谋杀疑云

但我又不是警探
but... I'm no detective.
对了 大伙儿
Hey! You know what, guys?
来为我们的朋友尼克和奥黛丽干杯吧
Let's toast to my friends, Nick and Audrey.
15年的美满婚姻
Fifteen wonderful years.
确实如此
Absolutely.
15年啊 敬真爱一杯
Fifteen. Here's to true love, guys.
15年快乐
Fifteen.
真爱啊
True love. Yeah.
谋杀疑云
晚餐好贵 不过也是预料之中
Dinner was insane, but that's expected.
告诉你哦
But I'll tell you what,
我想把霍莉嚼冰块的声音录下来
I want to record Holly chewing her ice cubes,
设置成起床闹钟
use it as my alarm in the morning. That's...
保证我早上立马起床出门
Guarantee me of wanting to wake up and leave.
怎么了 你不喜欢这个笑话吗
What's the matter? You didn't like that joke?
我在剔牙呢
I'm flossing.
我看见了
I can see that.
你今晚剔得有点用力过度
You're doing it extra hard tonight.
今晚睡觉不准开电扇 我讨厌那声音
And I'm not sleeping with the fan on tonight. I hate that sound.
不开电扇 我们开空调 亲爱的
No fan necessary. We'll crank the AC, babe.
糟了 我又做错什么了
Uh-oh. What, what, what?
你要吼我了吗 我都看出来了 等下
You're gonna yell at me? I can see this. Hang on.
要不要再剔会牙消消气啊
Why don't you do some more angry flossing?
为什么我们还没去欧洲 尼克
How come we haven't gone to Europe, Nick?
你得给我好好解释清楚
You have to explain this to me.
我们从没出去旅游过
We never go anywhere.
我们旅游过 那次去了波科诺山
We travel. I took you to the Poconos that time.
什么 波科 那是
What? The Poco... That was...
我们去那是为了参加葬礼 尼克
That was for a funeral, Nick.
还有那次 我们去了弗吉尼亚
How about, uh, when we went to Virginia
我叔叔在疗养院 我们见了他最后一面
when my uncle was in a hospice and we got to see him die?
-那也算是出去过 -拜托 尼克
- We did that. - Ugh, Nick. Come on.
我说的是你在那张明信片上写过的事
I'm talking about the postcard.
你忘了吗
You don't remember that?
我记得 我当然记得
I remember it. Of course I remember it.
15年了 尼克 我们还在等什么
It's been 15 years, Nick. I don't know what we're waitin' for.
你又这样了 奥黛丽
Now you've gone and done it, Audrey.
怎么 我怎么了
What? What'd I do?
我晚餐时都说了 给你准备了份大礼
I told you I had something big for you at dinner,
你就不能等到明天早上吗
and you couldn't wait till tomorrow morning?
我等不了了
No.
我们终于要去欧洲了 周年快乐
We're finally going to Europe. Happy anniversary.
天啊 我都起鸡皮疙瘩了
Oh, my God. I have chills.
天啊 天啊
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
天啊 我简直是
Oh, my God! I'm so...
我搞砸了你的惊喜
I ruined your surprise!
你什么都没搞砸
Shh. You didn't ruin anything.
你这么好 这是你应得的 我爱你
You're the greatest. You deserve it. I love you.
-我爱你 -我发誓 惊喜还在后面
- I love you! - It's still a surprise. I swear.
我们付得起吗 全部这些
We can afford it, right? This is all...
我们当然付得起了
We can afford it, of course.
我今年就要加薪了
Okay. I'm getting my raise this year.
没问题的 打起精神
Right. We're all set. Come on.
-你好 -你好 -你好
- Hello. Hi. - Hello. - How are you?
我们要去度蜜月
So, uh, we are on our honeymoon,
我能不能用这些里程
and I was wondering if we could possibly get an upgrade
兑换升舱 也许
because I have miles. Maybe...
不知道是不是你们航♥空♥的 这会过期吗
I don't even know if it's from this airline, but do they expire, or...
先生 升舱需要提前预约
Sir, you would have needed to request that in advance.
-好吧 -请这边走
- Yeah. - Right this way, please.
谢谢 抱歉耽误了你的时间
Thank you. I'm so sorry.
我们试过提前预约 我打了电♥话♥
We did try advance. I tried calling.
-那个 没人接 -你给谁打的
- And, um, nobody... - Who'd you call?
-一直不停占线 -真的假的
- Crazy busy signals. - Really?
-一直占线 -你到底打了什么电♥话♥
- It's the busy signals! - Who did you try to call?
《凶杀回函》
虽然我不想剧透 但凶手是管家
I don't want to give it away. It was the butler.
是管家干的
The butler did it.
凶手永远都不会是管家
It's never the butler who did it.
我觉得根本就没有管家这种工作
I don't even think there are butlers.
都是你痴迷的这些蠢书里编出来的
That's just a word created for those goofy books you're addicted to.
请你安静一会儿行吗
Would you just please, please shh?
让我安安静静看会儿书
Leave my books alone, okay? Just let me read.
我只是想 看书使我快乐
I just like... Makes me happy.
你没事吧 你有点暴躁
Are you okay? You're cranky.
是因为无聊吗
Are you bored?
-我要睡觉了 -睡一会吧
- I'm gonna go to sleep. - Take a nap.
-这总可以吧 -等等 不要
- Are you okay with that? - Wait, don't...
别 不要整个躺平下去
But just, please, don't... don't lay all the way back.
-不要躺平吗 -不要
- Don't take it back? - No.
干嘛 你不想我的双下巴露出来吗
Why? You don't want my double chin to show?
与你的下巴无关 这样不礼貌
It's not your chins, okay. It's just rude.
好吧
Yes.
-因为如果你躺下来的话 -好吧
- Okay. 'Cause you splay out. - All right.
你的座位就会压到后面那个人的大腿
And then your seat is in, like, the lap of the guy behind you.
多为别人着想
So just be considerate of everybody.
那我坐着吧 谢谢
I'll stay up. Thank you.
倒咯
Timber.
打扰一下
Oh, excuse me.
-嗨 -你好
- Hi. - Hello.
请问能给我一副耳塞吗
Could I please have some earplugs?
好的
Yes.
九美元一副
For nine dollars.
一副耳塞要九美元吗
Nine dollars? For earplugs?
对
Yes.
打扰了 那我就
That's okay. I'll just...
用我的花生塞一下吧
I'll just use my peanuts.
我就
I'll just...
同为失眠中人啊
A fellow insomniac, I see.
老天
Jesus.
对 我…
Yes. I...
是的 是啊 不是吗
Yep. I know, right?
我在飞机上就是睡不着
I just cannot sleep on these things.
你为什么越洋来欧洲呢
So what brings you across the pond?
其实这是我的蜜月之旅
Actually, it's my... it's my honeymoon.
恭喜你了
Oh. Congratulations.
-谢谢 -你丈夫呢
- Thank you. - Where's your husband?
死了
Dead.
睡死了 他睡死了
Asleep. He's dead... dead asleep.
我们已经结婚15年了
We've actually been married for 15 years,
但我们一直非常非常非常忙
but we just have been very, very, very, very busy.
那么为你忙碌的生活干一杯吧
Then a toast to the whirlwind that is your life.
好吧
Yes.
-对不起 女士 -怎么了
- Sorry, ma'am. - Oh, yes!
酒吧只供头等舱乘客使用
The bar is for first class passengers only.
当然 当然 很抱歉
Of course. Of course it is. I'm so sorry, yes.
我现在就回下等舱去
I will head back to the lower class cabin
坐在我应该坐的地方
and sit where I should and, uh...
再铲点煤
shovel some coal.
她是我的客人
She's my guest.
抱歉 先生 她需要自己的头等舱机票
Unfortunately, sir, she'd need her own first class ticket.
我是查尔斯·卡文迪什
Charles Cavendish.
对不起 先生
I'm so sorry, sir.
查尔斯·卡文迪什吗
Charles Cavendish?
那是你的真名吗
Is that your real name?
恐怕是的
I'm afraid so.
我的意思是 这名字就像是
I mean, that sounds like it just fell right out of a...
从悬疑侦探小说里来的
mystery novel.
那我会是什么角色呢
And which character would I be?
这种名字肯定是反派
Name like that, you'd have to be the bad guy.
好吧
Well...