一夜寻情记（2014）

Mixology S01E01

Part 1 April 26, 2021, 11:05 a.m.

一夜寻情记第一季第一集
这是一个关于十个陌生人的故事
This is the story of 10 strangers,
一个夜晚我们所做的
one night, and all the stupid,
愚蠢丢人的荒唐事
embarrassing, ridiculous things we do...
只为寻找爱
...To find love.
汤姆与玛雅
我们的故事始于我最好的朋友汤姆
Our story starts with my best friend, Tom.
他刚刚被伤透了心
He's just had his heart broken,
他还没有准备好面对这一切
and he is so not ready for this.
我还没有准备好面对这一切
I am so not ready for this.
放轻松兄弟你会表现很好的
Oh, hey. Relax, man. Hey, you're gonna do great.
你穿这件棕色灯芯绒外套帅呆了
Look at you looking all fly in that brown corduroy jacket.
现在这里所有人都想穿着这件外套
Everybody in here wants to be wearing that jacket right now.
我觉得我快吐了
I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
拜托兄弟你远离情场多久了十年吗
Come on, dude. You've been out of the game for what, a decade?
女生已经变了她们什么都愿意睡
Girls have changed, man. They will sleep with anything.
我总是能找到女人上♥床♥
I get laid all the time,
我好恶心从头到脚都恶心
and I'm disgusting -- head to toe.
没错他很恶心
This is true. He is disgusting.
-《欲望都市》让世道变了 -没错
- "Sex and the City" changed the game, my friend. - Yep.
女生全变成米兰达了
They're all Mirandas.
不米兰达是工作狂萨曼莎才是放荡那个
No, Miranda was the workaholic. Samantha was the slutty one.
不桃乐茜才是工作狂
No, no. Dorothy was the workaholic one.
不里面根本没桃乐茜
Nope. There was no Dorothy, dude.
抱歉应该是米兰达桃乐茜瑞秋和菲比
I'm sorry. There was a Miranda, Dorothy, Rachel, and Phoebe.
-那是《老友记》的角色 -你说什么
- That's the cast of "Friends." - What are you talking about?
你只是在说那个电视里的人物
You're just naming all the people from that show.
我去叫计程车已经...
I'm just gonna get a cab. It's been --
-不别叫 -放轻松
- Oh, no, you won't. No you won't. - Hey. Hey, relax.
你需要这样做汤米别担心
You need to do this, Tommy, all right? Don't worry about it.
我们会帮你找一个温柔的好女生
We're gonna find you a nice, sweet girl.
没错我们帮你找一个温柔喝醉的好女生
Yes, let's find you a nice, sweet, drunk girl.
鞋跟都扭断的那种
You know, the kind that breaks a heel.
你需要这样的女生
That's the kind of girl that you need.
好吧
All right.
红裙子那个如何
Hey, what about red dress?
不行她可以把汤姆当杠铃举
Nope. She could bench-press Tom.
太对不起了
I'm so sorry.
妈去晚了
Mom was late,
孩子们完全发疯了
and the kids were total maniacs going down.
太棒了
Awesome.
十年来我都是这里最老的女人
I'm the oldest chick in here by a decade.
我觉得自己是海伦·米伦
Ugh, I feel like Helen Mirren.
-告诉我今晚为什么约我 -是的
- So, tell me. Why did you want to meet up tonight? - Oh, yeah, yeah.
今晚我和一个男的在这里第一次见
Okay, so I'm meeting a guy here tonight for the first time.
-好的 -他叫罗恩
- Okay. - His name is Ron.
-不错 -他太棒了
- Nice. - And he is amazing.
但我是在网上认识他的
But I did meet him online,
有1%的可能他是杀人恶魔
so there is a 1% chance he could be a serial killer.
我需要喝一杯
Oh, I need a drink.
要喝九杯
I need like nine drinks.
-找她 -打扰下 -什么事
- Oh, this is -- - Uh, excuse me? - Yes.
给我来杯和我妹妹一样的
Um, I, uh, will have whatever the hell my sister's having.
莫吉托鸡尾酒
Mojito.
我有重要的事情要告诉你
I have something really important to tell you,
但我不想你崩溃掉好吗
but I don't want you to freak out, okay?
好吧我说了
Okay, here I go.
我们结束了
We're over.
好的
Okay.
不是你是因为我
It's not you. It's me.
我是一个非常积极的人
It's just I'm a really positive person,
而你就像消极的乌云
and you're like this black cloud of negativity
下毒雨谋杀一切生物
that rains poison on everything and murders it.
好的
Okay.
而且我要寻找的是长♥期♥的关系
Plus, I'm looking for something a little more long-term,
而你年纪很大了这样行不通的
and you're, like, really old, so how would that even work?
你要坐着电动滑板车推咱们的孩子吗
Would you wheel our kids around in your electric scooter?
我才34岁
I'm 34 years old.
我知道
I know.
总之我真心希望我们还是朋友
Anyway, I really hope we can still stay friends.
当然这样很好
Yeah, sure. That'd be great.
老天太好了
Oh, my God. That's so great.
祝你这个班上得愉快
You have an amazing shift.
你也是
Yeah, you, too.
兄弟女服务员好漂亮
Dude, this waitress is hot.
有点想啃掉她的屁屁
Kind of want to eat off her butt.
那边紫色裙子如何
Ooh, hey. What about purple dress?
不行
No.
为什么不行
Why not?
因为她穿着平底鞋兄弟
Because she's wearing flats, dude.
穿平底鞋的女生从来不想找人上♥床♥
Girls who wear flats are never trying to get laid.
我跟你们说过无数遍了
I've told you guys this a thousand times --
鞋跟越高自信越低
The higher the heels, the looser she feels.
好吧看
Okay. Ooh, okay, look.
黑发黑裙
Brunette -- black dress.
-哪里 -吧台边
- Where? - At the bar.
哇兄弟
Oh, wow, dude.
她好漂亮
She's so pretty.
是很漂亮
Oh, yes, she is.
-她看起来像空姐 -好吧
- She looks like a stewardess. - Okay.
我不知道不知道
I don't know. I don't know.
我完全配不上她
She's -- she's way out of my league.
没有谁是你配不上的
Hey, no one is out of your league.
没人哥们
Nobody, man.
你是维京海盗
You are a Viking.
你强♥奸♥ 你掠夺你抢走你的一切
You rape and you pillage and you take what's yours.
什么不行
What? Don't.
显然显然不能强♥奸♥她
Okay, obviously -- obviously don't rape her.
-别强♥奸♥ -不行
- Don't rape people. - That's not --
-你们真觉得我能行吗 -是的
- You really think I can do this? - Yes! Yes!
好吧我上了我能有什么损失对吧
All right, I'm gonna do it. What do I have to lose, right?
是吗是的
Oh, yeah? Yes.
是的
Yeah.
-一口干 -对了
- Whoa! All the way in. - All right.
你得喝完才能走
You have to finish it before you --
看起来没这么多
It looked like there was so much less.
这就对了哥们
There it is, dude.
上吧这样就对了
Go get them! All right. Yeah.
上吧勇敢上吧哥们
Go get 'em. Get get it, dude.
别尝试搞笑你一点也不搞笑
Just don't try to be funny because you're not funny at all,
别说劳拉的事你会哭得像个小女生
and don't talk about Laura 'cause you'll cry like a little girl.
-懂吗兄弟 -懂了
- Okay, buddy? - Okay.
好样的白♥痴♥
Way to go, idiot.
他完全配不上她
She's way out of his league.
她才不是她就像...老天
No, she's not. She's like -- oh, God.
现在我看清楚了她太漂亮了
Now that I'm actually looking at her, she is incredibly hot.
他死定了
He's dead.
坐下
S-sit down.
坐下坐下
Sit down. Sit down.
打扰下
Excuse me.
我能请你喝杯酒吗求你了
Hey, c-can I buy you a drink...Please?
我认识你吗
Do I know you?
不不认识
Nope. No, no. No.
我是陌生人我叫汤姆
I'm a stranger. I'm Tom.
我来跟大家讲讲我哥们汤姆的事儿
Let me tell you about my boy Tom.
他于1986年出生在罗德岛波塔基特
He was born in 1986 in Pawtucket, Rhode Island.
他母亲欢天喜地
His mother was overjoyed.
他父亲不太喜欢
His father -- not so much.
汤姆六岁时他父亲离开了
Tom's father left when Tom was six.
再见爸爸
Bye, dad.
汤姆到九岁时才明白这一点