他其实没那么喜欢你（2009）

Not a black shirt. I see it. It's not black.
这件是黑色的
This shit is black.
如果一个男人给了你他的号♥码 而不是拿走你的 那他就是对你不感兴趣
If a guy gives you his phone number instead of taking yours, he's not interested.
他先拿了我的 然后他给了...
He took mine first. Then he gave...
同样的 如果一个人想见你 相信我 他会来见你
And also, if a guy wants to see you, believe me, he will see you.
我曾经打给55个Lauren Bells 直到我找到我想要的那个人
I once called 55 Lauren Bells until I got the right one.
真可爱
That's cute.
然后呢?
What happened?
呃 结果 在白天 她的屁♥股♥看起来实在太大
Oh, yeah, as it turns out, her ass looked really huge in the daylight.
是否因为你的敏感 使你在女人堆里很受欢迎?
Is it your sensitivity that makes you so popular with women?
别打给他 他不喜欢你
Don't call him. He doesn't like you.
别这样小心翼翼照顾我的感受
Don't tiptoe around my feelings.
我只是想帮你 我知道 谢谢
Well, I'm just trying to help. I know. Thank you.
没事
Sure.
我要回去工作了 不过祝你好运
I gotta get back to work, but good luck.
好 再见
Okay, bye.
嘿 伙计 你在家?
Hey, buddy, you home?
是啊 快进来
Yeah. Come on in.
嘿 想喝啤酒吗?
Hey, you want a beer?
或者苹果鸡尾酒? (典型的同志饮料)
Or an apple martini?
哈 真风趣
Oh, that's funny.
你向父母坦白交待没?
Have you told your parents?
这是为了工作 我想扩大我的客户群
It's for work. I'm trying to expand my client base.
通过假扮同志?
By pretending to be gay?
不 只是变得更加"同志友好型"
No, by being more gay-friendly.
或者 用房♥地♥产♥术语来讲 就是"有同志邻居"
Or, in real estate terms, "gay-adjacent."
很好 我以后就用这个词儿
Nice. I'm gonna use that.
我应该换一换 或许这有点太过了
I should change this. It's maybe a little much.
我不知道 穿成那样 去找那个不愿意和你睡的女生...
I don't know. Dressing like that, seeing a girl who won't sleep with you...
我想你就能得逞了
...I think you can pull it off.
不是她不跟我睡 蠢货
It's not that she won't sleep with me, douche bag.
我已经跟她睡过了只是她 你知道...
I have slept with her. It's just she, you know...
再也不跟你睡了
Won't sleep with you anymore.
差不多
Pretty much, yeah.
你觉得怎么样?
What do you think?
我发现你有个难题...
I think you got a problem...
你得用棍子把他们赶跑 你这个无以伦比的...性感男人
...because you're gonna have to beat them away with a stick, you gorgeous, sexy man.
他妈的
Holy shit.
注意你的呼吸
Observe your breath.
吸气 腹部向外突出
Inhale, belly rise.
呼气 腹部向内收紧
And exhale, belly fall.
将手合拢放于胸前
Bring your hands together in front of your chest.
怀着感激之心低头
Bow your head in gratitude.
合十礼 合十礼
Namaste. Namaste.
谢谢前来 下周见
Thank you for coming. See you next week.
很棒的一课
Great class.
我们恰好遇到了
We ran into each other.
是你来上我的课
You came to my class.
我不知道这是你的课
I had no idea this was your class.
你打电♥话♥问我这是不是我的课
You called to ask me if this was my class.
不 你可没再打过来
No, you never called back.
因为你说如果是我的课我就不打给你 而它是
Because you told me not to call you if it was my class. It was.
不 我们只是恰好碰到 好吧
No. We just ran into each other. Okay.
我们只是两个恰好碰上的的无辜人
We're just two innocent folks who happen to be working out near each other.
正是
Exactly.
想游泳吗?
Do you want a swim?
好啊
Sure.
你知道 我只是在想...
You know, I was just thinking...
为什么我们不可以是朋友?
...why can't we be friends?
难道我就不能再有朋友了?
I mean, am I not allowed to have friends anymore?
难道我就不能再有漂亮朋友了?
I mean, am I not allowed to be friends with people that are hot?
我想说 这是什么可笑的偏见哪?
I mean, what kind of reverse prejudice is that?
我懂你的意思
I hear you.
我的意思是...
I mean...
难道我不能和一个已婚男人成为朋友?
...am I not supposed to be friends with a guy just because he's married?
对啊
Right.
或者这个有令人疯狂的笑容的男人?
Or has an insane smile?
或者有个令我想要 穿戴整齐地和他干的屁♥股♥?
Or an ass that makes me wanna dry hump?
你刚刚说了"穿戴整齐地和他干"? 是啊
Did you just say "dry hump"? Yeah.
我想过我是坠入爱河了
Think I just fell in love.
那么我们是朋友
So we're friends.
是啊
Yeah.
想一起来吗?
You wanna come in?
对不起 我想我定力不够
I'm sorry, I don't trust myself.
好吧 你看着就是
That's okay. You can just watch.
你或许是我这辈子最好的朋友
You know, you may be the best friend I've ever had.
嗨 嘿
Hi. Hey.
冲个凉 嘿 什么? 嗨
Take a shower. Hey. What? Hi.
宝贝儿? 嗯
Honey? Yeah.
你闻上去有点古怪
You smell weird.
我闻上去古怪? 是啊 不一样了
I smell weird? Yeah, different.
怎么不一样了? 不知道
Different how? I don't know.
有啥好奇怪的
Sort of an odd thing to say.
也许是因为我找到的那些烟头盒烟灰缸
You know, maybe it was the ashtray and cigarettes I found.
在后院
In the back yard.
"我爸爸死于肺癌"这件事
What part of "My dad died of lung cancer"...
都难以让你脑子把事情想清楚?
...is so hard for you to wrap your brain around?
什么?
What?
别对我撒谎 Ben 求你了 好吗?
Do not lie to me, Ben. Please, okay?
你是说真的?
Are you serious?
我们每天差不多有几千个临时工人 在这儿进进出出
We have, like, 8000 undocumented workers here daily.
好 然后你找到个放着烟头的烟灰缸 你就认为...
Okay, and you find an ashtray with cigarettes in it and you think...
你就自动认定那些都是我抽的
You automatically assume that they're mine.
呃 是
Oh, yeah.
亲爱的 我没对你撒谎
Honey, I'm not lying to you.
我想...
I think...
你是有点抓狂了
...you are really freaking out.
这次整个装♥修♥都在令你抓狂 因为它什么事也没发生
This whole renovation thing's getting to you because nothing's happening.
那只要对它说不
Just say no.
然后扔它出去
Get it out.
去冲澡了
Gonna take a shower.
我累了 好
I'm exhausted. Okay.
对不起 没关系
Sorry. It's all right.
谁会想到一个瑜伽课遇见的女孩
Who'd have thought that a random girl from yoga...
会是一个和自己这么合拍的接吻高手? 完全同意 美眉
...would fix me up with such a good kisser? Back at you, sister.
我等不及想要再吻你
I can't wait to kiss you again.
但我们现在就吻着啊
But we're kissing right now.
我知道 下一次
I know, next time.
第二次约会的话 会用更亲密的方式接吻
The second-date kiss is way more intimate.
听着...
Well, listen...
我明天要走 大概会有一阵子和你失去联♥系♥
...l'm leaving tomorrow, so I'll be out of touch for a little bit.
你能等等我吗? 我喝太多的健怡可乐了
Can you excuse me a quick second? Too many Diet Cokes.
好
Okay.
哦 好
Oh, yeah.
喂?
Yeah?
嘿 抱歉又打扰你 快速问答
Hey, sorry to bug you again. Quick question.
等我一分钟 宝贝 对不起
Excuse me one minute, babe. Sorry.
怎么了?
What's going on?
我正和一个人亲热...普通级的
Okay, I'm making out with this guy... PG stuff.
他说他要离开一段时间 会和我失去联♥系♥
And he mentions that he's going out of town, he's gonna be out of touch.
快跑
Run.
但或许他确实要离开
But maybe he is going out of town.
哪里? 去什么地方会没法联♥系♥到你?
Where? Where's he going that he's gonna be out of touch?
再问问 你离城要去哪儿?
Where are you going out of town to again?
呃...呃... 匹兹堡
Um... Uh... Pittsburgh.
匹兹堡
Pittsburgh.
快跑
Run.
那现在我就得 从每一个不喜欢我的男人身边跑开?
So, what, now I'm just supposed to run from every guy who doesn't like me?
是啊
Yeah.
那我就一个也不剩了
There's not gonna be anybody left.
我也不知道我为什么会这么说...