新邻里联防（2012）

否则我就回来把你们每个人都杀了
Or I will come back here and I will kill each and every one of you.
除了刚刚跟我聊天的两个辣妹以外
Except for those two hot girls I was talking to.
她们有我的资料
They have my information,
请叫她们跟我联络
please have them get in contact with me.
她们人看起来很好
They seemed great.
我很高兴你今晚来了 对不起
I'm glad you showed up tonight. I'm sorry.
没关系
It's okay,honey.
我们回家吧 好
Come on,let's go home. Okay.
宝贝 我没事
I'm okay,honey.
我想你擦干净了 放到一边吧
I think you got it all. You can put it away.
你还好吗?
You doing all right? Mmm-hmm.
鲍伯 我能跟你说个话吗?
Bob,can I talk to you for a second?
当然行
Yeah,sure.
好 我马上回来 我很爱你
Okay,I'll be in in a second. I love you so much.
我也爱你
I love you,too.
谢谢你过来
I appreciate you showing up.
我知道大器的人才会道歉
I know it takes a big man to apologize.
在保罗家发生的事并不酷
What happened back there was not cool.
你擅离职守
You abandoned your post.
如果那是外星人的巢穴
If that had been an alien hive,
我们就没命了
we would have been killed.
所以那不是巢穴 贾马克斯呢?
So,it wasn't a hive. Where's Jamarcus?
贾马克斯决定留在保罗家
Jamarcus decided to stay at Paul's.
对 那不是巢穴
And no,it wasn't a hive.
只是邻居在开性♥爱♥趴
It turned out to be a local orgy.
啥米? 这里正在开性♥爱♥趴?
What? There's an orgy happening,locally?
所以你在气我从性♥爱♥趴跑掉吗?
So,you're mad at me for leaving an orgy?
那是什么趴不重要
It doesn't matter what it was.
重点是你把我们丢下
The point is,you left us hanging.
这是原则问题
It's the principle.
不 原则是我去帮女儿解决问题
No,the principle is I went to go help my daughter who was in trouble.
伊凡 你不能这么爱控制人
Evan,you can't be such a control freak.
你太紧绷了
You're too uptight.
对 鲍伯 我很紧绷
Yeah,Bob,I'm uptight.
外星人杀邻居让我紧绷
I'm uptight about the aliens that are killing people in our neighborhood.
这是让我紧绷的地方
That's what I'm uptight about.
好邻巡逻队的人
Neighborhood Watch isn't for people
不能搞不定女儿个人的鸟事
who can't handle their daughter's personal shit.
你有听到你自己的口气吗?
Did you even hear how you sound right now?
伊凡 你怎么不看看你自己的生活...
Why don't you look at your own personal life,Evan...
因为你连个人的生活都没有
because you don't even have one.
你跟老婆不说话 你没朋友
You don't talk to your wife. You don't have any friends.
我有朋友 你没有
I have friends. No,you don't,man.
我有一堆朋友
I have tons of friends.
你没有 你只有俱乐部
No,you don't. You have clubs.
你成立俱乐部 然后拚命指挥人
You start these clubs, and you become a dictator.
你对每个人颐指气使...
You just boss everyone and you tell them what to do...
因为你在逃避真正重要的事情
because you're running away from what really matters.
你没种面对你家里的事
You don't have the guts to deal with what's going on in your own home.
我有种做这件事
I have the guts to do this.
你被除名了
You're out of the Watch.
你不能赶我走
You can't throw me out of the Watch.
我刚刚就做了
I just did.
好 无所谓 我自己成立一个
Okay,I don't care. I'm going to start my own watch.
不行 因为已经有一个了
You can't,because there already is a watch.
所以你不能这么做
So you can't do that.
我可以成立自己的好邻巡逻队
Oh,yes,I can start my watch...
因为如果我不在你的队上
because if I'm not in your watch,
你就不能管我了
you can't give me rules any more.
我还要留着我的图案
I'm going to keep my own logo,too.
反正我没喜欢过那个图案
I never liked that logo,anyway.
我的图案很屌♥! 我的图案是中国风
My logo is awesome! My logo is Chinese.
中国人了解运动...
The Chinese understand movement...
而我了解中国人
and I understand the Chinese.
我把翅膀 火焰跟老虎结合在一起
I combined flight with flames,with a tiger.
伊凡 我结合的是啥?
What am I combining,Evan?
沉着 乐观 凶猛
Serenity,optimism,attack.
法兰克林 来吃点布丁吧
Franklin,let's get some pudding inside you.
法兰克林 你不准进去
Franklin,you do not go in that house.
老天 伊凡 他不是你的
Jesus,Evan,you don't own him.
我们没人归你管
You don't own all of us.
法兰克林有自己的主见
Franklin is his own man.
他可以自己做决定
He can make his own decisions.
他可以自己打算
He can think for himself.
法兰克林 你♥他♥妈♥给我进屋来!
Franklin,get your fucking ass in the house!
不准你跟法兰克林说话!
Don't you speak with Franklin!
法兰克林 你留下来!
Franklin,you stay!
法兰克林 不要动!
Franklin,stay!
来! 法兰克林 来
Come! Franklin,come.
过来
Come here.
法兰克 过来 法兰克林
Frank. Come here,Franklin.
过来 法兰克林 看着我
Come here,Franklin. Franklin,look at me.
法兰克林 快点
Franklin,come on.
伊凡 你是我的麻吉...
Evan,you're a special friend...
可是我住在这里
But I live here.
伊凡 待在一人俱乐部是啥滋味?
How does it feel,Evan, to be in a club of one?
说不定他太常打手♥枪♥了
Maybe he's jacking off too much.
等到你回家井水都枯了
Like,the well is dry by the time you get home.
够了
Ew. Stop.
你在他的阴♥茎♥上有看到擦伤
Have you noticed any abrasions
或受到压♥迫♥的痕迹吗?
or signs of stress on his penis?
擦伤? 没有
Abrasions? No.
比方说 他打得太用力了?
Like,he's pulling on it too hard?
我不孕
I'm sterile.
掰
Bye-bye.
卡拉
Hey,Carla. Hey.
老婆 我不能生
Honey,I can't have kids.
我去找医生检查过了
I went to a doctor and got it checked out.
我生不出来
And I am barren.
是我的关系 不是你
It's me,it's not you.
不是我们两个的关系 是我
It's not the both of us, it's me.
我一直想告诉你
And I've been trying to tell you,
只是每次你想做的时候...
but just every time you wanted to have sex...
我满脑子只有这件事
it was all I could think about.
我不知道该怎么告诉你...
And I didn't know how to tell you,so...
你为什么不告诉我?
Why wouldn't you tell me?
这不是夫妻该一起解决的事吗?
Isn't that the kind of thing that couples figure out together?
我知道你有多想生小孩...
I just knew how much that you wanted this...
我不想让你失望
and I didn't want to let you down.
对 可是我要我们的婚姻
Yeah,but I want this.
这比什么都重要
More than anything.
我不知道 我们可以一起解决问题
I don't know,we can figure all that other stuff out.
我只希望我们能一起努力
All I ever wanted was for us to be a team.
我也只想要这样
That's all I ever wanted.
你我不要再有秘密了 好吗?
No more secrets,okay?
其实...
Actually...
还有一个秘密
There is one more secret.
好
Okay.
伊凡
Hey,Evan.
贾马克斯 我现在不方便
Jamarcus, now is not a good time.
我得告诉你一件事
Well,I need to tell you something.
我知道 但我现在得陪老婆
I know,I just need to be with my wife right now.
这件事更重要
This is more important.
不管是什么事都不重要
Whatever it is, it isn't.
相信我 好邻巡逻队现在得集♥合♥
Trust me,we need to get the Neighborhood Watch together now.
你要再吃一个吗? 这样会饱吗?
Do you want another one? Is that going to hold you over?
如果你还有 我就再吃
I'll eat more pudding if you have more.
我不知道我准备好接受道歉没有
I don't know that I'm open to an apology yet.
真的假的?
Are you serious?
贾马克斯 怎么了?
Jamarcus, what is going on?