死侍与金刚狼（2024）

凯文费吉有说可♥卡♥因♥不给过
Hey, cocaine is the one thingthat Feige said is off limits.
不然改叫爽身粉？ -这也很明显
What about Bolivian marching powder? -They know all the slang terms.
他们有一串禁单
They have a list.
滑雪呢？ -迪斯可可粉也不行
Even snowboarding? -Even disco dust.
女生向碱走？ -阿甘正上也不行
White girl interrupted? -Even Forrest Bump.
鼻屎糖？ -糖霜甜甜圈都不准
Booger sugar? -I wouldn't even try powdered gonuts.
你想不想堆雪人？ -想 但我不能
You wanna build a snowman? -Yes. But I can't.
拉这里
Pull here.
这里？ -对
Here? -Yeah.
怎么了？ -好玩就在这里
What happened? -That's the fun part.
谢谢你来
Thanks for coming.
别客气
Yeah.
工作如何？
How's work?
我升官了
Oh, I got a promotion.
真假？
No way.
对 无聊的中阶管理职 但我很开心
Yeah. It's mind-numbing middle management,but I'm happy.
太棒了
That's great.
有交往对象吗？ -你呢？
You seeing anyone? -How about you?
有
Yeah.
一个同事 叫德蒙
A guy from work. Dermot.
德蒙
Dermot.
他人很好 -那就好
He's kind. -Good.
喜欢徒步
Likes to go hiking.
还没害我吃子弹
Hasn't gotten me shot yet.
话别说得太早
Well, it's early days.
你呢 有对象吗？
What about you? You seeing anyone?
没有 我住套房♥ 跟盲妇爱儿同床
No, no, I live in a one-bedroom apartment.I share a bed with Blind Al.
了解 -好
Okay. All right. -All right.
祝你生日快乐
Happy birthday to you
发表感言 -对
Speech! Speech!-Yes!
好啦…
All right. Okay, okay, okay.
过生日
Birthdays.
地球每绕行月球一圈都是新的冒险
Boy, every spin around the moonis a new adventure indeed.
太阳啦 蠢蛋 -好 你最行
Sun, dumbass. -Okay, round-earther.
我说到哪？ -人生的冒险
Where was I? -The adventure of life.
对
Right.
这几年真的很不好过
It's been a challenging few years.
好久没见到大家
Haven't seen you guys in a while.
我经历了很多 人生的变化
Been through a lot, change of life.
更年期？ -你不照剧本吗？
Menopause? -Bitch, are you improv-ing?
抱歉
Mm-mm. -Sorry.
抱歉让你见笑了 雪绪
I'm sorry that you had to see that, Yukio.
没关系
It's okay.
但我还是很快乐
But I'm happy.
这都是…
You know, and that's, that's…
因为有你们各位
because of each and every one of you.
我想说的是
I guess, what I'm trying to say is…
我好骄傲 好感恩
how proud I am, how grateful I am…
能站在这里
to be standing in a room…
跟我爱的每个人相聚
with every single person I love.
我是世上最幸运的人
I'm the luckiest man alive.
许个愿吧 朋友
Make a wish, buddy.
收到 好朋友
Ten-four, good buddy.
要吹咯
Going down.
韦德威尔逊？
Wade Wilson?
脱衣猛♥男♥ 一定是阿杜叫来的
Oh, yeah. Dancers.Dopinder must have ordered you.
这是警♥察♥扮装吗？
Are those supposed to be cop costumes?
当我没问
Never mind.
衣服脱♥光♥ 头盔戴着
Take your clothes off but leave the helmets.
这不是《麻雀变凤♥凰♥》
And this isn't Pretty Woman.
我们要亲嘴
We're kissing. All right?
你们通常用哪首舞曲？
What song do you guys normally dance to?
哇…
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
我应该要好怕怕吗？
Is that supposed to be scary?
后♥庭♥开花我不陌生
Pegging isn't new for me, friendo.
但对迪士尼是头一遭
But it is for Disney.
欸…
Ah, ta, ta, ta!
当零号♥我不熟练 所以要慢慢来
Okay, I've never been a natural bottom,so we're gonna take things real slow.
眼神要激♥情♥交会
And I want some crazy eye contact.
不是你 你
Not you.You.
隔着面具看不见眼睛 但我有感觉
Can't see your eyes through the mask,but I can feel them.
我们移到走廊上
We're gonna move on down the hallway…
免得事后难清理 大家意下如何？
so we can spare a cleanup on aisle asshole.How does everyone feel about this plan?
我不喜欢你 -这种态度就对了
I don't like you. -Yes. Let's hold on to that attitude.
做的时候把怒气发泄出来
And we're gonna do it angry.
威尔逊先生
Mr. Wilson…
你好像在昏迷时喷屎了
you appear to have soiled yourselfwhile unconscious.
我明明很醒 你哪位？
I wasn't unconscious. Who are you?
在下悖论
I go by the name of Paradox.
悖论先生 这里是时变局
Mr. Paradox.And you're sitting here at the TVA.
时间变异管理局
The Time Variance Authority.
我们是监控组织
We're really a watchdog organization…
但实际上比这名称轻松一点
except we're more lightheartedthan that sounds with a sort of…
有点复古讽刺的味道
throwback, ironic twist.
我们负责守护所谓的神圣时间轴
And we're in charge of defendingwhat's known as the Sacred Timeline.
哇靠 第三集解释这么多也太猛
Holy fuck. That is a shit-ton of expositionfor a threequel.
这是为了我用机堡的时光机吗？
Is this because I used Cable's time machine?
我救了几个人的命 然后就把它摧毁
Brought a couple of people back to life,then I destroyed it.
那是八百年前的事 -对
That was a long time ago. -Yes…
我们知道你滥用你的时间轴
we're aware of your abuse of your timeline.
残酷无情地乱搞
And you were so abusive of it.
不 跟那无关
No, it has nothing to do with that.
跟我来
Walk with me.
我带你来是想告诉你 你异于常人
I brought you here, Mr. Wilson,to tell you that you're special.
其实你获选来追求一项更高的目标
In fact,you've been chosen for a higher purpose…
连我都不清楚是什么
a purpose unclear even to me.
但这个目标
But one that could…
能拯救整个神圣时间轴
save the entire Sacred Timeline…
免于未来的恐怖命运
from a possibly grisly fatesometime in the future…
那很可能需要…复仇
which may very well need to be… avenged.
这个神圣时间轴
This Sacred Timeline…
我猜我会感到惊奇
I assume I'm going to marvel…
它充满了…
at how…
漫威电影感？
cinematic it feels?
客串演员无偿演出
Gratuitous cameos…
变体变来变去 什么都有？
indiscriminate use of Variants,the whole package?
你自己看
Well, you tell me.
队长
Cap!
你不再迷惘了 韦德
You are no longer lost, Wade.
你能成为英雄中的英雄
You can be a hero among heroes.
我们监视你好一阵子
We've been surveilling you for quite a while.
地铁站 -时变局前哨站 对
Subway station. -A TVA outpost, yes.
那是什么？
And what is that? -Hmm?
那是我吗？那是索尔吗？
Is that me? Is that Thor?
他在哭哦？
Is he crying?
先别想太多
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
那发生在遥远的未来
That happens in the distant future.
索尔干嘛哭？告诉我 -别跟她说话
Why is Thor crying? Quick! Tell me. -Do not speak to her.
别闹了 看着我
Stop that. Eyes on me.
我带你过来是为了给你机会
I brought you hereto offer you an opportunity.
多年前你追求过 但没准备好的机会
The opportunity you sought years ago,but for which you were not ready.
我们相信现在你准备好了
We believe you're ready now.
迎接离开你的时间轴…
Ready for a chance to leave your timeline…
加入最伟大宇宙的机会
and join the greatest universe of all.
我要实现你肖想已久的心愿
I am about to give you the thingyou've always wanted.
我懂你的意思
Oh, I smell what you're steppin' in.
漫威宇宙的力量即将彻底改变
The power in the Marvel Universeis about to change forever.
我是救世主
I am the Messiah…
我就是…
I am…
漫威耶稣
Marvel Jesus.