黯淡安吉拉（2021）

That's beautiful, can an we see little Max?
不 没办法
No, no.
我以为拍照的重点就是
I thought the whole point was,
你想要一张我们仨的全家福
that you wanted a picture with the three of us together.
当在家里墙上看到这张照片时
When I look at this picture on our wall,
我想回忆起一个幸福的家庭时刻
I want to remember a happy family moment.
把他转向另一面 因为假如我们看不到
So, face him the other way, 'cause if we can't see it
他就没一直在哭吗
then he's not crying all the time?
微笑
Smile.
这是麦克斯吗 真是个好孩子
Is this Max, you're a good boy.
我们来聊聊埃奇沃特吧
Let's talk about Edgewater.
为什么
Why?
你一定看到了相似之处
You must see the similarities.
我不谈这个
I don't talk about that.
也许你是时候该谈谈了
Well perhaps it's time you did.
埃奇沃特
休闲中心
安吉拉 这事之前发生过
Angela, it's happened before.
太好听了
Hey, that was lovely.
希望他们给你丰厚的报酬
I hope they're paying you well for that.
你想要什么 妈
What do you want, Mum?
我不应该像跟踪狂一样在网上找到你
I shouldn't have to find you online like some stalker.
不该来你工作的地方
I shouldn't have to come down here to your work,
但我一直给你打电♥话♥ 你都不理我
but I've called and called, and you just ignore me.
我还没见过外孙呢
I haven't even met the baby yet.
我想让他在我的教堂受洗
I'd like to have him christened in my church.
你什么时候打的电♥话♥
When did you call?
听着 我知道我犯过很多错 我都知道
Look, I know I made a lot of mistakes, I do know that
我明白你生我的气 我不怪你
and I know you're angry with me and I don't blame you,
但说到底
and at the end of the day, you know,
只剩下你和我了 好吗
there's just you and me, isn't there?
我们是彼此仅有的家人
I mean we're the only family we've got.
我有自己的家庭了
I've got my own family.
我知道 但这并不全是坏事 对吗
I know, but it wasn't all bad, was it?
我15分钟后有个预约 妈
I have an appointment in fifteen minutes, Mum.
-我必须走了 -听着
- I'm gonna have to go, so... - Look.
我病了
I've not been well
他们对我的病已无能为力
and there's nothing more they can do for me now.
我只想告诉你 仅此而已
So, I just wanted you to know, is all.
我想我们也许可以...
And I thought maybe we could...
我得走了
I have to go.
亲爱的 别走 请别走
Oh love, don't, please don't.
你今天回来挺早
It's early, no?
我妈今天来酒店了
My mum came to the hotel today.
这样
I see.
她给我打了多少次电♥话♥
How many times has she called for me?
就几次
A few.
她说过为什么吗
Did she say why?
说了
She did.
你没想过告诉我
And you didn't think to pass on the message
我妈要死了吗
that my mother's dying?
我当然想过
Of course, I did.
你怎么会这么想
How could you think that?
我考虑了很多
I thought about it a lot,
关于你 你妈
about you. About your mother,
还有你们之间发生过的一切
about everything that happened between you.
但我们说好了的 不是吗
But we agreed, did we not?
许多年前 你那时情况更好
All those years ago, that you were better off
她每次都回来要求你
and every time she came back to you demanding,
不是请求 而是要求你的原谅
not asking but demanding your forgiveness.
我知道 但是
I know, but...
你现在的口吻和她一样 只是在找借口
You sound just like her, now, just coming up with excuses.
她没有其他亲人了
She's got no one.
这是谁的错呢
And whose fault is that?
她丧失了自称你母亲的权利
She forfeited her right to call herself your mother.
她在你孩提时离开了你 安吉拉
She left you when you were a child, Angela.
当她一次又一次发现自己陷入谷底时
Then when she finds herself at rock bottom time and time again,
就会来找你寻求赦免
she comes to you seeking absolution.
这次不同
This is different.
不 亲爱的 没什么不同
No, my love, it's not.
根本没有区别
It is not at all.
她仍是我母亲
She's still my mother.
你什么也不欠她
You owe her nothing.
你累了 压力大
You're tired, stressed.
是时候辞去酒店的工作了
It's time to leave that job at the hotel.
现在你有新的责任了
You have new responsibilities now.
抱歉 请问你有打火机吗
Sorry, you don't have a lighter, do you?
我令你都不敢去想象正常生活是什么样子
I made a life you could never have imagined living normal.
你就从来没有在晚上看着自己
Do you ever just look across at yourself at night
然后想象 "当我不在你面前时 你到底是谁"
and wonder, who are you really when I am not there?
我把那本书看完了
I finished the book.
然后呢
And?
那就是一个故事 不是真的
And it's a story and it's not real
我知道因为我是在看书
and I know that because I'm reading it in a book.
很明显
That's obvious.
我人生中的不同 我知道的
The difference in my life, I-kn... I know, right?
我知道我看到的是真实的
I know what I'm seeing is real,
但你说我看到的不真实
except you're saying that I don't.
当人压力大的时候
Well, when we're under a lot of stress,
当我们经受了不该经受的压力时
when we're pushed in ways we aren't used to,
有时太难以承受了
sometimes it's too much.
所以我一觉醒来
So, I just woke up
幻想我自己在和一个叫艾德的人说话
and imagined I was talking to some guy called Ed
就因为我看了一本书吗
because I read a book.
你是这意思吗
That's what you're saying?
精神错乱只是一个涵盖性术语
Look, psychosis is just an umbrella term,
涵盖所有的症状
it describes all kinds of conditions,
但从本质上来说 在这类崩溃中
but essentially, during a breakdown like this,
就像是你的大脑经历的压力过载
it's like your brain is experiencing stress overload
虽然看似是突然才出现的
and while it seems to come out of the blue,
但早前已经有过预警信♥号♥♥
there are early warning signs,
厌食 失眠
Loss of appetite. Inability to sleep--
如果你说的是真的话
If what you are saying is right, then,
我只是不知道
I just don't know...
那我要怎么相信我看到的事呢
then how am I supposed to trust what I see?
我是说比如你 你真的在这里吗
I mean, like you? Are you here?
或是这里空无一人
Or is just nothing?
看来你的问题都集中在你丈夫身上
It seems the focus of your issues is your husband.
你之前说过他控制欲很强
You've said before he's controlling.
我们可以聊聊这个
We can talk about that.
所以我们只是谈话
So, we talk and talk
但是在法官同意之前
but I'm still not allowed to see my own children
我还是不能见我的孩子们
until a judge says I can.
安吉拉 你会好起来的
Angela, you will get better.
但就算在你离开这里的时候
But even when you leave here,
我们会帮你找到新生活
we're looking to find a new normal for you,
在经历了埃奇沃特 还有这些事
with Edgewater and this--
你说过有药物治疗
You said there is medication.
你准备好了吗
You're ready?
无论你觉得我需要什么 我都吃
Whatever you think I need, I'll take it.
我要好起来
I need to be better.
但是没用快速的治疗方案
Okay, but this isn't a quick fix,
我们还是要聊聊埃奇沃特的事
we still need to talk about Edgewater.
你好
Hello?
亲爱的 是我
Love, it's me,
我在酒店吧台问到了你的号♥码
I got your number from the bar at the hotel,
希望你不介意 我只是想知道你是否有时间
I hope that's okay, I just wondered if you had time--
不 妈 现在不方便
No, Mum, now's not a good time.
什么时候方便
When is?
拜托
Please--
我不知道 现在不行 对不起
I don't know, not now, okay, I am sorry.
安吉拉