间谍亚契（2009）
Archer
第六季
剧集 | 间谍亚契（2009） | 导航列表
间谍亚契（2009）
Archer S06E09
Part 2
Dec. 2, 2020, 3:05 p.m.
about chopping off their hands
说着关于敢洒掉哪怕一滴汤
if they spill even a single drop,
就把双手砍掉的笑话
like we used to do in the Belgian Congo.
就像我们原来在比属刚果时那样
Hm. And how about that chandelier, huh?
你们觉得那个吊灯怎么样
But I wouldn't wanna dust it!
但我一点也不想擦那个灯
An opinion apparently shared by the staff
显然 负责其余家具的员工
about the rest the furnishings.
也是这么想的
If this were my palace, I'd--
这要是我家 我
What did I tell you, wench?
我怎么跟你说的 小贱♥人♥
Stop right there! Who are you?
别动 你是谁
I am... Butler.
我是 巴特勒[管家]
The butler.
就是管家啊
Wait, your name is Butler, or--?
等等 你是叫巴特勒还是
Both! And I've heard every joke!
都是 大家总拿我名字开玩笑
My sincere apologies, Your Majesty,
我真诚地向您道歉 王后
for the deplorable state of the house.
这房♥子的状况实在太糟了
Good help is difficult to find,
好帮手是很难找的
as I'm sure Your Majesty well knows.
王后陛下一定很清楚
What I know, you impudent toad,
无礼的小子 我知道的是
is that if a servant dared speak to me in my palace,
如果一个仆人胆敢在我的宫殿里和我说话
I would have him sewn into a burlap sack filled with rats,
我会把他塞到一个装满老鼠的麻袋里
and the sack thrown into the river.
然后把麻袋丢到河里
Burn!
蠢货
Well slapped, Your Majesty.
扇得好 王后陛下
Come! Let's get this over with
过来 我们赶紧参观完了事
so I can bathe off all this filth and grime.
好让我洗掉这一身污秽
Oh, my God, can you believe this?
天啊 你能信吗
What? What?
什么 什么
My commission is gonna be huge!
我的佣金肯定是很大一笔
Come, you foolish woman!
快过来 你这个蠢货
Coming, My Majesty!
这就来了 王后陛下
Now, is anyone allergic to ocelots?
有人对豹猫皮毛过敏吗
Oh, that's right, babou!
没错 宝贝儿
Ow, man, what a hate-slappin' bitch.
老天 真是个喜欢扇人的贱♥人♥
Yeah, I gotta have sex with her. Wait, what?
是啊 我要上她 等等 什么
But I thought you and Lana were kinda, you know...
我还以为你和拉娜有点 你懂的
Kinda, you know, what? What'd she say?
有点什么 她怎么说
Well, nothing, but See? Classic Lana!
什么都没 但 看吧 她就是这样
So what, you're gonna try to bang the queen
那又怎样 你要去睡那个王后
just to make Lana jealous?
就是想让拉娜吃醋吗
No. That'll just be icing
不是 不过她要是吃醋了
on what I assume will be an extremely moist cake... Blorp.
那倒是锦上添花了 真无聊
Because I've had sex with a baroness,
因为我曾经和男爵夫人
a marquise, a vicomtesse, the two princess sisters,
侯爵夫人 子爵夫人 两个公主
um, a duchess--
公爵夫人上过床
Your mom's dog? No.
你妈妈的狗吗 不是
The wife of a duke?
公爵的老婆吗
Yes, but I've never had sex with a queen.
是啊 但我还从来没上过王后
Yasmin would be my greatest masterpiece, Pam, my-- hang on...
雅思敏会是我床上事业的巅峰 帕姆 等等
Moaning Lisa.
蒙娜丽莎[谐音]
Dammit, I was gonna say that.
见鬼 我正准备说的
Girl With A Pearl Necklace.
戴珍珠项链的女孩
The Potato Eaters.
吃土豆的人[梵高作品]
Stop it! But wait.
别说了 等等
Why are you telling me your plan
你为什么要告诉我你这个
to not make Lana jealous?
不是为了让拉娜吃醋的计划
I dunno, I-- oh, my God, Pam,
我也不知道 天呐 帕姆
I think you might be my best friend.
你可能是我最好的朋友
You're my best friend!
你是我最好的朋友
What about Cheryl?
那谢丽尔呢
You're my second best friend!
你是我第二最好的朋友
Oh, my God... What?
天呐 怎么了
Eh, I thought by now I'd be doing a lot better
我原以为我现在会在老朋友的部门里
in the old friend department.
混得更好呢
I thought by now I'd be dead.
我还以为我现在早就死了
Well, day's not over...
今天还没结束呢
Right?
是吗
He what?
他什么
I mean-- so what?
我是说 那又怎样
Well, I just figured you'd wanna know.
我只是觉得你会想知道
No, you just figured it would make me jealous,
不 你只是觉得我会因此吃醋
but, spoiler alert,
但 我告诉你
I don't give a shit who Archer bangs.
我一点都不关心亚契上谁
Well, yeah, no, but if you did,
是啊 不 但如果你真的在乎
and you wanted to make Archer jealous...
而你又想让亚契吃醋的话
Then I'd go break my pussy off
那我就在那个性感的小王子
on that hot little prince's merguez.
身下的巨物前张♥开♥双♥腿♥躺下
Exactly, that's what I'm-- wait, what?
没错 这就是 等等 什么
Which, come to think of it,
这个 想想看
would be what my vagina refers to as a "win-win."
就是我的小妹妹所说的双赢了
But wait a minute! Love to, can't,
等等 有心无力
got a pussy to break.
我急着去张开腿呢
Well, that backfired.
这可真是事与愿违
Or did it?
是吗
Yes, yes, it most certainly did.
是啊 当然了
Okay, people, listen up.
好了 伙计们 听好了
If you're not in position,
如果你们还没有就位
you'd better get there A.S.A.P. because--
最好赶紧就位 因为...
Uh, what's that?
那是怎么了
Because right about now,
因为现在
Cheryl should be leading the Durhanis into...
谢丽尔应该正在将杜汉一家领到...
The world-renowned conservatory!
世界闻名的温室花房♥
Where Gillette should be ready with a transdermal solution
此时吉列应该手握人们所知的最强效的
of the most powerful laxative known to man.
泻药的透皮吸收溶液就位了
I-- dammit, I had something for this--
我 见鬼 我知道的
Wait, was it something about dukes?
等等 这难道是为了那些公爵吗
The Tunt conservatory is home to the world's
唐特温室花房♥是世上第二大
second largest collection of carnivorous plants,
肉食植物收藏的故乡
the shame of which drove
此事太过羞愧
the current owners' eccentric great-uncle,
导致现任主人的古怪的舅老爷
Theophilus Tunt, to commit suicide.
西奥菲勒斯·唐特自杀了
Or maybe it was just the syphilis.
也许他是因为梅毒过世呢
We may never know,
我们不得而知了
and, frankly, it's none of our b--
说实话 这样不关我们...
Bathroom? What?
卫生间 什么
I'm sorry, Your Majesty,
抱歉 王后陛下
I don't know what's wrong, but I need to--
我不知道这是怎么了 但我需要
Mother! Silence!
母亲 闭嘴
How dare you?
岂有此理
Indeed. Well slapped, His Majesty.
确实 扇得好 王后陛下
Now, if you will follow me, into the--
现在 我将带您去...
Bathroom! Please, Your Majesty! I cannot wait!
卫生间 王后 我快憋不住了
I told you idiots that wasn't the real Famous Ray's!
我早就说了那不是真的雷氏披萨
A thousand pardons. Foolish woman! Where is a bathroom?
非常抱歉 傻♥逼♥ 厕所在哪里
Where isn't a bathroom?
哪里没有厕所啊
Am I right?
是吧
All kidding aside, though, the house does have
不开玩笑了 不过这里有
22 full and 18 half-baths,
22个全套卫生间 18个简易卫生间
all boasting priceless Grueby Faience tilework,
所有卫生间内部装♥修♥水准超一流
as well as--
还有...
Cucumber water bidets!
黄瓜水坐浴盆
Now, if Your Assorted
现在请我们
Majesties and Highnesses will please follow me...
尊贵的王后和王子跟我来...
To elevator number three,
三号♥电梯
where whats-her-face should be standing by...
那个谁目前位置是...
10-4 on the 20, come back.
三号♥收到 还没见人
Stop it! She will bring the prince upstairs,
住嘴 她肯定会带王子上楼
where Archer and Lana are waiting to bring him to me--
亚契和拉娜在等着将他带给我...
What? Wait, what?
什么 你说什么
What? What's that?
什么什么 怎么回事
间谍亚契（2009）
Archer
剧集 | 间谍亚契（2009） | 导航列表