太坏了

你能帮我们买♥♥酒吗
Can you get us booze?
可以 没问题
Yeah. I can. I can get you guys alcohol.
-真的吗 -一定
-Really? Seriously? -Yes, for sure.
太帅了 谢谢你
That would be awesome. Thank you.
我们正为这个担心呢 太好了
Because we were worried about that. That would be great.
而且 互帮互助嘛
Plus, you know, you scratch our backs, we'll scratch yours.
好吧 朱尔丝我想要你帮的忙
well, Jules, the funny thing about my back...
在我的小♥弟♥弟♥上
...is that it's located on my cock.
你确定你们要酒
So you do want alcohol? You want some or no?
你真的想要买♥♥酒
You do or you don't? You do want alcohol.
我都可以
Either way.
我都可以
Either way. Either way's fine.
你帮了大忙了
This is actually kind of a big favor.
我父母给了我100块让我买♥♥吃的
Because my parents left me like 100 bucks to feed myself for the week.
但是屋子里有的是吃的 所以我想都花在
But the house is full of food, so I just thought I'd spend it all...
派对的特饮上面
...on, you know, extra drinks for the party, so... .
太好了 我从来没干过这么好的事情
That's really nice. I don't think I've ever done anything that nice.
-没问题 -没问题
-It's cool? -Yeah.
-多谢 -太帅了
-Okay. Thank you. -Awesome.
真的非常感谢
I mean, seriously, that's really...That's nice of you. Thank you.
我该买♥♥不同种类的酒吗
So should I just get a shitload of different shit?
你帮我买♥♥一些凯尔杀手柠檬水好了
well, you gotta get me some Kyle's Killer Lemonade.
凯尔杀手柠檬水 听上去像基佬喝的 但是我会买♥♥的
Kyle's Killer Lemonade. That's kind of gay, but I can get it for you.
好 晚上见
So...Okay, so then we will see you tonight.
伙计们 抢球
Go to the ball, guys.
埃文 好好踢球
Evan. Get into the game.
把球踢过来
Kick it over to me.
塞思 别进球场
Seth! Get off the field!
快出去 他们会让我跑圈的
Get out of here. They're gonna make me run laps.
你听着就好
Just fucking listen, okay?
朱尔丝和她的傻瓜朋友叫我去买♥♥酒
Jules and her stupid fucking friend asked me to buy her alcohol.
但不光是帮她买♥♥ 是帮整个派对买♥♥
But not just her, for her whole party.
你知道这个意味着什么吗
You know what that means?
由于发生了奇迹 我们搭档了 所以她心里有了我
By some miracle, we were paired up and she actually thought of me.
而且她觉得可以信任我
Thought of me enough to decide I was the guy she would trust...
让我帮她搞好这个派对 她想和我做♥爱♥
...with the whole fun-ness of her party. She wants to fuck me.
她想让我的鸡♥巴♥在她嘴里进出
She wants my dick in or around her mouth.
她会不会只是利用你去买♥♥酒
Did you think that maybe she's using you to get her alcohol?
-她不想和你上♥床♥ -我当然想过
-She doesn't want your dick. -Of course I thought of that.
这是我第一时间想到的 听着
The first thing that came to my mind. Listen.
我哥哥 就是那个最顽皮的
My older brother always says the nastiest shit.
直到我12岁时都管我叫 处♥女♥膜
Like he called me "hymen" until I was 12.
塞思我想帮你口♥交♥
Seth, I wanna blow you.
她肯定没有那么说
She didn't say that. Come on.
第二部分她是没说 但是第一部分
She didn't say the second part, the first...
她有一个哥哥 她可能问过他
She's got an older brother. She could have asked him.
她看着我的眼睛说
She looked me in the eyes and said:
塞思 妈妈在做少年色拉
"Seth, Mom is making a pubie salad.
我要一点你身上的"色拉油"
I need some Seth's Own dressing."
她现在很欠操 很欠操 老兄
She's D.T.F. She's down to fuck, man.
她要的就是肉♥棒♥插穴
P in vagi. She wants to fuck, man.
今晚真的有机会上她
Tonight is the night that fucking is an actual possibility.
你说话像白♥痴♥一样 你不会睡到她的
You sound like an idiot. You're not gonna sleep with her.
不 哥们 我知道自己在胡说八道
No. Dude, I know I talk a lot of shit, okay?
可是她今晚要参加聚会 还会喝醉
But she's gonna be at the party and she's gonna be drunk.
她至少有一点点喜欢我 那么我最起码可以摸摸她
She likes me at least a little. At the very least, I'll make out with her.
两个星期打手♥枪♥ 一个月吹♥箫♥ 随便怎样吧
Two weeks, handjob. Month, blowjob. whatever.
然后她就成了我的女朋友
And then I make her my girlfriend.
然后我就能做♥爱♥整整两个月
And I've got, like, two solid months of sex.
等到大学开学的时候
By the time college rolls around...
我就是黄夏留教授了
...l'll be like the Iron Chef of pounding vag.
我们以后再谈这个好吗
Can we talk about this later?
搞什么 埃文 我们丢了两个球了
what the fuck, Evan? we're down two points.
别激动 格雷格 这是足球
Fucking calm down, Greg. It's soccer.
-这是足球 -操♥你♥妈♥
-It's soccer. -Fuck you, man.
格雷格 你怎么不再尿裤子了
Hey, Greg, why don't you go piss your pants again?
-八年前就不尿了 浑蛋 -大家不会忘记的
-That was eight years ago, asshole. -People don't forget.
你想听听最精彩的部分吗 贝卡
Do you wanna hear the best part? Becca.
你可以和她做一样的事
You do the same thing with her.
等你们喝醉了 你就可以上她
when you guys are shitfaced, you get with her.
这是我们高中时代最后的聚会
This is our last party as high school people.
我一想到这个计划 就把我对贝卡的仇恨抛弃了
I've ignored my hatred for Becca in coming up with this plan.
我可是能屈能伸的 你只要和我♥干♥了这一票
I'm flexing nuts. Just fucking come with me on this voyage...
而且做一次男子汉
...and stop being a pussy for once...
我们就能上几个妞
...and we can fucking fuck some girls already.
-我应该给贝卡买♥♥酒 -对 这等于是春♥药♥
-I should buy Becca alcohol? -Yeah, it'll be pimp.
你知道她会喝醉的 你知道女孩子什么时候会说
That way you know she'll be drunk. You know when girls say:
我昨天晚上喝得太多了 不该和那家伙上♥床♥的
"I was so shitfaced last night. I shouldn't have fucked that guy."
我们可以成为那个家伙
we could be that mistake!
你跟佛格尔说了没有
Have you talked to Fogell?
好吧 你去和贝卡说 我去和那个弱智佛格尔说
All right, you talk to Becca. I'll talk to that retard, Fogell.
别担心
Don't worry.
-塞思 离开球场 -进了
-Seth, get off the field! -Goal.
-你去捡回来 -我不捡
-You're getting that! -No, I'm not!
贝卡 等等
Hey, Becca. Hey, hold up.
-你好 -你好
-Oh, hey. -Hey.
你听说了今晚的聚会吗
Hi. Did you hear about the party tonight?
是 我刚听说了 看来会不错
Yeah. Yeah, I just heard. It sounds awesome.
是 我会去的
Yeah. Yeah, I'm going.
-是吗 -是 我要去的
-Really? -Yeah, I'm gonna go.
我就是来找你说这件事
That's why I came looking for you.
我会和朋友们去商店买♥♥点酒
Me and the guys are gonna go to a liquor store.
我在想
And I just thought, you know...
如果你也需要酒 我可以帮你买♥♥
...if you needed someone to get you yours, I could do that.
我可以买♥♥的
I could be that person.
好
Yeah.
好 那太好了
Yeah, no, that would be great.
这可帮我的大忙了 不然我就只能求姐姐帮我买♥♥了
That would save me such a hassle, because I was gonna beg my sister.
可以帮我带一瓶金箔伏特加吗
Could you get me, like, a bottle of Goldslick Vodka?
好 是那种有金色薄片飘在里面的酒吗
Yeah. That's the one with the little golden flakes in it?
-是 淑女专用的 -美酒
-Yeah. The girly one. -That's classy.
派对时我会把钱还你
well, I'll pay you back at the party.
不用了 算我的了 美女
No, you won't. No, it's my treat, miss.
-真的 -当然
-Really? -Yep. That's that.
以后还会买♥♥给你 所以习惯就好了 美女
It's the first of many too, so get used to it, sister.
谢谢
well, thank you.
没事
Yeah, no problem.
-对不起 不是故意的 -没关系
-I'm sorry. It was an accident. -It's okay.
我只是想轻轻拍你下 朋友之间的那种
I was gonna give you a nudge...A punch, the friend thing.
我不是想
I didn't mean...
-你好 贝卡 -你好
-Hey, Becca. -Hey.
-你好 -宝贝
-Hey. -Gaby.
-怎么样 埃文 -你好 盖比
-what's up, Evan? -Hey, Gaby.
-我们该去上课了 -我们得走了
-we should get to class. -we're gonna go.
-那么晚上见 -好
-So I will see you tonight. -Okay.
-真的 没关系 -好的 对不起
-Really, don't worry. -Okay. Sorry.
-再见 -对不起
-Bye. -Sorry.
再见
Bye.
对不起
Sorry.
佛格尔那饭桶去哪了 他说他来的
where's that sack of shit, Fogell? He said he'd be here.
害我在这里傻等半天
I'm here with my thumb up my ass.
我成功了 老兄 我还答应帮她付钱
I did it, dude. I even offered to pay for it.
我觉得自己象个拉皮条的
It was pimp. I feel like a pimp right now.
-就象那些拉皮条的 -其实就是他妈拉皮条
-Like one of those pimps. -That is fucking pimp.
-我就害怕这个 -我怎么没想到 狗屎
-That's what I was afraid of. -why didn't I think of that? Shit.
完蛋了
Sh...we're screwed.
-好了 我们完了 -好了
-Okay? we're screwed. -Okay.
这就是我们相信佛格尔的下场
This is what we get for trusting Fogell, okay?
他肯定是缩卵了 我知道他会缩
He pussied out. I know he pussied out.
你在做什么
what are you making?