死侍与金刚狼（2024）

失陪一下
Can you excuse me for just a moment?I'm just gonna go over here.
吃大便吧 福斯
Suck it, Fox!
我要去迪士尼乐园了
I'm going to Disneyland.
去死啦
Get fucked!
在哪签名？ -文书作业免了
Where do I sign? -Oh, there's no need for paperwork.
很好 不是我吹牛 我不识字
Good. Not to brag, but I do not read.
不过我需要一样东西
Oh. -There is one thing I will need, though.
扯爆了
Oh, fuck off!
帮我换装吧 胡须张
Adorn me, Beardo.
帅到没朋友
Fuckin' A!
完美无缺！跟你说
It's perfect! FYI…
裁缝师很变♥态♥ 但我喜欢 超紧绷
your tailor is a predator,but I love it. Snug.
下面没有尴尬一大包
No camel toe.
有新车味道和亚德曼合金武士刀
New car smell and adamantium katanas?
干嘛这么客气
You shouldn't have.
别害羞 看到饱
Go ahead. Take it in.
对 你内♥裤♥变更紧了
And yes, your underwear is getting tighter.
那家伙懂我在说什么
That guy knows what I'm talking about.
他的穿着像中阶主管
His clothes says middle management…
但双眼有欲♥火♥在狂烧
but his eyes say fuck-y fuck-y.
对 你很帅
Yes. You look very nice.
帅？这位大哥都快扑上来了
"Nice?" Your buddy here is ready tothrow it all away for me.
打给老婆哦？ -人资部
You callin' your wife? -HR.
老婆在人资部上班？
Does your wife work in HR?
很高兴你这么喜欢
I'm really glad you're taking this so well.
何止喜欢
Oh. I'm taking it well.
我一向热爱出差 不过…
I have never had a problemtraveling for work. That said…
应该讨论一下休假安排
we should talk vacation days.
我偏好做一周休一周
I'm more of aone-week-on-one-week-off kind of guy.
丹麦就这么干
I think it's what they do in Denmark.
丹麦永远不会登陆月球
You know, you'll never see aDanish flag on the moon, but…
但他们可是幸福国度
goddamn it, they're happy.
打开你的手♥机♥
Now, let's power up your littleAmazon Fire phone there…
送我回家 我好让朋友知道他们…
and zip me back home so I can let my friendsknow that they've been upgraded…
升级变信徒了
to disciples.
我想你还没搞清楚
Yeah. I don't think you… quite understand.
你不能回家 因为你无家可回了
You will not be returning to your homebecause there will be no home to return to.
你说什么？
Come again?
在我耳边说
This time in my ears.
这是你的宇宙 威尔逊先生
This is your universe, Mr. Wilson.
那个…
That…
是宇宙失去定锚者时的情形
is what happens when a universeloses their Anchor Being.
看它从内部衰败的模样
See how it decays from the inside?
这就是现实衰亡的过程
This is how a reality dies.
什么是定锚者？
What's an Anchor Being?
定锚者是至关重要的实体 如果死亡
An Anchor Being is an entity ofsuch vital importance that when they die…
整个世界就慢慢衰亡消失
their whole worldslowly withers out of existence.
你中乐透了 因为我没死
You've just won the lotterybecause I didn't die.
只是中年危机 我已经好多了
It was just a little midlife crisis.I'm better now.
不…
Oh, no, no, no.
天呐 -笑笑没烦恼
Oh, my God. -Oh, I love to laugh.
你能想象你是定锚者吗？
Can you imagine if you were the Anchor Being?
不是你 威尔逊先生
Yeah. -No, it isn't you, Mr. Wilson.
你们的定锚者死于一场自我牺牲行动
Your Anchor Being diedin an act of self-sacrifice so epic…
悲壮到连时间轴都不寒而栗
that it sent shivers down the Timeline.
我指的当然是…
I am referring, of course, to…
罗根 金钢狼
Logan. The Wolverine.
别成为他们的产品
Don't be what they made you.
原来是这种感觉啊
So this is what it feels like…
罗根
Logan.
当然
Of course.
罗根
Logan.
罗根？
Logan?
手上长叉子的那个？
The guy with forks for hands?
那个金钢狼？
That Wolverine?
懂了 把古早的死亡视频关掉
Yeah, I got it. You can turn your retrographics of death off now.
快出手阻止
Make it stop.
我们没办法 根本无法阻止
We're not doing it, Mr. Wilson.We certainly can't stop it.
我们有多少时间？
How long have we got?
大多数情况 有几千年
In most cases, couple thousand years.
水哦 -大多数情况不够快
Well, sweet. -Well, most cases aren't fast enough.
对我不够
Not for me.
什么意思？
What does that mean?
意思是我已被交付任务
It means that I have been tasked…
负责监督你的宇宙终结
with overseeing the end of your universe.
不管楼上的官员想怎样
And regardless of what thepencil pushers upstairs would prefer…
我不要…
I will not…
浪费生命看着它因自然因素衰亡
waste my life watching it die slowlyof natural causes.
我们以前直接删减掉 干净俐落
We used to just prune these things. Simple.
优雅有效率 但听说时变局…
Elegant. Efficient. But I'm told the TVA…
已经不喜欢那样了 但我喜欢
doesn't like to do that anymore.Well I do.
不管我的上级说什么 多重宇宙…
And no matter what my so-calledsuperiors say, the multiverse…
不需要保姆
does not need a babysitter.
我们需要一个慈悲杀手
We need a mercy killer.
在这个状况下
And in this instance…
我就是那个慈悲杀手
I am the mercy killer.
那是什么东东？
What in the MacGuffin is that?
那是时间开膛手
That's a Time Ripper, Mr. Wilson.
加速装置
An accelerant.
完成后就能摧毁你宇宙的时空矩阵
Once completed, it will allow me to destroythe spacetime matrix of your universe.
其实我不想为时变局效力
You see, I don't want to work for the TVA.
我想成为时变局
I want to be the TVA.
第一步就是让这个组织明白
And the first step involvesshowing this organization…
它能变得多有效率
how much more efficient it can become.
所以我会让你的宇宙快速慈悲地终结
To wit, I will be giving your universea swift and compassionate end.
放心 你的朋友不会有感觉
And don't worry,your friends won't feel a thing.
结束时就像这样…那是什么？
It'll be over just like this."Oh, what's that?"
相信我
Trust me.
你要把我的宇宙安乐死？
You're gonna Old Yeller my fucking universe?
这么说也没错
Mm… In your parlance, yes.
心脏两枪 头上一枪
Two in the heart, one in the head.
威尔逊先生 你有两个选择
Look, Mr. Wilson, you have two choices.
重回心爱的人身边 集体消失
You can either rejoin your loved onesand collectively cease to exist in…
在72小时后 或者…
I'd say, seventy-two hours. Or…
加入神圣时间轴
you join the Sacred Timeline.
结束你无足轻重
And you end your days ofinsignificance…
平凡无奇的日子
and mediocrity.
韦德
Wade.
韦德 你终于…
Wade, you can finally…
能成为一个咖
finally, matter.
那才是我真心想要的
That's all I've ever really wanted.
我知道
I know.
我知道
I know.
而且我的道德底线随时能调整
And you know I'm,I'm nothing if not morally flexible.
好
Yep, yep.
我愿意
I'll do it.
算你聪明 神圣时间轴欢迎你加入
Wise choice.The Sacred Timeline's happy to have you.
我是说要找到金钢狼
I was actually talking aboutfinding the Wolverine…
还有打断你的鼻子
and breaking your fucking nose.
去找他 快去找他
Find him. Find him!
他果然找到了
And boy, did he ever.
所以我们回到了这里
Which brings us back to this.
亵渎这具神圣遗体
The desecration of the sacred corpse.
天呐
Oh, my God!
靠！我的手臂
Oh! My own fucking arm!
这才像话
Now we're talkin'!
不能这样
Not like this!
不 老天爷啊
No, dear God! No!
抱歉 金钢狼爪很难驾驭
I'm sorry! Wolverine-ing is hard!
快住手
Make it stop!