom, you don't know this kid like I know him.
他马上就会去家小商店买♥♥枚戒指
He's about to run off to some strip mall and grab a ring.
因为他喜欢的就会套个戒指在上面
And because he likes it, he's gonna put a ring on it.
你没看到刚才的事吗
Did you not just see what happened?
我和这个女生太来电了
I have crazy chemistry with this girl.
让我想起我认识玛雅的时候
Yeah, it reminded me of when I met Maya.
这是魔法
It was magical.
汤姆闭嘴
Tom, stop it.
我以前婚姻的问题是
The problem with my marriages
我不了解我娶的女人
was I didn't know the women I was marrying.
但这次不同了
But this is different.
我感觉已经认识凯西一辈子了
I feel like I've known Kacey my entire life.
她和她们不同
And she's not like them.
她甜美可人她乐观她风趣
She's sweet and she's positive and she's fun.
她是你的真命天女
And she's the one.
不她不是
No! She's not the one!
她只是这个酒吧的服务员
She's the waitress at the bar!
兄弟拜托看清楚一些吧
Dude, come on. See through this.
服务员只是端着食物的脱衣舞♥女♥ 就是这样
Waitresses are just strippers with food. That's all they are.
她们只想要你的钱
They're just trying to get your money.
哥们你爱脱衣舞♥女♥
Dude, you love strippers.
对但是随便啦
Yeah. That -- whatever!
不别听他的
No, don't listen to him.
服务员是为你送来东西的好人
Waitresses are nice people who bring you things.
跟随你的心
Follow your heart.
不要哥们不要好吗
No, dude. No, okay?
我会让你看到这是错的
I'll show you that this is wrong.
我会叫她过来五秒钟内
I'll call her over here, and in five seconds,
我就会和她擦出火花
I'll make this amazing connection with her
我们会私奔
and we'll go elope.
没错我会先发制人
That's right. I'll beat you to the punch.
我会抢在你之前先娶她
I'm gonna marry her before you.
好的叫她过来
Fine. Call her over.
好了
Okay.
你听到有人哭吗
Do you hear somebody crying?
-没有 -有
- No. - Yes.
-我什么也没听到 -我听到了
- I don't hear anything. - I do.
那我们快走别听了快
Then let's go. Stop it. Come on.
不能抛下一个哭泣的女生
We can't leave a crying girl.
你知道事情会怎样
You know how this works.
一旦被哭泣的女生黏上
Once you get started with a crying girl,
就永远无法脱身了
you can never get out.
就像那个蒂娜什么来着
It's like Tina what's-her-face?
拜托高三返校舞会
Come on, Junior homecoming?
对我们第二天天亮才得以脱身
Yeah. And we didn't escape till dawn the next day.
外面有人吗
I-I-I-is someone in here?
你还好吗亲爱的
Are you okay, sweetie?
不太好
Not really.
你可以打电♥话♥给什么朋友吗
Do you have any friends that you could call, maybe?
不我的朋友都差劲死了
No! No, my friends suck!
她们今晚都出去了不带我
Th-they all went out without me tonight!
也许她们甩掉你是因为你是个爱哭包
Maybe they ditched you 'cause you cry too much.
太遗憾了亲爱的
I'm so sorry, sweetie.
你要告诉我们出了什么事吗
Do you want to t-tell us what happened?
我的天你真好谢谢
Oh, my god, that's so nice. Thank you.
但我想告诉你
But I just want you to know it's, like...
这事说来话长
It's definitely a really long story.
你说什么呢
What do you mean
女生不再把内♥裤♥给男生送过去了
girls aren't sending guys their panties anymore?
有这么一回事我读过相关文章
It's like a thing. I read about it.
人们在夜店就是这么搞的
It's people doing it up in the clubs.
莉维没人在夜店这么搞
Liv, nobody's doing it up in the clubs,
没人说 "在夜店这么搞"
And nobody says, "Doing it up in the clubs."
你的信息有误
You have bad information.
我今晚已经亲了一个男生豁出去也无妨
I already kissed a guy tonight. I might as well go all in.
好吧你希望达到一个什么目的
Oh, okay. And then what do you hope to achieve?
我只想让他觉得我风趣性感
I just want him to think I'm fun and sexy,
就像安娜·肯德里克[曾参演《暮光之城》]
like Anna Kendrick, you know?
见鬼
Oh, shoot.
我穿的是普通内♥裤♥
Oh, I'm wearing my day-to-days.
我不能把普通内♥裤♥给他送过去
I can't send him my day-to-day.
拉上来都到下巴了
They, like, come up to my chin.
看起来像枕头套
They look like a pillowcase.
好了莉维听我说
Okay, Liv, I'm telling you. Listen.
我知道你五十年来没和男人调过情
I know you haven't flirted with anyone in about 50 years,
但没人这么做
but nobody does this.
-真的没有人 -我跟你说
- Like, nobody d-- - I'm telling you.
哥们有没有女生送过内♥裤♥给你
Dude, dude, have you ever had a girl give you her panties?
经常的事儿
Yeah, all the time.
问错人了
Well, not that guy.
你下面穿的是什么
So, uh, what are you rocking under there?
不用你操心
Don't worry about it.
-我打赌你的内♥裤♥超带劲 -不
- I bet you're wearing awesome panties. - No.
我打赌你穿的是来自未来的时尚黑色内♥裤♥
I bet they're, like, sleek black panties from the future.
不只是工作日内♥裤♥
No, they're just my work panties.
玛雅把你的内♥裤♥给我
Maya... give me your panties.
好了
All right.
拍张照片因为好朋友就是我这样的
Take a picture, 'cause this is what a good friend looks like.
玛雅这条内♥裤♥太漂亮了
Maya, these panties are beautiful.
中国制♥造♥ 高档货啊
What is this, made in China? That is so fancy.
别再读我内♥裤♥上的字了
Please stop reading my panties.
-我要放在哪里 -我不知道
- Okay, so, where do I stick it? Do I put... - I don't know.
祝我好运
Wish me luck.
不
No.
好吧
Okay.
注意看着
Hey, hey, watch this.