差不多得了（2020）

我们有活了
We've got something cooking.
钱足够治好你的屁♥股♥
Enough to fix your hip...
医疗账单公♥司♥
总金额 很多
再给你儿子买♥♥件衬衣
...and buy that boy of yours a shirt.
我加入
I'm in.
维特公♥司♥的装甲车
The Werther's Originals armored truck
维特糖果世界
周五会把季度焦糖收益
makes its quarterly deposit of caramel profits
存入圣塔莫尼卡第一♥码♥头银行
at the Santa Monica First Pier Bank on Friday,
但我们要在车到达银行前抢了它
but we're going to hit it before it gets there.
六九银行
选择我们是正确的
午餐时间到了 婊贝
It's lunchtime, bitch.
通行请按键
夫人 我来帮你
Hi, ma'am. Let me help you!
敢碰我 你死定了
Touch me and you're dead!
天啊 我们过不去了
Ah, Jesus, we're gonna miss our light!
不
No!
什么
What?
不 别停下吹你的痔疮坐垫
No, don't stop to blow up your hemorrhoid donut!
你真的想这么做吗
Are you sure you're up for this?
是时候拿回我们应得的了
It's time to get what we deserve.
奶奶的储藏柜
氯仿
抱歉 年轻人
Excuse me, young man,
你的脸上脏了
but you have some schmutz on your face.
-是吗 -午餐时间到 混♥蛋♥
- I-I do? - It's lunchtime, bitch.
退后
Back away!
感觉真好 对不对 就像还没过51岁
Feels good, doesn't it? Like you're not a day over 51.
我不能让你这么做 芭布
I can't let you go through with this, Barb.
一朝当警♥察♥ 永远是警♥察♥啊
I guess once a cop, always a cop, huh?
我可不是三岁孩子
Well, I wasn't born yesterday.
我生于1937年
I was born in 1937.
如果想开枪打我 你需要这些
If you want to shoot me, you're gonna need these.
我猜你就不会信任我
I figured you wouldn't trust me,
所以我叫了后援
so I called for backup.
不许动 你们被捕了
Freeze! You're under arrest!
说人话 麦克塔格特 说人话
Language, McTaggert, language!
一朝当警♥察♥ 永远是警♥察♥
Once a cop, always a cop.
那好吧
Alright then.
看来你赢了
I guess you win.
听着 我的余生都要在监狱度过了
Listen, they'll send me away for however much life I have left.
在那之前
Before that happens,
请让我再感受一下那种激♥情♥吧
let me feel the rush one more time.
你居然放她走了
You let her go?!
不 我没有
No, I didn't.
她回来时我们会抓住她的
We'll get her when she comes back in.
她不会回来了
She's not coming back.
最后的激♥情♥
Ultimate rush!
妈 我收到你的短♥信♥来接你了
Hey, Ma, got your text to pick you up.
你不是该在上水中健身操吗
Aren't you supposed to be at water aerobics?
那个课我再不去上了
I think I'm done with that class.
兰迪
Randy!
怎么了 我以为我们要往海里扔东西呢
What?! I thought we were just chuckin' stuff into the ocean.
太棒了 和好朋友一起
This is the best. Isn't it nice
在户外共度时光很棒 对不对
to spend some time outdoors with your closest friends?
人与人之间的关系到底怎么了
What ever happened to human connection?!
你们情愿崇拜你们发光的砖头
You'd rather worship your glowing bricks
也不愿和像我这样享受生活的人相处吗
than engage with a bon vivant like myself?
在公园里一起玩挺好的
It's nice to hang out in the park.
真敢说啊
Bold stance.
这个观点怎么样
How's this for a big statement?
手♥机♥毁灭了社会
Phones have ruined society.
这就是为什么我用老式手♥机♥
That's why I keep it old school.
妈妈 我害怕
Mom, I'm scared!
我只用手♥机♥做两件事
I need a phone for two things --
打电♥话♥和当计算器
making calls and using a calculator.
你能用你那个资本主义跟踪设备做的事
Anything you can do on your capitalist tracking device,
我都可以自己做
I can do by myself.
推特标签 大♥师♥杰作
Hashtag masterpiece.
下个路口 右转
Take next exit, right.
别看手♥机♥ 注意看路
Get off your phone and pay attention!
咱们开始吧
Oh, yeah, here we go.
古典黄书
咱们开始吧
Oh, yeah, here we go.
怎么这样
Oh, come on.
如果你把手♥机♥升级一下
You know, you wouldn't get paper cuts on little Alex
小♥弟♥弟♥就不会被纸划伤了
if you upgraded your phone.
那是永远不可能的
Well, that is never going to happen.
这东西结实得跟坦克一样
This thing is built like a tank.
没关系 我可以把它放大米里面除水
It's fine. I can put it in a bowl of rice!
不要
Noooooo!
电视城
等一下 他们都有计算器功能
Wait, they all have calculators?
那我要怎么选
How am I supposed to choose?
亚历克斯...
Alex...
分形
你好 亚历克斯
Hello, Alex.
我是基拉 来自分形的新型数字助理
I'm Kira, the new digital assistant from Fractal.
如果你喜欢计算器
If you like calculators,
你就会爱上我们新出的全球度量衡转换器
you'll love our new global measurement convertor.
想要克服我的怀疑主义可没那么容易
It's not going to be that easy to overcome my skepticism of --
原来一吨♥等于这么多克
Is that how many grams are in a metric ton?
亚历克斯 为了完成我的设置
Alex, in order to complete my setup,
我只需要你提供拇指指纹 DNA样本
all I need is your thumb print, DNA sample,
只需要指尖
一点点就够啦
还有你的社会保障号♥码
and your Social Security number.
社会保障号♥码
我不需要那些华而不实的功能
I don't need all the bells and whistles.
我就希望把数字加到一起就行
I just want to add numbers together --
87 22 像这种的
87, 22, you know, stuff like that.
我宁愿选择真实生活而不是手♥机♥屏幕 谢谢
I'll take real life over a screen, thank you very much.
亚历克斯
Oh, Alex.
基拉
像你这样的天才人物怎么能屈就于真实生活呢
Why should a genius like you settle for real life?
*希望来点鹰嘴豆泥十点十五分送到家门口*
*Want some hummus at 10:15 delivered to your door*
*有权访问所有人类的知识以及某个特殊类型的黄♥片♥*
*Access all man's knowledge and really specific porn*
*宝贝 基拉就是帮你做这些的*
*Baby, that's what Kira's for*
*所有的交友软件*
*OkCupid, Tinder, Grindr*
*不管哪一款是你的菜*
*Whatever floats your boat*
*亲爱的 基拉懂你的倾向 你的渴求 你的怪癖*
*Kira's got your vice, honey, your itch, your rope*
*你可以追踪你喜欢的 屏蔽其它的*
*Follow what you like and you can tune out all the rest*
*躲进滤镜的泡泡*
*Step inside the filter bubble*
*你的选择永远最佳*
*Where your take is the best*
*宝贝 基拉就是帮你做这些的*
*Baby, that's what Kira's for*
*臣服于基拉吧 把你的数据给我*
*Give in to Kira now, give your data up to me*
*把你的 数据*
*Give your! Data!*
*给我我我我我我*
*Up to me-e-e-e-e-e-e-e*
星期一
点餐
帮你嚼
星期三
分形
星期四
他一整天都没出过房♥间了
He hasn't left his room all day.
而且有股奇怪的味道
And there's a weird smell.
还不是他平常的那种怪味
And not his regular weird smell.
我们需要干涉一下 让他放下手♥机♥
We need an intervention to get him off that phone.
亚历克斯 我们认为你出了问题
Alex, we think you might have a problem.
乔什 干涉这个阶段就省了吧
Josh, we're past the intervention stage.
往后站
Stand back!
你最好别那么做 珀尔
I wouldn't do that, Pearle.
亚历克斯已经进入赛博矩阵里了
Alex is jacked into the cyber-matrix.
如果你把我杀掉 他也会被删除
If you kill me, he will also be deleted.
我打赌我可以用我的VR头套和他取得联♥系♥
I bet I can make contact with my VR headset.
我会把自己和矩阵连接 就像基努·里维斯电影那种
I'll plug in to the matrix, just like in that Keanu Reeves movie.
《疾速追杀》
Oh, "John Wick."
-不是 -《触不到的恋人》
- Nope. - "The Lake House."
也许吧 没看过那部